50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind
1. How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
If I didn't know how old I was, I would say that I was about twenty. I act like a child sometimes, but I'm actually quite mature for my age.
2. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
Never trying is definitely worse in any situation. I would rather try something and fail at it than never have experienced it at all.
3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don't like and like so many things we don't do?
We do things we don't like because we feel obligated to do them most of the time, or we feel that the experience of it will make us better people. Well, most of us feel that way. There are people who just do whatever they're told to do despite their own personal preferences. We like things we don't do because it's easier to wish for something than it is to actually make it happen.
4. When it's all said and done, will you have said more than you've done?
At this point, yes. I'm very good about talking about things I would like to do, but I rarely get around to actually doing them. I'm actually thinking about making a list of things I would like to do in the next five years and working as hard as I can to get those goals accomplished.
5. What is the one thing you'd most like to change about the world?
The one thing I'd most like to change about the world is all the negativity that comes from peoples' mouths. Whether it's race, sex, disability, orientation, religious, or some other type of discrimination, it is negative energy that brings down the morale of the world. It's because of the negativity that people like to project into the universe that the world is so harsh and cruel. It's full of skeptics and hurtful people, and they're that way because they expect everybody else to be. I'd like to change that.
6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
If happiness was the national currency, I would be employed in either the culinary arts (like I plan to be) or I would be a tattoo artist. I can't draw, however, so that's why being a tattoo artist isn't a possibility. Having some artistic skill is required for being a pastry chef, but I believe that I can manage whatever comes my way. Either of those professions would make me insanely happy.
7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
I am doing what I believe in. I don't believe in settling; it only makes me unhappy. I believe in the best for everyone, and I work to attain that goal every day. I believe in LGBT rights, and I'm active on several websites and I do what I can to support those causes.
8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
If the average human life span was 40 years, I would be more aggressive. At this point, I feel like I have plenty of time to do what I need/want to do, so I'm really not in a hurry to get my life going, so to speak. I'm not pushing things to happen like I would be if I only had around 40 years.
9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
I have controlled quite a bit of it, actually. I made the decision to leave my mother and move in with my parents. I made the decision to come out of the closet and gain control of who I am, which in turn caused me to get a better reign on my emotions and become a more stable person. I am actively fighting my parents to take control of myself, and it's a daily struggle. I will not give up until I am a completely independent person; I hate depending on people for anything.
10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
I am more worried about doing the right things right. It's a combination of both of those options. I feel that doing things right is important, but there's no sense in doing them right if they're the wrong things. I would much rather do the right things the way they're supposed to be done.
11. You're having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticising a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
I tell them that I'm actually a close friend of theirs, and that they need to stop talking about her. I don't care how much I respect and admire them; they're not worthy of my respect and admiration if they're just going to talk shit about someone they clearly don't know that well. If they knew her well, they would've known that we were close friends and would've kept their opinions to themselves.
12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
If I could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, it would have to be "Live your life for you and nobody else." It's so easy to get lost in what people want from you, but if you stay true to who you are (to use a cliche) and are confident in what you believe in and what you feel, then you can't go wrong. It may be the harder path in life, but it's the one that will ultimately make you happy.
13. Would you break the law to save a loved one?
Absolutely. If they're someone I care about greatly, as the term "loved one" implies, then I would do absolutely anything for them. I would only break the law, however, if they needed to be saved. I would not break the law simply because they asked me to because they needed help with something illegal.
14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?
Yes, I have. Looking back through poems that I've written, I see creativity. Initially when I wrote them, I thought, "Holy fuck. I'm batshit insane." Now that I look back on them, I see that there was thought and method in my poems that I didn't quite realise I was even doing until years later. It's kinda strange to see that level of creativity from a time when I thought I was losing everything.
15. What's something you know you do differently than most people?
To put it quite plainly, I live differently than most people. It might seem like a cop out to some of you, but it's true. I live my life by my own set of rules, and sometimes those rules are pointless and stupid. Other times they're useful and thoughtful, and they have helped shape me into who I am.
16. How come the things that make you happy don't make everyone happy?
This is a simple question to answer. The reason why the things that make me happy don't make everyone happy is because everyone is different. We were all raised differently, and we have all had different experiences. These each affect the way we see things and it influences our likes and dislikes. I, for instance, like women. Not everybody likes women the way I do. I like to bake cakes, and not everybody likes to bake. They'd much rather have someone bake for them. Which is fortunate, otherwise I'd be fucked. :)
17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What's holding you back?
