Motivation
It's starting to worry me that I don't feel motivated to do schoolwork. Usually at least I'll worry about letting people down or something, but I'm not even really feeling that right now. I'm well used to occasional "I don't wanna do this!" moments, but that's usually for just a particular assignment, and right now it's kind of everything.
What's really weird about this is that I'm not unhappy, it's just that school's not doing it for me. I'm used to school being my thing, and it's just...not as fun as I want it to be right now. Classes aren't as much fun as I want them to be, homework isn't particularly interesting, I'm not feeling any kind of compulsion to write my papers (and not in that way like "Oh my god, deadline's coming up!!" but in that way like at the moment I honestly don't care), and it's starting to disturb me. I don't want to fail, so I'm going to keep working (and I'll likely be freaking out in the near future), it's just not fun anymore. Maybe it's the classes I'm taking, and it'll get better next semester. It'll probably get better next semester anyway, just by virtue of me being used to it more and it not being anywhere near the end of the year. I just can't tell whether it's that this school isn't as good as my old one, or if it's just that I had more fun being an undergrad (and getting to take a whole bunch of classes instead of just history.) I don't know if I like either option here, really.
I dunno. Maybe I'm just thinking about this stuff because I don't want to read this book or think about my upcoming deadlines. I kind of wish work was over already so that I could focus properly on school stuff, but at the same time I'm having a lot more fun at work than I am at school, so it'll be sad to see it go. Oh well, I suppose I'll cross that when I get to it.
Hope everybody's well. Huzzah for Obama winning and Prop 30 passing! I was downright spastic yesterday. Nothing like homework to sober a person.
Omittchi
What's really weird about this is that I'm not unhappy, it's just that school's not doing it for me. I'm used to school being my thing, and it's just...not as fun as I want it to be right now. Classes aren't as much fun as I want them to be, homework isn't particularly interesting, I'm not feeling any kind of compulsion to write my papers (and not in that way like "Oh my god, deadline's coming up!!" but in that way like at the moment I honestly don't care), and it's starting to disturb me. I don't want to fail, so I'm going to keep working (and I'll likely be freaking out in the near future), it's just not fun anymore. Maybe it's the classes I'm taking, and it'll get better next semester. It'll probably get better next semester anyway, just by virtue of me being used to it more and it not being anywhere near the end of the year. I just can't tell whether it's that this school isn't as good as my old one, or if it's just that I had more fun being an undergrad (and getting to take a whole bunch of classes instead of just history.) I don't know if I like either option here, really.
I dunno. Maybe I'm just thinking about this stuff because I don't want to read this book or think about my upcoming deadlines. I kind of wish work was over already so that I could focus properly on school stuff, but at the same time I'm having a lot more fun at work than I am at school, so it'll be sad to see it go. Oh well, I suppose I'll cross that when I get to it.
Hope everybody's well. Huzzah for Obama winning and Prop 30 passing! I was downright spastic yesterday. Nothing like homework to sober a person.
Omittchi