"This will be hilarious in.....RIGHT NOW."
There are four episodes left in season three for me. I'm watching them tonight. Let me put this in perspective for you; I started this season Sunday night. I blew through forty eight episodes in five nights.
My commentary is barely even comprehensible. I think my brain cracked in half at some point. There's no going back now. I am married to this show, in all its eldritch wonderful horribleness.
space dolphin!
the boys are contemplating their new Upperclassmen status
cyrus is "just glad last year is behind us"
HAHA YOU'LL REGRET THOSE WORDS
BECAUSE THEY WILL BE HILARIOUS IN.....*RIGHT NOW*
oh god season three i am only just beginning to comprehend how many episodes i have watched and waited to get to this point
jaden is waving at invisible aliens
"You know, I could sit here and have flashbacks all day!"
oh god yes
the meta
it had better get more meta
"When your friend goes nuts, it's best just to play along." OH HASSLEBERRY.
man, by season three, even the show itself admits jaden is a fucking psycho
/SCREAM
/SCREAMSCREAMSCREAMSCREAMSCREAMSCREAMING
this screencap does not begin to do justice to the gayness
the loving pan in, pan out, camera swivel
the glances
the eyes
while the theme song blares WE'LL TAKE 'EM ON ~TOGETHER~
oh god i am so stoked
i am so ready
my body is ready
my body has been ready for one hundred plus episodes
space dolphin!
in non-shipping-related news, chazz's voice seems to have gotten *way* rougher and gravellier
STOP SMOKING THOSE CIGARS, CHAZZ
cyrus: "He's talking to himself again. I'm no therapist, but that can't be good." OH CYRUS.
IF ONLY THERE WERE ENOUGH THERAPISTS IN THE WORLD
TO HELP JADEN
this appears to be a mostly flashback/let's explain the previous season episode
Professor Thelonius Viper.... yeah, that's a positive-sounding name.
and by positive i mean "HE'S CLEARLY NOT A VILLAIN, YOU GUYS."
BeyondمليكBee
better than "McNasty"
space dolphin!
---hhhoashdoasdhsaladkal
ffffuck that was scary
why did the dub give yubel the voice of a five year old girl
that sounds like she was pulled right off the set of the Shining
/will not sleep
space dolphin!
OKAY NEW CHARACTERS LET'S ROLL
there is spiky red-hair guy
the dude with the crocodile
the One Black Character
who is male but tbh he *really* looks female to me
his name is Axel Brodie, though, and that's a pretty kicking BA name
so i forgive him
space dolphin!
HIS DUEL DISK IS A MACHINE GUN
which 4kids painted in colors so it looks harmless
man, i thought axel was a good guy! he seems pretty sinister atm
then again, first episode, things change
aster looked pretty formidable until you figured out he was an idiot
.......he's carrying a crocodile around
..............in his *hands*
suddenly cyrus is an obelisk blue!
meanwhile, jaden is having a strange nightmare about standing in a big wasteland with three suns glaring down, being creeped at by the voice of a reject from the set of every Creepy Child horror movie ever made
rejected on the grounds of *way too fucking scary*
jaden wakes up and decides to cut down on the drugs
aaaaaaah aaaaah oh my god johan is on screen
all time has stopped
for this magical moment
this moment i have waited aeons for
hee, johan's an inch or so taller
it is somehow adorable
actually EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM IS ADORABLE
aaaaah they are making eyes at each other
all the eyes ever made
jaden's like I BELIEVE IN MIRACLLLLLLLES
WHERE YOU FROM
YOU SEXY THANG
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLLLLLLLLES
SINCE YOU CAME ALONG~
YOU SEXY THAAAAANG
aaah and jaden's all "have we....met before?"
and johan's like "I FEEL THE SAME WAY *w*"
oh god so gay
the first rule of duel academy is "to resolve all conflicts by dueling." like, that's the actual rule.
blair just read it
SO MANY THINGS
ARE EXPLAINED
BY THIS
sheppard you said his name wrong
it's "johan" andersen
the j is soft
because, as should be obvious to anyone with half a brain, HE'S SCANDINAVIAN.
space dolphin!
and jaden realizes that hot kid he was talking to is a major duelist with a rare deck
his mind is silently screaming "JACK-MOTHERFUCKING-POT!!!!"
jaden is so bored by all this official garbage
he wants it to be over so he can get some alone time with johan
you know, to get acquainted with him
intimately
....
in *bed*
space dolphin!
Viper: hey, randomly i select the two of you to duel
jaden: THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER 8DDDDD
JIM WOLF-WHISTLES AT JADEN AND JOHAN WHILE THEY DUEL
hhahahahahaha oh my god it's so fucking canon
and it's the first episode they're even in
"This kid's as weird as Jaden!"
it's a match made in heaven
oh my god i can actually not stand how cute they are at each other
it is so cute
bedroom eyes
flames of passion
yeah, there's nothing untoward about this at all
meanwhile, professor viper plays with a lava lamp
space dolphin!
jaden: "Be gentle!"
OH MY GOD
OH MY GOD
YES
johan just played a field spell card that is essentially a gladiator arena with a rainbow in the background
why is there a rainbow in the background? because he's JOHAN MOTHERFUCKING ANDERSEN
"Something's not right about this." "What gave that away - the maniacal laugh, or the creepy music?"
oh this dub
why did i ever consider straying
aaaaaaaaaaah omg jaden and johan are like
the cutest things
that have ever been cute
in the history of cuteness
BeyondمليكBee
bwahahahaha DESTROY YOU ALL
space dolphin!
but they're SO CUTE OH MY GOD
they;re hanging out talking about cards
and geeking together
and being adorable at each other
i cannot even stand the power of their intense cuteness
i thought i was prepared for it BUT I WAS WRONG
space dolphin!
aaaaaaah literally twenty seconds in
and jaden and johan are MURDERING ME
WITH THEIR BLAZING CUTENESS
OH MY GOD THEY WENT SHOPPING FOR CARDS
AND THEY'RE OPENING THEM UP ON THE FLOOR
AND SQUEEING
next they will do each other's nails
oh my god the cuteness
i cannot handre it
i cannot
i will die
earthquakes
PLEASE DON'T DIE
YOU WILL MISS THE REST OF THE EPISODE
D8
space dolphin!
AAAAH I DON'T WANT TO MISS MORE OF THIS MAGNIFICENCE
someone ruined the slumber party by sneaking about outside
X( HOW DAR U
earthquakes
SO RUDE
space dolphin!
axel is so fucking hardcore
his duel disk is a gun and now he's meditating while hanging upside down from a tree
he is so fucking awesome
apparently he was a soldier in vietnam
so he's essentially black rambo with card games
that's how awesome axel is
man, johan, it's one thing to put your hand on someone's shoulder to comfort them, but it's another to leave it there
...possessively....
seriously the UST
so much of it
aaargh don't make me like Viper, dog, it won't end well
AAAH YUBEL /SCREAM
GET OUT YUBEL
jaden's imaginary friend is cheating on him to make him jealous
which would only work if he remembered he had an imaginary friend in the first place :V
johan, meanwhile, is beginning to figure out that jaden isn't the sharpest tack in the corkboard
but he
can't
heeeeeelp
falling in looooove with youuuuu
/A-teens moment
sheppard is ridiculously good at fucking things up really horribly, isn't he? i mean, season one was unequivocally his fault
and now he's aiding the first-round villain of season three by sitting on his ass
|D
man, WHY DOESN'T ANYONE LISTEN TO CYRUS
HE IS THE ONLY GENRE-SAVVY MEMBER OF THIS GROUP
but jaden is too busy flirting with johan to listen
STOP THINKING WITH THE WRONG HEAD, JADEN
Anzila86
Worst. Principle. Ever
space dolphin!
he is so terrible
Anzila86
Seriously, i work in education, and the guy would be fired from any reasonable school
space dolphin!
that gives me hope for reasonable schools, at least
ahahahaha oh my god johan is JUST AS MUCH OF A SLUT AS JADEN
they will have such a problem with monogamy
ahahaha oh god now i want to write fic
where neither of them is capable of not banging people who are not each other
.....way too many double negatives BUT YOU GET ME
in fact, they will intentionally cheat on each other purely for an excuse to have make-up sex
but he's all creeping up on hassleberry asking to see his cards
~winding~ a hand around his shoulders
oh my god these two
johan, you are so helpful
cyrus is literally hanging over a cliff to his doom, and you are staring at jaden
mooning over him
and how he saves the world so much
BeyondمليكBee
pfffft
space dolphin!
very helpful to cyrus' continued existence, man
BeyondمليكBee
Cyrus is SO LAST SEASON.
space dolphin!
i love cyrus ;;
BeyondمليكBee
i am kidding, Random *giggles*
space dolphin!