This might sound really dumb, but the one thing that I've not done that I really want to do is be in a relationship with a girl that lasts longer than a month. I've never had a relationship last longer than a week, and I desperately want to be in a relationship. I want that closeness that comes with having a girlfriend. There are a couple of things holding me back. One is the lack of openly gay/bisexual girls/women in my community. There are a few, but the few I've tried dating have not been public, and things kind of died quickly. Another thing that's holding me back is my own insecurity. I don't like to take risks, and it's something that I'm trying to improve on. I'm not as spontaneous as I'd like to be, and that self-doubt does no good when looking for a lover.
18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
I'm always holding onto things I need to let go of. Both literally and figuratively. I probably should let go of half of my wardrobe, yet I hold onto it because I've got nothing else to wear. I also should let go of all the negative feelings I have about myself. I've improved greatly over the past couple of years, but there's still some lingering self-hate. I definitely need to let that go.
19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
If I had to move to a different country, I would move to Argentina. Buenos Aires, specifically. It's the largest gay city in the Latin community, and the country itself is just beautiful. I've fallen in love with Argentina. If I had to move to a different state, I would move to California. Los Angeles, specifically. It just seems like it's a lot of fun there.
20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
I used to push the elevator button multiple times, but I don't anymore. I realised that it goes the same speed no matter how many times I push it.
21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
Oh, that's a very difficult question to tackle. Honestly, I'd rather be a joyful simpleton. I'm quite intelligent as it is (not to brag or anything) and I feel that it's because of that reason I'm worried all the damn time about every damn thing. Being simple would make my life easier.
22. Why are you, you?
I am me because of the people that have influenced me and the experiences I've had growing up. I've been through so much adversity that I know what it feels like to believe that nobody is there for you and you have no hope of ever being rescued. I've also got a semi-supportive family and fantastic friends that support me no matter what the fuck I do. Actually, part of what makes me who I am is the teachers that I've had. I remember them all and how they affected me. I would be nowhere without their guidance, especially the teachers I had in high school. Never before have I felt so cared for by school faculty. They helped me greatly. :)
23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
i believe I have been, yes. I am supportive of my friends, no matter what they want to do. I might think their decisions are stupid, but as long as they are not going to harm themselves I will support them. I am honest with them and give them advice whenever I can (assuming they need it, of course).
24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
I would say that losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you is definitely worse than losing contact with a friend that has moved away. At least when they've moved you know that you've lost contact because your lives are now entirely separate and you each have your own stuff going on. When you lose touch with a friend that lives right near you, it hurts every single day that you have to see them. I have experienced this, and it's really not fun.
25. What are you most grateful for?
I am most grateful for my friends that I have. They are so damn supportive of me, and I love them so much. No matter what I do they're there for me, and I have never had that before. I am definitely grateful for them, and I always will be. :)
26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
I'd rather lose all of my old memories, honestly. Although everything I experienced in the past has helped make me who I am, I can never grow or learn from my experiences if I can't remember them. I'd rather have to start from scratch than be stuck for the rest of my life the way I am. I need to expand and broaden my horizons.
27. Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
Not really. I always challenge the truth, because I don't want to accept something I've heard is the truth if it's not really the truth. I challenge it because it's the only way I'll ever find out if it is, in fact, the truth. I believe things when I see them for myself.
28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?
To put it shortly, yes.
29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
I was upset frequently five years ago. They don't all matter now, because they've all been resolved by now, but they did matter a lot at the time.
30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
My happiest childhood memory is probably playing in the playground with my best friend, Cris. He was so special to me, and still is, even though I haven't spoken to him in several years. He was my first best friend and I could trust him with absolutely anything. He was also my first kiss with a boy, and I was his. It's amusing because we both turned out to be gay later on. (I found him on Myspace, haha)
31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
I would say that I have felt most passionate and alive while thinking about my life I have now. It seems strange, but I truly feel like I can do anything right now.
32. If not now, then when?
If not now, then at the soonest possible date.
33. If you haven't achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
What I have to lose is the possibility of ever achieving it by doing something stupid or not seizing the opportunity to get it.
34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
Actually, I have. It happens frequently with Dakota. Either we'll be in the same room and not say a thing to each other, or we'll be on the phone and not talk for 20 minutes straight. We don't need to talk to know what the other is thinking, most of the time.
35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
Religions that support love cause so many wars because they get blinded by their love for their deity and their cause. This causes them to act with violence; they're trying to force their wills onto others, so they can feel the "love" brought on by their religion.
36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
To put it shortly, yes, you can. There are times when you just know if something is good or evil.
