Dear missing hat.
if you were stolen, i will blow the person who took you up.
if you are at kitten's, you will be found and i will love you more than any other hat.
if i never find you again, i will be heartbroken and forced to buy a new one off ebay.
did i mention the hat was in a purse?
so if any one DID steal the hat from courtney's purse.
i will beat the shit out of you just for digging in her purse.