XD but johan is pretty superior to any characters who are not atticus
space dolphin!
JADEN IS LAUGHING LIKE A CRAZY
WHILE CYRUS NEARLY FALLS TO HIS DOOM
I
I DON'T EVEN
BeyondمليكBee
PFFT. wonderful friend
space dolphin!
THIS KID MAKES LULU LOOK SANE AND WELL-ADJUSTED
BeyondمليكBee
and somehow everyone wants to marry him
space dolphin!
because he's got a sweet ass i guess :V
BeyondمليكBee
PFFFFFFT
i think its the kuriboh cut to be honest. and the mad rapper skillz
space dolphin!
i maintain that it has to be his sweet ass
CYRUS PASSIONATELY DECLARES HIS LOVE!
jaden falls asleep
BeyondمليكBee
..................................ouch
space dolphin!
poor kid
BeyondمليكBee
seriously
jaden: "THIS IS NO TIME TO START SPEAKING AUSTRALIAN, JIM!" oh, jaden, your vocabulary needs work |D
this in response to the word "stimuli"
BeyondمليكBee
*dies*
space dolphin!
and now hassleberry's DINOSAUR DNA is acting up.
/crying softly
"He wouldn't eatcha! The worst thing he'd do is tear you to shreds!" Oh, jim, so cheerful
and jaden and johan are equally turned on by this duel
cyrus is talking in tropes. i think his glasses have the power to see past the fourth wall
I'M JUST THE SIDEKICK; *OBVIOUSLY* I CAN'T ADVANCE THE PLOT
the slifers decide to have a slumber party, and the first thing jaden and johan do is put their arms around each other
I DON'T THINK THEY PLAN ON MUCH SLUMBERING YOU GUYS
BeyondمليكBee
XDDDDDD
Anzila86
Well, Jaden does have his rough 22 hour sleep schedule to maintain
space dolphin!
"There's only room for one spoiled rich kid at this school, and that's me!"
"Who cares if he's richer and more powerful? I'M REALLY GOOD AT CARD GAMES! AND THAT'S ALL THAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT IN LIFE ANYWAY!"
oh my god this dub
LK wrote it
there is no way he didn't
BeyondمليكBee
SOUNDS LIKE IT
space dolphin!
lmao adrian is both a genius and a douchebag
viper turns up the evil energy-draining system to maximum to kill him, so adrian organizes an impromptu tourney
figuring that if he's going down, so's the entire school
"IT'S TIME FOR A MAKEOVER!" "What's that supposed to mean?" "...Not sure."
"THE SOONER WE START DUELING, THE LESS BAD DIALOGUE I HAVE TO HEAR."
Anzila86
actually, he did it because he knew that the system would spread the damage out
meaning there was a good chance it wouldn't kill anyone, probably
/skips most of the chazz/adrian duel because these two are exceedingly boring
and the duel appears to be weather-themed
and i am getting sick of these awful puns
GET TO THE PART WITH THE ALTERNATE UNIVERSE AND THE KILLING OF BITCHES
BeyondمليكBee
"YOU DON'T STAND A CLOUD OF A CHANCE"
Anzila86
...ouch. That makes the ghost puns seem cutting
or should I say, Haunting?
space dolphin!
OUCH
Anzila86
Sorry, I get spirited about puns
they'll be the death of me
space dolphin!
XDDDD
SOMEONE THREW AN ACTUAL PUNCH IN YU GI OH
IT WASN'T A CARD, IT WAS A FIST
THAT WAS THROWN
MY MIND IS BLOWN
BY THE PUNCH THAT WAS THROWN
OH MY GOD
BeyondمليكBee
hey...joey punches yami in season...i think that was 3?
space dolphin!
it must be a season 3 thing
Anzila86
Actually Joey and Tristian beat up people all the time
in fact, in one of the side stories Joey jokes about how he's almost forgotten what its like to beat people up with fists instead of cards
space dolphin!
interesting!
Anzila86
It's actually kind of Tristian's role in the Japanese version, he's the muscle who beats people up
it's why he seems sorta useless in the dub
this guy is a deliberate parody of ben stein in ferris bueller's day off
adrian is such a badass
they're even playing an almost-cover of the mission impossible theme
aaaaaaand jaden's hearing voices again
not the nice ones, though
AND NOW A CROCODILE IS FIGHTING A TIGER
THIS SHOW IS SO HARDCORE
man, mr. stein, you think jaden's a negative influence now, you haven't even seen him kill anybody in a homicidal rage yet
this is actually very well-executed foreshadowing
"How does it feel to be betrayed by every one of your monsters?"
"Ignorance and power are a deadly combination."
stein is actually hinting at further conflicts in jaden's character development
"I never asked to be a role model!" oh my god jaden is quoting the rap
ARE WE TO INFER THAT YOU DRINK AND DO DRUGS WHILE PLAYING CARD GAMES????
space dolphin!
YUGIOH
YOU IDIOTS
PEOPLE FLOAT IN WATER
IF THE WATER LEVEL RISES IN THAT PIT, ALEXIS WILL JUST FLOAT
IF JADEN KNEW BASIC PHYSICS, HE WOULD REALIZE THIS
space dolphin!
viper: "give in to your ~anger~ jaden"
he saw that on star wars
now viper is quoting scooby doo
is NOTHING SACRED TO THIS MAN
space dolphin!
stein's doing that thing again where he's foreshadowing the plot
"self-sacrifice. it's all about giving up a part of yourself in order to survive."
STEIN SERIOUSLY
DID YOU READ THE SCRIPT
"He who sits on high has the farthest to fall."
okay they totally are doing this on purpose
aaaaaah go away yubel
i changed my mind, you are too scary
i don't want to see you anymore
i liked it when i could sleep at night
BeyondمليكBee
is he really that scary?
space dolphin!
well, see, the dub gave hir the voice of a five-year-old girl who sounds like she was yanked off the set of the shining
*terrifying*
I CAME
TO THIS CITY
TO GIVE YOU A MESSAGE
*DOUBLE FUCKING RAINBOW ALL THE WAY*
BeyondمليكBee
XDDDDDD
oh my god they just don't stop touching each other
this is officially the "johan and jaden badtouching each other onscreen" plurk
i can't keep screencapping this, you guys
pegasus: "Go ahead, touch them and see if I'm right."
SO
INCREDIBLY
INSANELY!
(unsure)
SHANGHAI★ALICE
(unsure)
space dolphin!
and then he goes WITH GREAT CARDS COMES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY
☆tsuna-kun
(unsure)..................
BeyondمليكBee
You....you are kidding...yes?
space dolphin!
no.
BeyondمليكBee
*DIES*
Enabling-kun
......
My brain filled in the blank as to what he was referring to.
It was not cards.
I apologize.