37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
I am unemployed, so I wouldn't have a job to quit. :P
38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
I would rather have more work I actually enjoy doing. I like being productive, and if it's something I enjoy doing I'll do it to the absolute best of my abilities.
39. Do you feel like you've lived this day a hundred times before?
Oh my god, yes. Today is exactly how every single weekday has been since graduation. Wake up late, eat, get on the computer, talk to people for a bit, eat, get on the computer till 6 am, sleep, repeat.
40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?
When I started this school year. I was out to a couple of my friends, none of my family, and I was fucking terrified. I didn't know what to expect from the students or staff. However, I believed in myself and my belief that I wouldn't let others' perceptions of me affect the fun I had this year. The result was the best damn school year I've ever had. :D
41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
I would visit the Howards, Hannah, Shayne, my grandparents, Mom, my aunts/uncles, and my teachers.
42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?
Fuck, no. I'm selfish with my life and I want as much of it as possible. My goal is to live forever, so why the hell would I trade part of it for fame or beauty?? That'd be really fucking dumb.
43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
The difference between being alive and truly living is whether or not you're happy. If you're doing what you love, you're surrounded by the people you love, and you wouldn't trade it for anything, then you're truly living. If you're just doing the bare minimum, and you wish you could be anywhere but where you currently are, then you are simply alive, and you're not living your life as best it could be.
44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
Right now is that time. Just do what you know is right and screw what others think of it. It's easier to apologise than ask for permission.
45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
We are afraid to make mistakes because we've been conditioned to be that way. We're deathly afraid of the consequences of that mistake, and we're also worried about what people will think of us because of the mistakes that we've made, rather than the positive impact we've had on the world.
46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
This might sound really stupid, but I would dress how I want to dress. I'd be a little racier, more Goth, and definitely more me. I'd just be more relaxed about my appearance in general, I suppose.
47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
The last time I noticed the sound of my own breathing was actually last night before I went to bed. I concentrate on my breathing to help me sleep.
48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
I love my friends, no doubt about that. I'm always telling them how much I love them, and I have no problem expressing that love in public.
49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
Eh, probably not.
50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
I am making most of them for myself. There are some that my parents insist on making for me, even though I'm capable of making them for myself. However, I am doing what I can to fight for that little bit of decision-making control over myself. I'm slowly winning, too. :)
If I didn't know how old I was, I would say that I was about twenty. I act like a child sometimes, but I'm actually quite mature for my age.
2. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
Never trying is definitely worse in any situation. I would rather try something and fail at it than never have experienced it at all.
3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don't like and like so many things we don't do?
We do things we don't like because we feel obligated to do them most of the time, or we feel that the experience of it will make us better people. Well, most of us feel that way. There are people who just do whatever they're told to do despite their own personal preferences. We like things we don't do because it's easier to wish for something than it is to actually make it happen.
4. When it's all said and done, will you have said more than you've done?
At this point, yes. I'm very good about talking about things I would like to do, but I rarely get around to actually doing them. I'm actually thinking about making a list of things I would like to do in the next five years and working as hard as I can to get those goals accomplished.
5. What is the one thing you'd most like to change about the world?
The one thing I'd most like to change about the world is all the negativity that comes from peoples' mouths. Whether it's race, sex, disability, orientation, religious, or some other type of discrimination, it is negative energy that brings down the morale of the world. It's because of the negativity that people like to project into the universe that the world is so harsh and cruel. It's full of skeptics and hurtful people, and they're that way because they expect everybody else to be. I'd like to change that.
6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
If happiness was the national currency, I would be employed in either the culinary arts (like I plan to be) or I would be a tattoo artist. I can't draw, however, so that's why being a tattoo artist isn't a possibility. Having some artistic skill is required for being a pastry chef, but I believe that I can manage whatever comes my way. Either of those professions would make me insanely happy.
7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
I am doing what I believe in. I don't believe in settling; it only makes me unhappy. I believe in the best for everyone, and I work to attain that goal every day. I believe in LGBT rights, and I'm active on several websites and I do what I can to support those causes.
8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
If the average human life span was 40 years, I would be more aggressive. At this point, I feel like I have plenty of time to do what I need/want to do, so I'm really not in a hurry to get my life going, so to speak. I'm not pushing things to happen like I would be if I only had around 40 years.
9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
I have controlled quite a bit of it, actually. I made the decision to leave my mother and move in with my parents. I made the decision to come out of the closet and gain control of who I am, which in turn caused me to get a better reign on my emotions and become a more stable person. I am actively fighting my parents to take control of myself, and it's a daily struggle. I will not give up until I am a completely independent person; I hate depending on people for anything.
