Jokes.
Q: What do you call a sad coffee?
A: Depresso.
Anonymous
973
402
A panda walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food!" The panda yells back, "Hey man, I'm a panda. Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary to panda, "A tree climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats, shoots, and leaves."
chinie
886
359
You've got your head so far up your ass you can chew your food twice.
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Pet Dog
A farmer named Patrick lived alone in the Irish countryside with his pet dog. The dog finally died and Patrick went to the parish priest, saying "Father, my dog died. Could you possibly be saying a Mass for the poor creature?" Father Donald told the farmer "No, we can't have services for an animal in the church, but I'll tell you what, there's a new denomination down the road, and no telling what they believe in, but maybe they'll do something for the animal." Patrick said "I'll go right now. By the way, do you think $100,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Patrick replied "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic."
source: http://www.jokes4us.com/ethnicjokes/random/ethnic410.html
A: Depresso.
Anonymous
973
402
A panda walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food!" The panda yells back, "Hey man, I'm a panda. Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary to panda, "A tree climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats, shoots, and leaves."
chinie
886
359
You've got your head so far up your ass you can chew your food twice.
*********
Pet Dog
A farmer named Patrick lived alone in the Irish countryside with his pet dog. The dog finally died and Patrick went to the parish priest, saying "Father, my dog died. Could you possibly be saying a Mass for the poor creature?" Father Donald told the farmer "No, we can't have services for an animal in the church, but I'll tell you what, there's a new denomination down the road, and no telling what they believe in, but maybe they'll do something for the animal." Patrick said "I'll go right now. By the way, do you think $100,000 is enough to donate for the service?" Father Patrick replied "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic."
source: http://www.jokes4us.com/ethnicjokes/random/ethnic410.html