/leaves this plurk
space dolphin!
no, it's okay
i plurked it for that very reason.
because it is so sketchy.
johan: "Allow me to dazzle you!"
I KNEW HE WAS TOO PERFECT
HE'S ACTUALLY A VAMPIRE!
Pensulliwen
RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN
osakaₒ
this is the skin of a killer :|
BeyondمليكBee
*DIES*
space dolphin!
this explains why he's the perfect manslut counterpart to jaden
why he's so magnificent in every way
etc. etc.
(=ﾟωﾟ)ﾉ
but does he sparkle?
space dolphin!
almost?
he could under certain circumstances?
space dolphin!
oh my god DNA doesn't work that way
holy shit axel is so fucking hardcore
he is the most hardcore person on this show
Anzila86
This show is actually powered by the spinning corpses of biologists
space dolphin!
XDDDDDDDDDDD
it's the UST that never eeeeeeends
yes it goes on and on my frieeeeeends
poor random
staaarted screencapping, not knowing what it was
and she'll be screencapping this show forever just because
it's the UST that never eeeeeeeeeends.....
sing along!
Anzila86
See, this is why if i ever get a rainbow dragon card, it can never go in the same deck as Neos
cause sparkles everywhere
space dolphin!
oh god all the sparkles
they would never stop sparkling
space dolphin!
lmao poor cyrus
"you know, I carried that water for three episodes, J."
that wasn't even a bomb. it was a card with a picture of a bomb. how did it explode. i. what.
adrian how do you not see the demonic eye staring at you from that tank
OH MY GOD KARATE FIGHT
IT'S NOT A CARD GAME IT'S A KARATE FIGHT
OH MY GOD
OOOOOOH MY GOD
I WAS NOT READY
I WAS NOT PREPARED MENTALLY FOR THIS
Anzila86
Kaiba hid small bombs in all duel monsters cards to make the experience more authentic
space dolphin!
omg i wish this were true
Anzila86
Knowing Kaiba it might be
the dude built a THEME PARK OF DEATH
complete with a serial killer, block falling mini game, and mercenaries with laser guns
space dolphin!
OH MY GOD AXEL BUSTS THROUGH THE ROOF
AND HOLDS THE DOORS
OH MY GOD THIS EPISODE IS SO HARDCORE
so yubel's living inside a lava lamp.... SECRETLY A HIPPIE?
:/aaaaa
Anzila86
No, just on drugs
space dolphin!
man, that is one intense lava lamp
aaaaaaaaaaaaaah crai
why is yubel the most terrifying thing that ever existed
this explains so much of why jaden is so fucked up
Anzila86
because she's every crazy ex ever dialed up to 11?
space dolphin!
he was imaginary friends with the kid from The Omen
space dolphin!
AAAAAAAAAAH OH MY GOD
I AM ACTUALLY SCREAMING SILENTLY
AAAAAH SOB
I WILL NEVER EVER SLEEP AGAIN
aaaah oh dear mother of god
/crying
/hiding under sheets
aaah yubel's creeping on adrian and i am crying because holy fuck
if i were a child
i would never
ever sleep again
man, nothing was preparing me for how much sheer High Octane Nightmare Fuel yubel is
i was foolish and overconfident
Anzila86
That will be terrifying in season 3-oh wait
space dolphin!
OH WAIT
Anzila86
Yeah, good luck with that. Have some complementary holy water, chalk, and salt
space dolphin!
i haven't internally screamed this much since i saw paranormal activity 2
that's right, viper. the talking arm from space told you it could resurrect your dead son. of course that makes sense. ARE YOU AN IDIOT.
/banging head on wall jfc
Anzila86
He's in Yugioh GX and his name isn't Alexis. The answer to that is yes
space dolphin!
graaaaaaaaaaah
man, where the hell are zane and atticus? i miss them
Anzila86
...>.>
space dolphin!
i don't know if i like that emote
Anzila86
*whistles innocently*
space dolphin!
THEY'RE IN BALI ON THEIR HONEYMOON, AREN'T THEY
Anzila86
Yes. Atticus was saddened that he couldn't get his sister a husband at the ceremony
space dolphin!
ah well. he tried.
yubel loses track of adrian due to mooning over jaden
there appears to be a lot of that in this season
QUICK I NEED TO DO THIS IMPORTANT PLOT THIN--oh hi jaden *___*
THEY ARE ACTUALLY CALLING JADEN OUT ON HIS SOCIOPATHY IN-SHOW
I THOUGHT IT WAS MY HILARIOUS ALTERNATE INTERPRETATION BUT I WAS WRONG
THEY INTENTIONALLY MADE HIM A SOCIOPATH ON PURPOSE
IT'S
CANON
WHAT
JUST WHAT.
this show, i cannot handle it
i cannot.
jaden: I....wait....no..... suddenly.... character crisis? but i....
WHAT IS THIS "EMPATHY" THING
WHY AM I FEELING IT
I DO NOT UNDERSTAAAAAND
oh wait and then he ignores it and screws the rules
Anzila86
Of course, he's the main character
space dolphin!
still, it was quite a moment
HDFSJFKHDSFUOHEWAIO /SCREEEEAAAAAAAAAAM
YUBEL JUST
JUST
OH MY GOD
YUBEL JUST RIPPED VIPER'S FACE OFF
CLEAN OFF
HIS FACE
HIS FAAAAAAAAAAAACE
OH MY
DHSKFHSIAOFWI
/SCREAMING FOREVER
Anzila86
She does that
and now everyone is in an alternate dimension
everyone is taking this pretty well
crowler and bonaparte are useless, so alexis comes up with a plan
because she is so fabulous
❥ ℬattycake ღ
oh wait, I did get this far
how did I forget Yubel
I must have repressed it or something loooool
space dolphin!
YOU PROBABLY REPRESSED YUB--lol
same thought
❥ ℬattycake ღ
braintwiiiiins
WAIT is it that thing. That was in that uh. TUBE OR SOME SUCH SHIT
space dolphin!
YEAH THE LAVA LAMP OF TERROR
❥ ℬattycake ღ
YEAH I vaguely remember it
it said it'd give him back his kid or something right?
don't remember if it killed him or not :|a
space dolphin!
IT LITERALLY RIPPED HIS FACE OFF
WITH ITS HAND
I WAS SHRIEKING ABOUT IT ONE PLURK AGO
❥ ℬattycake ღ
OH
DDDD:
space dolphin!
......oh my god bastion turned into a hermit in the woods
how did he get to the alternate dimension
oh, apparently he was working with eisenstein being a scientist this whole time, and there are 12 dimensions
an....interesting.... way of world-building i guess :V
❥ ℬattycake ღ
clearly the next stage of going nuts and running through campus mostly-naked is becoming a hermit in the woods 8D
space dolphin!
sounds...logical :/a
jaden tries to make a move on axel in the hospital and is rejected
axel is too badass for your silly seduction techniques
man, yubel, i don't know if adrian's gonna bite
he might be a little too genre savvy
space dolphin!
.........okay.
i think they were trying to convey that blair is feverish and moaning in her sleep
but it honestly
honestly looked
like she was just masturbating under the covers
(unsure) forever
SHANGHAI★ALICE
aw yeah
dat loli
well dude in fairness
she is horny as shit
i mean christ
space dolphin!
i know right
space dolphin!
oh my god scream
yubel just grew a duel disk on his arm
just *grew* one
/screaming into the desert
"Marcel, where did your accent go?" I'm glad someone else noticed this.
actually, the whole thing's pretty clever - you know Yubel's talking when Marcel's accent disappears
chazz how do you not see that this guy needs serious medical attention
ZOMBIES COMING UP THE HELL RIGHT NOW
SHOOT EM IN THE HEAD
SHOOT EM
GRAB THE SHOTGUN
4KIDS CENSORED IT! WHAT ARE YOU PRESSING SELECT FOR?