10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
I am more worried about doing the right things right. It's a combination of both of those options. I feel that doing things right is important, but there's no sense in doing them right if they're the wrong things. I would much rather do the right things the way they're supposed to be done.
11. You're having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticising a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
I tell them that I'm actually a close friend of theirs, and that they need to stop talking about her. I don't care how much I respect and admire them; they're not worthy of my respect and admiration if they're just going to talk shit about someone they clearly don't know that well. If they knew her well, they would've known that we were close friends and would've kept their opinions to themselves.
12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
If I could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, it would have to be "Live your life for you and nobody else." It's so easy to get lost in what people want from you, but if you stay true to who you are (to use a cliche) and are confident in what you believe in and what you feel, then you can't go wrong. It may be the harder path in life, but it's the one that will ultimately make you happy.
13. Would you break the law to save a loved one?
Absolutely. If they're someone I care about greatly, as the term "loved one" implies, then I would do absolutely anything for them. I would only break the law, however, if they needed to be saved. I would not break the law simply because they asked me to because they needed help with something illegal.
14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?
Yes, I have. Looking back through poems that I've written, I see creativity. Initially when I wrote them, I thought, "Holy fuck. I'm batshit insane." Now that I look back on them, I see that there was thought and method in my poems that I didn't quite realise I was even doing until years later. It's kinda strange to see that level of creativity from a time when I thought I was losing everything.
15. What's something you know you do differently than most people?
To put it quite plainly, I live differently than most people. It might seem like a cop out to some of you, but it's true. I live my life by my own set of rules, and sometimes those rules are pointless and stupid. Other times they're useful and thoughtful, and they have helped shape me into who I am.
16. How come the things that make you happy don't make everyone happy?
This is a simple question to answer. The reason why the things that make me happy don't make everyone happy is because everyone is different. We were all raised differently, and we have all had different experiences. These each affect the way we see things and it influences our likes and dislikes. I, for instance, like women. Not everybody likes women the way I do. I like to bake cakes, and not everybody likes to bake. They'd much rather have someone bake for them. Which is fortunate, otherwise I'd be fucked. :)
17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What's holding you back?
This might sound really dumb, but the one thing that I've not done that I really want to do is be in a relationship with a girl that lasts longer than a month. I've never had a relationship last longer than a week, and I desperately want to be in a relationship. I want that closeness that comes with having a girlfriend. There are a couple of things holding me back. One is the lack of openly gay/bisexual girls/women in my community. There are a few, but the few I've tried dating have not been public, and things kind of died quickly. Another thing that's holding me back is my own insecurity. I don't like to take risks, and it's something that I'm trying to improve on. I'm not as spontaneous as I'd like to be, and that self-doubt does no good when looking for a lover.
18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
I'm always holding onto things I need to let go of. Both literally and figuratively. I probably should let go of half of my wardrobe, yet I hold onto it because I've got nothing else to wear. I also should let go of all the negative feelings I have about myself. I've improved greatly over the past couple of years, but there's still some lingering self-hate. I definitely need to let that go.
19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
If I had to move to a different country, I would move to Argentina. Buenos Aires, specifically. It's the largest gay city in the Latin community, and the country itself is just beautiful. I've fallen in love with Argentina. If I had to move to a different state, I would move to California. Los Angeles, specifically. It just seems like it's a lot of fun there.
20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
I used to push the elevator button multiple times, but I don't anymore. I realised that it goes the same speed no matter how many times I push it.
21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
Oh, that's a very difficult question to tackle. Honestly, I'd rather be a joyful simpleton. I'm quite intelligent as it is (not to brag or anything) and I feel that it's because of that reason I'm worried all the damn time about every damn thing. Being simple would make my life easier.
22. Why are you, you?
I am me because of the people that have influenced me and the experiences I've had growing up. I've been through so much adversity that I know what it feels like to believe that nobody is there for you and you have no hope of ever being rescued. I've also got a semi-supportive family and fantastic friends that support me no matter what the fuck I do. Actually, part of what makes me who I am is the teachers that I've had. I remember them all and how they affected me. I would be nowhere without their guidance, especially the teachers I had in high school. Never before have I felt so cared for by school faculty. They helped me greatly. :)
23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
i believe I have been, yes. I am supportive of my friends, no matter what they want to do. I might think their decisions are stupid, but as long as they are not going to harm themselves I will support them. I am honest with them and give them advice whenever I can (assuming they need it, of course).
