Project: Who - The Time Monster
The Time Monster
Written by Robert Sloman and Barry Letts
Directed by Paul Bernard
The Doctor has weird crazy dreams about The Master. Useless finally has something "smart" to say: "I know I'm exceedingly dim." Well no kidding. Talk about a revelation there, Useless.
The Master is masquerading as a professor, working on some kind of experiment named TOMTIT.
Newspapers are reporting the possible discovery of Atlantis.
Big LOL at the two scientists - There's a guy and a girl. She talks about how all men are big jerks, then says not to worry, he's not a real man. And he doesn't even blink. They're either brother and sister, or he's gay and she's his BFF. Or both. Ah yeah, they are brother and sister, plus he's gay and she's his BFF.
The Doctor and Useless head towards the signals from the Master's Tardis - the TOMTIT. They are using a scanner which is quite obviously designed based on a certain piece of male anatomy. And this is WAY before the Russell T Davies era!
The Master turns his machine on and everyone loses their shit.
The Doctor arrives and reverses the polarity. The gay brother, Stewart, has rapidly aged from his 20s to his 80s. The Master runs away.
The Greek Titan Kronos was apparently a time traveler, and the Master intends to bring him back, to help him harness phenomenal cosmic power, in an itty bitty living space.
However, it wasn't Kronos who showed up via TOMTIT. It was a high priest of the temple of Poseidon.
Kronos does appear. He's little more than a child covered in a bedsheet, pretending to be a ghost. Where's the scooby gang when you need them?
The Master sends hallucinations to attack the UNIT soldiers, who are transporting the Doctor's Tardis.
As the Brig, the Doctor, and Useless watch, a bomber plane appears and fires on the soldiers. They watch, horrified, as it looks like their friends are toast.
Some are hurt, but none are killed. The Master goes inside TOMTIT. The Doctor uses wibbly wobbily to put his Tardis inside the Master's ship. Just go with it.
The Tardis is inside the Tardis, which inside the Tardis. It's an infinite loop.
The two Time Lords argue and play games with each others' ships.
Kronos "eats" the Doctor. The Master separates the two Tardi (Tardises?) and Useless faints.
The Doctor is alive, in the time vortex. He talks to Useless. The Tardis rescues him.
The Master arrives at Atlantis, followed by the Doctor and Useless.
Wondering around, exploring, separating and lots of politics follow.
The Minotaur screams at Useless and it looks like she's finally going to die! But sadly, the Doctor saves her. And the Minotaur is dead too. Double damn.
The Master kills the King and takes over as the new King of Atlantis.
The Master unleashes Kronos on them, kidnaps Useless and escapes in his Tardis, followed by the Doctor in his.
Useless sabotages the Master's Tardis, causing them to be trapped in time/space. Kronos, now a benevolent being, frees them.
TOMTIT is destroyed, the gay brother is restored to his youth, UNIT soldiers are back to normal, and we all have a laugh at Benton's expense.
* * *
What the hell? A perfectly good opportunity to get rid of the most annoying companion of the classic series, and they save her? I don't understand this at all.
I also don't understand Russell Davies. In the spin-off series, The Sarah Jane Adventures, he does a two-parter bringing back a classic series companion. The man who is utterly obsessed with the chav Rose Tyler picks Useless as the one to bring back.
He needs to have his head examined. For a gay man, he is seriously obsessed with bottle blonds with large mammories and empty heads.
I did at least get one laugh at Useless admitting she's dumb as a box of rocks.
This was a great two part story stretched to six parts. There just is not enough story to justify the padding. At best, it could have been padded to three parts and still kept up some of the good points.
Written by Robert Sloman and Barry Letts
Directed by Paul Bernard
The Doctor has weird crazy dreams about The Master. Useless finally has something "smart" to say: "I know I'm exceedingly dim." Well no kidding. Talk about a revelation there, Useless.
The Master is masquerading as a professor, working on some kind of experiment named TOMTIT.
Newspapers are reporting the possible discovery of Atlantis.
Big LOL at the two scientists - There's a guy and a girl. She talks about how all men are big jerks, then says not to worry, he's not a real man. And he doesn't even blink. They're either brother and sister, or he's gay and she's his BFF. Or both. Ah yeah, they are brother and sister, plus he's gay and she's his BFF.
The Doctor and Useless head towards the signals from the Master's Tardis - the TOMTIT. They are using a scanner which is quite obviously designed based on a certain piece of male anatomy. And this is WAY before the Russell T Davies era!
The Master turns his machine on and everyone loses their shit.
The Doctor arrives and reverses the polarity. The gay brother, Stewart, has rapidly aged from his 20s to his 80s. The Master runs away.
The Greek Titan Kronos was apparently a time traveler, and the Master intends to bring him back, to help him harness phenomenal cosmic power, in an itty bitty living space.
However, it wasn't Kronos who showed up via TOMTIT. It was a high priest of the temple of Poseidon.
Kronos does appear. He's little more than a child covered in a bedsheet, pretending to be a ghost. Where's the scooby gang when you need them?
The Master sends hallucinations to attack the UNIT soldiers, who are transporting the Doctor's Tardis.
As the Brig, the Doctor, and Useless watch, a bomber plane appears and fires on the soldiers. They watch, horrified, as it looks like their friends are toast.
Some are hurt, but none are killed. The Master goes inside TOMTIT. The Doctor uses wibbly wobbily to put his Tardis inside the Master's ship. Just go with it.
The Tardis is inside the Tardis, which inside the Tardis. It's an infinite loop.
The two Time Lords argue and play games with each others' ships.
Kronos "eats" the Doctor. The Master separates the two Tardi (Tardises?) and Useless faints.
The Doctor is alive, in the time vortex. He talks to Useless. The Tardis rescues him.
The Master arrives at Atlantis, followed by the Doctor and Useless.
Wondering around, exploring, separating and lots of politics follow.
The Minotaur screams at Useless and it looks like she's finally going to die! But sadly, the Doctor saves her. And the Minotaur is dead too. Double damn.
The Master kills the King and takes over as the new King of Atlantis.
The Master unleashes Kronos on them, kidnaps Useless and escapes in his Tardis, followed by the Doctor in his.
Useless sabotages the Master's Tardis, causing them to be trapped in time/space. Kronos, now a benevolent being, frees them.
TOMTIT is destroyed, the gay brother is restored to his youth, UNIT soldiers are back to normal, and we all have a laugh at Benton's expense.
* * *
What the hell? A perfectly good opportunity to get rid of the most annoying companion of the classic series, and they save her? I don't understand this at all.
I also don't understand Russell Davies. In the spin-off series, The Sarah Jane Adventures, he does a two-parter bringing back a classic series companion. The man who is utterly obsessed with the chav Rose Tyler picks Useless as the one to bring back.
He needs to have his head examined. For a gay man, he is seriously obsessed with bottle blonds with large mammories and empty heads.
I did at least get one laugh at Useless admitting she's dumb as a box of rocks.
This was a great two part story stretched to six parts. There just is not enough story to justify the padding. At best, it could have been padded to three parts and still kept up some of the good points.