BITCH ZOMBIE'S IN THE ROOM
HIS AX IS ON *FIRE*
*HE KILLED YOUR PARENTS*
**SHOOT EM IN THE HEAD**
**SHOOT EM IN THE HEEEAAAAAAADDDDD**
space dolphin!
man, season three is objectively the greatest
we've got johan
yubel for terror points
alternate dimensions
meta dialogue
FUCKING ZOMBIES
and i haven't even gotten to the best moments
aaaaaaaaand blair is masturbating again
aaaaaaaand chazz is a zombie who is duel-horny specifically for jaden
aaaaaaaaaaaand what is this show even
space dolphin!
why is cyrus crying ;;
i hope he's not a zombie
but he couldn't cry if he was a zombie
okay good
AAAAAAAAAAAAH FUCK
DADIJSADHSIAL
FUCK NO HE REALLY WAS A ZOMBIE
YOU DOUCHEHOOOOOOOOOOOLES
oh my god why is this happening oh my god oh my god
oh my god this season
what the balls
what drugs
were they on
when they made
this season
aaaaaaaaah AAAAAAAAAAAH
AAAAAAAAAAAH THEY'RE IN THE LOCKERS
AAAAAAAAH WHAT THE CHRIST
/crying crying crying!
JADEN LISTEN TO ALEXIS
LISTEN TO HER
AND HER WISDOM
DON'T DUEL THE ZOMBIES
ah god this season
so much terror
so many emotions
mostly terror-based
lord of the rings reference? MY HEART
"They are not for eating!"
omg ;;
oh shit no not the library
THAT IS NOT A SAFE PLACE
/SHRIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEK
THEY'RE EATING HER
AND NOW THEY'RE GONNA EAT ME
OH
MY
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
jaden gets informed that his opponents - former classmates - have been tormented and twisted into grotesque fusions of man and monster
his line: "Whatevs."
like, no, that's literally what he says
he does not give a shit
|DDDDDDDDDDDD
THAT HAPPENS TO BE HILARIOUS IN THE PRESENT SEASON
BeyondمليكBee
oh Yu Gi Oh DMX.
space dolphin!
seriously oh my god
❥ ℬattycake ღ
/p-pets him. carefully
space dolphin!
oh i get it, these guys are themed around stock characters in Noh theater.
.../skips most of the dueling
--oh my god the plot devices from season one
UNEXPECTED
❥ ℬattycake ღ
THERE IS PLOT IN SEASON ONE???? /shot
space dolphin!
a bad one
❥ ℬattycake ღ
what's going on rofl
space dolphin!
marcel bonaparte (the annoying short guy's kid) is possessed by yubel
and there are a bunch of zombies because of viper's evil plan that never came to fruition because he got HIS FACE RIPPED OFF
and now yubel's looting the sacred beast cards
for..........some...........reason
❥ ℬattycake ღ
o.o
space dolphin!
what th--how did chazz get down there
lmao jaden is SO FRUSTRATED BY THIS PLOT
oh my god who wrote this season
if it took place in a world where death happened, oh my god the worst the worst the worst
AND THEN JADEN SET CHAZZ ON FIRE
OH MY GOD
WHAT
WHAT AM I WATCHING
WHAT IS THIS
THIS ISN'T A CHILDREN'S SHOW
I AM DOCTOR MOHINDER SURESH
AND THERE
WILL NEVER
BE
ENOUGH
QUESTIONS
space dolphin!
man what is it with chazz and getting forced into cults anyway
he has this thing i guess
oh look aster wants to be relevant
oh my god oh my god the rainbow dragon card is the only thing that can save them
MOTHERFUCKING RAINBOWS ALL UP IN THIS BITCH
❥ ℬattycake ღ
YAY RAINBOW DRAGON
INTERDIMENSIONAL DUEL SYSTEM
GO NOW! UND GET J'YOUR GAME ON!
lmao german accents
❥ ℬattycake ღ
/lols at imagining this
space dolphin!
DUN DUN DUN ADRIAN IS ACTUALLY A VILLAIN
NOT THAT IT WASN'T A LITTLE OBVIOUS
well, i don't know, he's less "a villain" and more "a selfish bastard"
space dolphin!
SHE'S BOOBY-TRAPPED THE PERIMETER WITH TRAP CARDS
WITH TRAP CARDS
WITH *TRAP CARDS*
CARDS TRAP WITH TRAP WITH CARDS TRAP CARDS WITH TRAKLSDCADAREAWIHIRSJAEWA
cyrus is humping jaden's leg
jaden why didn't you get him fixed
you need to be more responsible
BeyondمليكBee
...like...literally?
space dolphin!
basically
BeyondمليكBee
wow.
....is jaden like...cat nip or something?
space dolphin!
to be fair, he's a zombie right now
but.... (unsure)
space dolphin!
man, if adrian's personality weren't so flat and dickish, i'd say he was an interesting character
certainly his motivations SHOULD make him sympathetic
but... he's just so unlikeable
ah but his and echo's relationship is pretty awesome
Anzila86
From what I hear he was pretty compelling in the original version. What with all his brother issues
space dolphin!
even his past isn't helping me like him, and that's saying something
Anzila86
Did you get to the part where he dedicated his life to his adopted little brother?
space dolphin!
yeah! and still nothing! i mean, it's sad, but there is nothing about his personality that is making me like him!
it's weird, man, idk why i cant like him
Anzila86
Maybe it's a voice thing
space dolphin!
possible...
SQUEAL ZANE
ZANE ZANE ZANE WHERE WERE YOU
I MIIIIISSED YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
;33333333333333333;
oh my god zane and johan are dueling BETWEEN DIMENSIONS
dalsajakfljsldfjsal /rolling around
yubel: "So Jaden's going to save the world again? Too bad. Because the only one who's going to need saving...is him!"
yubel stop spoiling the plot
bad enough when stein was doing it
unf unf unf unf unf zane
i almost forgot how fucking hot you are
THEY'RE SHOOTING THE RAINBOW DRAGON CARD THROUGH A STARGATE WITH A MISSILE
man it's a shame jaden is missing this duel
space dolphin!
time to watch jaden duel yubel
aww yissss
yubel, no.
you did not find yourself deep beneath the earth's crust
because you would have been in the mantle
where you would have been crushed/toasted to death
just no.
aaaaaaah jaden don't look sad D:
you know i hate it when you look sad
blair: "You can't blame yourself, Jaden!" jaden: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
oh my lord every time they say "rainbow dragon" with a straight face, i crack up
and let me tell you, they JUST KEEP SAYING IT
alexis doesn't even say anything, she just kicks ass
OH MY GOD THE GUN SHOOTS FLAMING CARDS OH MY GOD
AND THEN HASSLEBERRY HIT EVERYONE WITH A METEOR
oh and i just went to wikipedia. turns out i was wrong about the rolo's VA being marcel!yubel thing
somewhat comforted?
yubel, seriously, just TELL HIM.
he doesn't remember, hun
space dolphin!