24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
I would say that losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you is definitely worse than losing contact with a friend that has moved away. At least when they've moved you know that you've lost contact because your lives are now entirely separate and you each have your own stuff going on. When you lose touch with a friend that lives right near you, it hurts every single day that you have to see them. I have experienced this, and it's really not fun.
25. What are you most grateful for?
I am most grateful for my friends that I have. They are so damn supportive of me, and I love them so much. No matter what I do they're there for me, and I have never had that before. I am definitely grateful for them, and I always will be. :)
26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
I'd rather lose all of my old memories, honestly. Although everything I experienced in the past has helped make me who I am, I can never grow or learn from my experiences if I can't remember them. I'd rather have to start from scratch than be stuck for the rest of my life the way I am. I need to expand and broaden my horizons.
27. Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
Not really. I always challenge the truth, because I don't want to accept something I've heard is the truth if it's not really the truth. I challenge it because it's the only way I'll ever find out if it is, in fact, the truth. I believe things when I see them for myself.
28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?
To put it shortly, yes.
29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
I was upset frequently five years ago. They don't all matter now, because they've all been resolved by now, but they did matter a lot at the time.
30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
My happiest childhood memory is probably playing in the playground with my best friend, Cris. He was so special to me, and still is, even though I haven't spoken to him in several years. He was my first best friend and I could trust him with absolutely anything. He was also my first kiss with a boy, and I was his. It's amusing because we both turned out to be gay later on. (I found him on Myspace, haha)
31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
I would say that I have felt most passionate and alive while thinking about my life I have now. It seems strange, but I truly feel like I can do anything right now.
32. If not now, then when?
If not now, then at the soonest possible date.
33. If you haven't achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
What I have to lose is the possibility of ever achieving it by doing something stupid or not seizing the opportunity to get it.
34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
Actually, I have. It happens frequently with Dakota. Either we'll be in the same room and not say a thing to each other, or we'll be on the phone and not talk for 20 minutes straight. We don't need to talk to know what the other is thinking, most of the time.
35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
Religions that support love cause so many wars because they get blinded by their love for their deity and their cause. This causes them to act with violence; they're trying to force their wills onto others, so they can feel the "love" brought on by their religion.
36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
To put it shortly, yes, you can. There are times when you just know if something is good or evil.
37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
I am unemployed, so I wouldn't have a job to quit. :P
38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
I would rather have more work I actually enjoy doing. I like being productive, and if it's something I enjoy doing I'll do it to the absolute best of my abilities.
39. Do you feel like you've lived this day a hundred times before?
Oh my god, yes. Today is exactly how every single weekday has been since graduation. Wake up late, eat, get on the computer, talk to people for a bit, eat, get on the computer till 6 am, sleep, repeat.
40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?
When I started this school year. I was out to a couple of my friends, none of my family, and I was fucking terrified. I didn't know what to expect from the students or staff. However, I believed in myself and my belief that I wouldn't let others' perceptions of me affect the fun I had this year. The result was the best damn school year I've ever had. :D
41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
I would visit the Howards, Hannah, Shayne, my grandparents, Mom, my aunts/uncles, and my teachers.
42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?
Fuck, no. I'm selfish with my life and I want as much of it as possible. My goal is to live forever, so why the hell would I trade part of it for fame or beauty?? That'd be really fucking dumb.
43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
The difference between being alive and truly living is whether or not you're happy. If you're doing what you love, you're surrounded by the people you love, and you wouldn't trade it for anything, then you're truly living. If you're just doing the bare minimum, and you wish you could be anywhere but where you currently are, then you are simply alive, and you're not living your life as best it could be.
44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
Right now is that time. Just do what you know is right and screw what others think of it. It's easier to apologise than ask for permission.
45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
We are afraid to make mistakes because we've been conditioned to be that way. We're deathly afraid of the consequences of that mistake, and we're also worried about what people will think of us because of the mistakes that we've made, rather than the positive impact we've had on the world.
46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
This might sound really stupid, but I would dress how I want to dress. I'd be a little racier, more Goth, and definitely more me. I'd just be more relaxed about my appearance in general, I suppose.
47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
The last time I noticed the sound of my own breathing was actually last night before I went to bed. I concentrate on my breathing to help me sleep.
48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
I love my friends, no doubt about that. I'm always telling them how much I love them, and I have no problem expressing that love in public.
49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
Eh, probably not.
50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
I am making most of them for myself. There are some that my parents insist on making for me, even though I'm capable of making them for myself. However, I am doing what I can to fight for that little bit of decision-making control over myself. I'm slowly winning, too. :)