Sep 27, 2009 09:42
Over the past year or so I've been pretty quiet. There are a number of reasons for this...some of which I'll mention in this post, some of which I won't. Some I may never actually discuss. One very particular reason is that, after a period of time, I've discovered that when one has a great deal to say it becomes difficult to say anything. There is so much to talk about that it becomes hard to figure out where to start, what to focus on for that particular post, and when to end it. Eventually, one just says, "Oh, the hell with it" and starts up a game. It doesn't help that the game must be played for work (I'm not kidding about this...I do review games for a living, so that makes this excuse even more difficult to ignore).
But I also use this excuse to avoid contact with others. I think that is another problem I have been having over the past year...probably more. When you work from home, contact with others becomes a chore to arrange. Eventually, you start convincing yourself on a subconscious level that you are not interesting enough for other people's time and space, and besides, don't you have that game to review? Being epileptic and having problems getting places doesn't make it easier.
So, what I guess I'm saying is that I intend to start posting in my blog again on a regular basis, not just as a means to communicate my thoughts to other people, but as a means of therapy for myself. To remind myself that I am a worthwhile person (you know that when just saying a phrase like that makes you tear up, you have issues).
So, what have I been up to these past 12 months (or more)? A lot, actually. I have been a busy bee (bzz, bzz, bzz). I'm not going to spend this post talking in detail about all of it...I'll be posting in detail separately about each one. But I'll summarize.
I had two separate revelationary events in the past 12 months. The first one was in January. Some events occurred around my business at that time that caused me to make some very hard, very difficult decisions. Of course, the universe felt that such decisions couldn't be made in a vacuum, so it saw fit to send the death of my beloved Dinah the same week. In the end, those decisions helped me a great deal with much of my business stuff, but I'm due to make some more decisions about work in the next four months. Joy.
I also chose to run for chair of my Democratic legislative district. I'll talk about the details about that later, but suffice to say that I won, and the experience since has been eye-opening.
The second revelationary event was just in the past week regarding my relationship with Yamaarashi-chan. I won't be going into details about it in my public blog, but suffice to say that the event was very positive. Not to say that there won't be difficulties to come, but many issues I have had have been dealt with and put to bed, and roads of relationship cleared.
I'll be making some more posts in the next few days...I'm going to try to post at least once every other day. We'll see how that works.
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