"I'M OUTTA CARD AMMO"
oh my god axel so fabulous
DOUBLE RAINBOW DRAGON ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE SKY
YEAH YEAH SO INTENSE
yubel y u so creepy
jaden, don't flaunt your new boytoy in front of yubel. baaaaaaaaaaad idea.
gdit they are just unable to keep from touching each other
it's like they have magnets in their hands
they just won't stop
and yubel's just like >CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
OH GDSI
DFSUAF
"MIND IF I JOIN THIS DUEL?"
oh my god johan literally just butts in
he's like IT'S OKAY, THREESOMES ARE COOL
johan is just as much of a sociopath as jaden! IT'S LIKE THEY WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER.
jaden: RAINBOWS SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
BeyondمليكBee
Pfft. you're ready for your parade, jaden
space dolphin!
jaden and johan are made entirely of rainbows
❥ ℬattycake ღ
Johan and Jaden are like clones
space dolphin!
they are THE CUTEST THINGS TO EXIST
yubel: >C
ten thousand points of damage? totally overkill
aaaaaaand there's yubel
TINY JADEN
so, yubel actually bears a lot of similarities to spiritofthering!Bakura
in that ze would knock people into comas if ze thought they were a threat to hir host
i still haven't figured out what pronouns to use with yubel yet :/
SERIOUSLY THOUGH, THE 5-YEAR-OLD GIRL VOICE WAS A HORRIBLE DUBBING CHOICE
ABSOLUTELY AWFUL
NOOOOOOO JOHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
BeyondمليكBee
he come out of the straight closet?
space dolphin!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE CAN'T NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
DON'T STAY IN THE OTHER UNIVERSE TO LET EVERYONE GET HOME SAFE
DON'T SACRIFICE YOURSELF
DON'T LEAVE THE SHOW
HOW DO I LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE WITHOUT YOUUUUUUUUUU :'-(
BeyondمليكBee
*dies* oh random
*holds*
space dolphin!
aaaaaaaaah jaden ;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:
aaaaaah he's so saaaaaaaad aaaaaaaaaaaaah
aaaaah i can't stand it ;~~~~~~~~~;
BeyondمليكBee
....jaden is actually sad?
space dolphin!
he is devastated
he lost his other half
Anzila86
I probably shouldn't point out that if Johan had stayed out of the duel Jaden would have won anyway >.>
space dolphin!
...../facepalm
OH JOHAN
Anzila86
Hero complexes, gotta love 'em
NEXT TIME: Season Three, Part Two, a.k.a. "in which Random cries all the tears that were ever wept."
My commentary is barely even comprehensible. I think my brain cracked in half at some point. There's no going back now. I am married to this show, in all its eldritch wonderful horribleness.
space dolphin!
the boys are contemplating their new Upperclassmen status
cyrus is "just glad last year is behind us"
HAHA YOU'LL REGRET THOSE WORDS
BECAUSE THEY WILL BE HILARIOUS IN.....*RIGHT NOW*
oh god season three i am only just beginning to comprehend how many episodes i have watched and waited to get to this point
jaden is waving at invisible aliens
"You know, I could sit here and have flashbacks all day!"
oh god yes
the meta
it had better get more meta
"When your friend goes nuts, it's best just to play along." OH HASSLEBERRY.
man, by season three, even the show itself admits jaden is a fucking psycho
/SCREAM
/SCREAMSCREAMSCREAMSCREAMSCREAMSCREAMING
this screencap does not begin to do justice to the gayness
the loving pan in, pan out, camera swivel
the glances
the eyes
while the theme song blares WE'LL TAKE 'EM ON ~TOGETHER~
oh god i am so stoked
i am so ready
my body is ready
my body has been ready for one hundred plus episodes
space dolphin!
in non-shipping-related news, chazz's voice seems to have gotten *way* rougher and gravellier
STOP SMOKING THOSE CIGARS, CHAZZ
cyrus: "He's talking to himself again. I'm no therapist, but that can't be good." OH CYRUS.
IF ONLY THERE WERE ENOUGH THERAPISTS IN THE WORLD
TO HELP JADEN
this appears to be a mostly flashback/let's explain the previous season episode
Professor Thelonius Viper.... yeah, that's a positive-sounding name.
and by positive i mean "HE'S CLEARLY NOT A VILLAIN, YOU GUYS."
BeyondمليكBee
better than "McNasty"
space dolphin!
---hhhoashdoasdhsaladkal
ffffuck that was scary
why did the dub give yubel the voice of a five year old girl
that sounds like she was pulled right off the set of the Shining
/will not sleep
space dolphin!
OKAY NEW CHARACTERS LET'S ROLL
there is spiky red-hair guy
the dude with the crocodile
the One Black Character
who is male but tbh he *really* looks female to me
his name is Axel Brodie, though, and that's a pretty kicking BA name
so i forgive him
space dolphin!
HIS DUEL DISK IS A MACHINE GUN
which 4kids painted in colors so it looks harmless
man, i thought axel was a good guy! he seems pretty sinister atm
then again, first episode, things change
aster looked pretty formidable until you figured out he was an idiot
.......he's carrying a crocodile around
..............in his *hands*
suddenly cyrus is an obelisk blue!
meanwhile, jaden is having a strange nightmare about standing in a big wasteland with three suns glaring down, being creeped at by the voice of a reject from the set of every Creepy Child horror movie ever made
rejected on the grounds of *way too fucking scary*
jaden wakes up and decides to cut down on the drugs
aaaaaaah aaaaah oh my god johan is on screen
all time has stopped
for this magical moment
this moment i have waited aeons for
hee, johan's an inch or so taller
it is somehow adorable
actually EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM IS ADORABLE
aaaaah they are making eyes at each other
all the eyes ever made
jaden's like I BELIEVE IN MIRACLLLLLLLES
WHERE YOU FROM
YOU SEXY THANG
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLLLLLLLLES
SINCE YOU CAME ALONG~
YOU SEXY THAAAAANG
aaah and jaden's all "have we....met before?"
and johan's like "I FEEL THE SAME WAY *w*"
oh god so gay
the first rule of duel academy is "to resolve all conflicts by dueling." like, that's the actual rule.
blair just read it
SO MANY THINGS
ARE EXPLAINED
BY THIS
sheppard you said his name wrong
it's "johan" andersen
the j is soft
because, as should be obvious to anyone with half a brain, HE'S SCANDINAVIAN.
space dolphin!
and jaden realizes that hot kid he was talking to is a major duelist with a rare deck
his mind is silently screaming "JACK-MOTHERFUCKING-POT!!!!"
jaden is so bored by all this official garbage
he wants it to be over so he can get some alone time with johan
you know, to get acquainted with him
intimately
....
in *bed*
space dolphin!
Viper: hey, randomly i select the two of you to duel
jaden: THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER 8DDDDD
JIM WOLF-WHISTLES AT JADEN AND JOHAN WHILE THEY DUEL
hhahahahahaha oh my god it's so fucking canon
and it's the first episode they're even in
"This kid's as weird as Jaden!"
it's a match made in heaven
oh my god i can actually not stand how cute they are at each other
it is so cute
bedroom eyes
flames of passion
yeah, there's nothing untoward about this at all
meanwhile, professor viper plays with a lava lamp
space dolphin!
jaden: "Be gentle!"
OH MY GOD
OH MY GOD
YES
johan just played a field spell card that is essentially a gladiator arena with a rainbow in the background
why is there a rainbow in the background? because he's JOHAN MOTHERFUCKING ANDERSEN
"Something's not right about this." "What gave that away - the maniacal laugh, or the creepy music?"
oh this dub
why did i ever consider straying
aaaaaaaaaaah omg jaden and johan are like
the cutest things
that have ever been cute
in the history of cuteness
BeyondمليكBee
bwahahahaha DESTROY YOU ALL
space dolphin!
but they're SO CUTE OH MY GOD
they;re hanging out talking about cards
and geeking together
and being adorable at each other
i cannot even stand the power of their intense cuteness
i thought i was prepared for it BUT I WAS WRONG
space dolphin!
aaaaaaah literally twenty seconds in
and jaden and johan are MURDERING ME
WITH THEIR BLAZING CUTENESS
OH MY GOD THEY WENT SHOPPING FOR CARDS
AND THEY'RE OPENING THEM UP ON THE FLOOR
AND SQUEEING
next they will do each other's nails
oh my god the cuteness
i cannot handre it
i cannot
i will die
earthquakes
PLEASE DON'T DIE
YOU WILL MISS THE REST OF THE EPISODE
D8
space dolphin!
