(no subject)
Found out that my cousin died two days ago in a car crash :(((( He was my cousin once removed, so we were not particularly close, but he did make drawings for me that I hung on the walls of my room here at school. Its really hard to look at them now, but also I'm a little grateful because I now appreciate them that much more. He had just gotten married and I think his wife had either been expecting their first child or gave birth not too long ago. He was only maybe 5 years older than me. The worst part of it all is that my family is not at all that big, but we only found out about his death THREE. DAYS. LATER. What the fuck, y'all, this is my family we are talking about!! I should know this stuff maybe the very next day, not a couple days later!! We are just so far from the rest of us ... so much separates us, not just the distance or the time difference. I am always so jealous of anyone who can see their extended family at will! I haven't seen my grandmother since my senior year of high school, which was three years ago. I haven't seen Alesha (my cousin) since we moved to the States ... this isn't fair ... I want to be with my family again! They say home is where the heart is, and I always knew my home was here, but now my heart is with my family and I need to be with them.