AAAAH I DON'T WANT TO MISS MORE OF THIS MAGNIFICENCE
someone ruined the slumber party by sneaking about outside
X( HOW DAR U
earthquakes
SO RUDE
space dolphin!
axel is so fucking hardcore
his duel disk is a gun and now he's meditating while hanging upside down from a tree
he is so fucking awesome
apparently he was a soldier in vietnam
so he's essentially black rambo with card games
that's how awesome axel is
man, johan, it's one thing to put your hand on someone's shoulder to comfort them, but it's another to leave it there
...possessively....
seriously the UST
so much of it
aaargh don't make me like Viper, dog, it won't end well
AAAH YUBEL /SCREAM
GET OUT YUBEL
jaden's imaginary friend is cheating on him to make him jealous
which would only work if he remembered he had an imaginary friend in the first place :V
johan, meanwhile, is beginning to figure out that jaden isn't the sharpest tack in the corkboard
but he
can't
heeeeeelp
falling in looooove with youuuuu
/A-teens moment
sheppard is ridiculously good at fucking things up really horribly, isn't he? i mean, season one was unequivocally his fault
and now he's aiding the first-round villain of season three by sitting on his ass
|D
man, WHY DOESN'T ANYONE LISTEN TO CYRUS
HE IS THE ONLY GENRE-SAVVY MEMBER OF THIS GROUP
but jaden is too busy flirting with johan to listen
STOP THINKING WITH THE WRONG HEAD, JADEN
Anzila86
Worst. Principle. Ever
space dolphin!
he is so terrible
Anzila86
Seriously, i work in education, and the guy would be fired from any reasonable school
space dolphin!
that gives me hope for reasonable schools, at least
ahahahaha oh my god johan is JUST AS MUCH OF A SLUT AS JADEN
they will have such a problem with monogamy
ahahaha oh god now i want to write fic
where neither of them is capable of not banging people who are not each other
.....way too many double negatives BUT YOU GET ME
in fact, they will intentionally cheat on each other purely for an excuse to have make-up sex
but he's all creeping up on hassleberry asking to see his cards
~winding~ a hand around his shoulders
oh my god these two
johan, you are so helpful
cyrus is literally hanging over a cliff to his doom, and you are staring at jaden
mooning over him
and how he saves the world so much
BeyondمليكBee
pfffft
space dolphin!
very helpful to cyrus' continued existence, man
BeyondمليكBee
Cyrus is SO LAST SEASON.
space dolphin!
i love cyrus ;;
BeyondمليكBee
i am kidding, Random *giggles*
space dolphin!
XD but johan is pretty superior to any characters who are not atticus
space dolphin!
JADEN IS LAUGHING LIKE A CRAZY
WHILE CYRUS NEARLY FALLS TO HIS DOOM
I
I DON'T EVEN
BeyondمليكBee
PFFT. wonderful friend
space dolphin!
THIS KID MAKES LULU LOOK SANE AND WELL-ADJUSTED
BeyondمليكBee
and somehow everyone wants to marry him
space dolphin!
because he's got a sweet ass i guess :V
BeyondمليكBee
PFFFFFFT
i think its the kuriboh cut to be honest. and the mad rapper skillz
space dolphin!
i maintain that it has to be his sweet ass
CYRUS PASSIONATELY DECLARES HIS LOVE!
jaden falls asleep
BeyondمليكBee
..................................ouch
space dolphin!
poor kid
BeyondمليكBee
seriously
jaden: "THIS IS NO TIME TO START SPEAKING AUSTRALIAN, JIM!" oh, jaden, your vocabulary needs work |D
this in response to the word "stimuli"
BeyondمليكBee
*dies*
space dolphin!
and now hassleberry's DINOSAUR DNA is acting up.
/crying softly
"He wouldn't eatcha! The worst thing he'd do is tear you to shreds!" Oh, jim, so cheerful
and jaden and johan are equally turned on by this duel
cyrus is talking in tropes. i think his glasses have the power to see past the fourth wall
I'M JUST THE SIDEKICK; *OBVIOUSLY* I CAN'T ADVANCE THE PLOT
the slifers decide to have a slumber party, and the first thing jaden and johan do is put their arms around each other
I DON'T THINK THEY PLAN ON MUCH SLUMBERING YOU GUYS
BeyondمليكBee
XDDDDDD
Anzila86
Well, Jaden does have his rough 22 hour sleep schedule to maintain
space dolphin!
"There's only room for one spoiled rich kid at this school, and that's me!"
"Who cares if he's richer and more powerful? I'M REALLY GOOD AT CARD GAMES! AND THAT'S ALL THAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT IN LIFE ANYWAY!"
oh my god this dub
LK wrote it
there is no way he didn't
BeyondمليكBee
SOUNDS LIKE IT
space dolphin!
lmao adrian is both a genius and a douchebag
viper turns up the evil energy-draining system to maximum to kill him, so adrian organizes an impromptu tourney
figuring that if he's going down, so's the entire school
"IT'S TIME FOR A MAKEOVER!" "What's that supposed to mean?" "...Not sure."
"THE SOONER WE START DUELING, THE LESS BAD DIALOGUE I HAVE TO HEAR."
Anzila86
actually, he did it because he knew that the system would spread the damage out
meaning there was a good chance it wouldn't kill anyone, probably
/skips most of the chazz/adrian duel because these two are exceedingly boring
and the duel appears to be weather-themed
and i am getting sick of these awful puns
GET TO THE PART WITH THE ALTERNATE UNIVERSE AND THE KILLING OF BITCHES
BeyondمليكBee
"YOU DON'T STAND A CLOUD OF A CHANCE"
Anzila86
...ouch. That makes the ghost puns seem cutting
or should I say, Haunting?
space dolphin!
OUCH
Anzila86
Sorry, I get spirited about puns
they'll be the death of me
space dolphin!
XDDDD
SOMEONE THREW AN ACTUAL PUNCH IN YU GI OH
IT WASN'T A CARD, IT WAS A FIST
THAT WAS THROWN
MY MIND IS BLOWN
BY THE PUNCH THAT WAS THROWN
OH MY GOD
BeyondمليكBee
hey...joey punches yami in season...i think that was 3?
space dolphin!
it must be a season 3 thing
Anzila86
Actually Joey and Tristian beat up people all the time
in fact, in one of the side stories Joey jokes about how he's almost forgotten what its like to beat people up with fists instead of cards
space dolphin!
interesting!
Anzila86
It's actually kind of Tristian's role in the Japanese version, he's the muscle who beats people up
it's why he seems sorta useless in the dub
this guy is a deliberate parody of ben stein in ferris bueller's day off
adrian is such a badass
they're even playing an almost-cover of the mission impossible theme
aaaaaaand jaden's hearing voices again
not the nice ones, though
AND NOW A CROCODILE IS FIGHTING A TIGER
THIS SHOW IS SO HARDCORE
man, mr. stein, you think jaden's a negative influence now, you haven't even seen him kill anybody in a homicidal rage yet
this is actually very well-executed foreshadowing
"How does it feel to be betrayed by every one of your monsters?"
"Ignorance and power are a deadly combination."
stein is actually hinting at further conflicts in jaden's character development
"I never asked to be a role model!" oh my god jaden is quoting the rap
ARE WE TO INFER THAT YOU DRINK AND DO DRUGS WHILE PLAYING CARD GAMES????
space dolphin!
YUGIOH
YOU IDIOTS
PEOPLE FLOAT IN WATER
IF THE WATER LEVEL RISES IN THAT PIT, ALEXIS WILL JUST FLOAT
IF JADEN KNEW BASIC PHYSICS, HE WOULD REALIZE THIS
space dolphin!
viper: "give in to your ~anger~ jaden"
he saw that on star wars
now viper is quoting scooby doo
is NOTHING SACRED TO THIS MAN
space dolphin!
stein's doing that thing again where he's foreshadowing the plot
"self-sacrifice. it's all about giving up a part of yourself in order to survive."
STEIN SERIOUSLY
DID YOU READ THE SCRIPT
"He who sits on high has the farthest to fall."
okay they totally are doing this on purpose
aaaaaah go away yubel
i changed my mind, you are too scary
i don't want to see you anymore
i liked it when i could sleep at night
BeyondمليكBee
is he really that scary?
space dolphin!
well, see, the dub gave hir the voice of a five-year-old girl who sounds like she was yanked off the set of the shining
*terrifying*
I CAME
TO THIS CITY
TO GIVE YOU A MESSAGE
*DOUBLE FUCKING RAINBOW ALL THE WAY*
BeyondمليكBee
XDDDDDD
oh my god they just don't stop touching each other
this is officially the "johan and jaden badtouching each other onscreen" plurk
i can't keep screencapping this, you guys
pegasus: "Go ahead, touch them and see if I'm right."
SO
INCREDIBLY
INSANELY!
(unsure)
SHANGHAI★ALICE
(unsure)
space dolphin!
and then he goes WITH GREAT CARDS COMES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY
☆tsuna-kun
(unsure)..................
BeyondمليكBee
You....you are kidding...yes?
space dolphin!
no.
BeyondمليكBee
*DIES*
Enabling-kun
......
My brain filled in the blank as to what he was referring to.
It was not cards.
I apologize.
/leaves this plurk
space dolphin!
no, it's okay
i plurked it for that very reason.
because it is so sketchy.
johan: "Allow me to dazzle you!"
I KNEW HE WAS TOO PERFECT
HE'S ACTUALLY A VAMPIRE!
Pensulliwen
RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN
osakaₒ
this is the skin of a killer :|
BeyondمليكBee
*DIES*
space dolphin!
this explains why he's the perfect manslut counterpart to jaden
why he's so magnificent in every way
etc. etc.
(=ﾟωﾟ)ﾉ
but does he sparkle?
space dolphin!
almost?
he could under certain circumstances?
space dolphin!
oh my god DNA doesn't work that way
holy shit axel is so fucking hardcore
he is the most hardcore person on this show
Anzila86
This show is actually powered by the spinning corpses of biologists
space dolphin!
XDDDDDDDDDDD
it's the UST that never eeeeeeends
yes it goes on and on my frieeeeeends
poor random
staaarted screencapping, not knowing what it was
and she'll be screencapping this show forever just because
it's the UST that never eeeeeeeeeends.....
sing along!
Anzila86
See, this is why if i ever get a rainbow dragon card, it can never go in the same deck as Neos
cause sparkles everywhere
space dolphin!
oh god all the sparkles
they would never stop sparkling
space dolphin!
lmao poor cyrus
"you know, I carried that water for three episodes, J."
that wasn't even a bomb. it was a card with a picture of a bomb. how did it explode. i. what.
adrian how do you not see the demonic eye staring at you from that tank
OH MY GOD KARATE FIGHT
IT'S NOT A CARD GAME IT'S A KARATE FIGHT
OH MY GOD
OOOOOOH MY GOD
I WAS NOT READY
I WAS NOT PREPARED MENTALLY FOR THIS
Anzila86
Kaiba hid small bombs in all duel monsters cards to make the experience more authentic
space dolphin!
omg i wish this were true
Anzila86
Knowing Kaiba it might be
the dude built a THEME PARK OF DEATH
complete with a serial killer, block falling mini game, and mercenaries with laser guns
space dolphin!
OH MY GOD AXEL BUSTS THROUGH THE ROOF
AND HOLDS THE DOORS
OH MY GOD THIS EPISODE IS SO HARDCORE
so yubel's living inside a lava lamp.... SECRETLY A HIPPIE?
:/aaaaa
Anzila86
No, just on drugs
space dolphin!
man, that is one intense lava lamp
aaaaaaaaaaaaaah crai
why is yubel the most terrifying thing that ever existed
this explains so much of why jaden is so fucked up
Anzila86
because she's every crazy ex ever dialed up to 11?
space dolphin!
he was imaginary friends with the kid from The Omen
space dolphin!
AAAAAAAAAAH OH MY GOD
I AM ACTUALLY SCREAMING SILENTLY
AAAAAH SOB
I WILL NEVER EVER SLEEP AGAIN
aaaah oh dear mother of god
/crying
/hiding under sheets
aaah yubel's creeping on adrian and i am crying because holy fuck
if i were a child
i would never
ever sleep again
man, nothing was preparing me for how much sheer High Octane Nightmare Fuel yubel is
i was foolish and overconfident
Anzila86
That will be terrifying in season 3-oh wait
space dolphin!
OH WAIT
Anzila86
Yeah, good luck with that. Have some complementary holy water, chalk, and salt
space dolphin!
i haven't internally screamed this much since i saw paranormal activity 2
that's right, viper. the talking arm from space told you it could resurrect your dead son. of course that makes sense. ARE YOU AN IDIOT.
/banging head on wall jfc
Anzila86
He's in Yugioh GX and his name isn't Alexis. The answer to that is yes
space dolphin!
graaaaaaaaaaah
man, where the hell are zane and atticus? i miss them
Anzila86
...>.>
space dolphin!
i don't know if i like that emote
Anzila86
*whistles innocently*
space dolphin!
THEY'RE IN BALI ON THEIR HONEYMOON, AREN'T THEY
Anzila86
Yes. Atticus was saddened that he couldn't get his sister a husband at the ceremony
space dolphin!
ah well. he tried.
yubel loses track of adrian due to mooning over jaden
there appears to be a lot of that in this season
QUICK I NEED TO DO THIS IMPORTANT PLOT THIN--oh hi jaden *___*
THEY ARE ACTUALLY CALLING JADEN OUT ON HIS SOCIOPATHY IN-SHOW
I THOUGHT IT WAS MY HILARIOUS ALTERNATE INTERPRETATION BUT I WAS WRONG
THEY INTENTIONALLY MADE HIM A SOCIOPATH ON PURPOSE
IT'S
CANON
WHAT
JUST WHAT.
this show, i cannot handle it
i cannot.
jaden: I....wait....no..... suddenly.... character crisis? but i....
WHAT IS THIS "EMPATHY" THING
WHY AM I FEELING IT
I DO NOT UNDERSTAAAAAND
oh wait and then he ignores it and screws the rules
Anzila86
Of course, he's the main character
space dolphin!
still, it was quite a moment
HDFSJFKHDSFUOHEWAIO /SCREEEEAAAAAAAAAAM
YUBEL JUST
JUST
OH MY GOD
YUBEL JUST RIPPED VIPER'S FACE OFF
CLEAN OFF
HIS FACE
HIS FAAAAAAAAAAAACE
OH MY
DHSKFHSIAOFWI
/SCREAMING FOREVER
Anzila86
She does that
and now everyone is in an alternate dimension
everyone is taking this pretty well
crowler and bonaparte are useless, so alexis comes up with a plan
because she is so fabulous
❥ ℬattycake ღ
oh wait, I did get this far
how did I forget Yubel
I must have repressed it or something loooool
space dolphin!
YOU PROBABLY REPRESSED YUB--lol
same thought
❥ ℬattycake ღ
braintwiiiiins
WAIT is it that thing. That was in that uh. TUBE OR SOME SUCH SHIT
space dolphin!
YEAH THE LAVA LAMP OF TERROR
❥ ℬattycake ღ
YEAH I vaguely remember it
it said it'd give him back his kid or something right?
don't remember if it killed him or not :|a
space dolphin!
IT LITERALLY RIPPED HIS FACE OFF
WITH ITS HAND
I WAS SHRIEKING ABOUT IT ONE PLURK AGO
❥ ℬattycake ღ
OH
DDDD:
space dolphin!
......oh my god bastion turned into a hermit in the woods
how did he get to the alternate dimension
oh, apparently he was working with eisenstein being a scientist this whole time, and there are 12 dimensions
an....interesting.... way of world-building i guess :V
❥ ℬattycake ღ
clearly the next stage of going nuts and running through campus mostly-naked is becoming a hermit in the woods 8D
space dolphin!
sounds...logical :/a
jaden tries to make a move on axel in the hospital and is rejected
axel is too badass for your silly seduction techniques
man, yubel, i don't know if adrian's gonna bite
he might be a little too genre savvy
space dolphin!
.........okay.
i think they were trying to convey that blair is feverish and moaning in her sleep
but it honestly
honestly looked
like she was just masturbating under the covers
(unsure) forever
SHANGHAI★ALICE
aw yeah
dat loli
well dude in fairness
she is horny as shit
i mean christ
space dolphin!
i know right
space dolphin!
oh my god scream
yubel just grew a duel disk on his arm
just *grew* one
/screaming into the desert
"Marcel, where did your accent go?" I'm glad someone else noticed this.
actually, the whole thing's pretty clever - you know Yubel's talking when Marcel's accent disappears
chazz how do you not see that this guy needs serious medical attention
ZOMBIES COMING UP THE HELL RIGHT NOW
SHOOT EM IN THE HEAD
SHOOT EM
GRAB THE SHOTGUN
4KIDS CENSORED IT! WHAT ARE YOU PRESSING SELECT FOR?
BITCH ZOMBIE'S IN THE ROOM
HIS AX IS ON *FIRE*
*HE KILLED YOUR PARENTS*
**SHOOT EM IN THE HEAD**
**SHOOT EM IN THE HEEEAAAAAAADDDDD**
space dolphin!
man, season three is objectively the greatest
we've got johan
yubel for terror points
alternate dimensions
meta dialogue
FUCKING ZOMBIES
and i haven't even gotten to the best moments
aaaaaaaaand blair is masturbating again
aaaaaaaand chazz is a zombie who is duel-horny specifically for jaden
aaaaaaaaaaaand what is this show even
space dolphin!
why is cyrus crying ;;
i hope he's not a zombie
but he couldn't cry if he was a zombie
okay good
AAAAAAAAAAAAH FUCK
DADIJSADHSIAL
FUCK NO HE REALLY WAS A ZOMBIE
YOU DOUCHEHOOOOOOOOOOOLES
oh my god why is this happening oh my god oh my god
oh my god this season
what the balls
what drugs
were they on
when they made
this season
aaaaaaaaah AAAAAAAAAAAH
AAAAAAAAAAAH THEY'RE IN THE LOCKERS
AAAAAAAAH WHAT THE CHRIST
/crying crying crying!
JADEN LISTEN TO ALEXIS
LISTEN TO HER
AND HER WISDOM
DON'T DUEL THE ZOMBIES
ah god this season
so much terror
so many emotions
mostly terror-based
lord of the rings reference? MY HEART
"They are not for eating!"
omg ;;
oh shit no not the library
THAT IS NOT A SAFE PLACE
/SHRIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEK
THEY'RE EATING HER
AND NOW THEY'RE GONNA EAT ME
OH
MY
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
jaden gets informed that his opponents - former classmates - have been tormented and twisted into grotesque fusions of man and monster
his line: "Whatevs."
like, no, that's literally what he says
he does not give a shit
|DDDDDDDDDDDD
THAT HAPPENS TO BE HILARIOUS IN THE PRESENT SEASON
BeyondمليكBee
oh Yu Gi Oh DMX.
space dolphin!
seriously oh my god
❥ ℬattycake ღ
/p-pets him. carefully
space dolphin!
oh i get it, these guys are themed around stock characters in Noh theater.
.../skips most of the dueling
--oh my god the plot devices from season one
UNEXPECTED
❥ ℬattycake ღ
THERE IS PLOT IN SEASON ONE???? /shot
space dolphin!
a bad one
❥ ℬattycake ღ
what's going on rofl
space dolphin!
marcel bonaparte (the annoying short guy's kid) is possessed by yubel
and there are a bunch of zombies because of viper's evil plan that never came to fruition because he got HIS FACE RIPPED OFF
and now yubel's looting the sacred beast cards
for..........some...........reason
❥ ℬattycake ღ
o.o
space dolphin!
what th--how did chazz get down there
lmao jaden is SO FRUSTRATED BY THIS PLOT
oh my god who wrote this season
if it took place in a world where death happened, oh my god the worst the worst the worst
AND THEN JADEN SET CHAZZ ON FIRE
OH MY GOD
WHAT
WHAT AM I WATCHING
WHAT IS THIS
THIS ISN'T A CHILDREN'S SHOW
I AM DOCTOR MOHINDER SURESH
AND THERE
WILL NEVER
BE
ENOUGH
QUESTIONS
space dolphin!
man what is it with chazz and getting forced into cults anyway
he has this thing i guess
oh look aster wants to be relevant
oh my god oh my god the rainbow dragon card is the only thing that can save them
MOTHERFUCKING RAINBOWS ALL UP IN THIS BITCH
❥ ℬattycake ღ
YAY RAINBOW DRAGON
INTERDIMENSIONAL DUEL SYSTEM
GO NOW! UND GET J'YOUR GAME ON!
lmao german accents
❥ ℬattycake ღ
/lols at imagining this
space dolphin!
DUN DUN DUN ADRIAN IS ACTUALLY A VILLAIN
NOT THAT IT WASN'T A LITTLE OBVIOUS
well, i don't know, he's less "a villain" and more "a selfish bastard"
space dolphin!
SHE'S BOOBY-TRAPPED THE PERIMETER WITH TRAP CARDS
WITH TRAP CARDS
WITH *TRAP CARDS*
CARDS TRAP WITH TRAP WITH CARDS TRAP CARDS WITH TRAKLSDCADAREAWIHIRSJAEWA
cyrus is humping jaden's leg
jaden why didn't you get him fixed
you need to be more responsible
BeyondمليكBee
...like...literally?
space dolphin!
basically
BeyondمليكBee
wow.
....is jaden like...cat nip or something?
space dolphin!
to be fair, he's a zombie right now
but.... (unsure)
space dolphin!
man, if adrian's personality weren't so flat and dickish, i'd say he was an interesting character
certainly his motivations SHOULD make him sympathetic
but... he's just so unlikeable
ah but his and echo's relationship is pretty awesome
Anzila86
From what I hear he was pretty compelling in the original version. What with all his brother issues
space dolphin!
even his past isn't helping me like him, and that's saying something
Anzila86
Did you get to the part where he dedicated his life to his adopted little brother?
space dolphin!
yeah! and still nothing! i mean, it's sad, but there is nothing about his personality that is making me like him!
it's weird, man, idk why i cant like him
Anzila86
Maybe it's a voice thing
space dolphin!
possible...
SQUEAL ZANE
ZANE ZANE ZANE WHERE WERE YOU
I MIIIIISSED YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
;33333333333333333;
oh my god zane and johan are dueling BETWEEN DIMENSIONS
dalsajakfljsldfjsal /rolling around
yubel: "So Jaden's going to save the world again? Too bad. Because the only one who's going to need saving...is him!"
yubel stop spoiling the plot
bad enough when stein was doing it
unf unf unf unf unf zane
i almost forgot how fucking hot you are
THEY'RE SHOOTING THE RAINBOW DRAGON CARD THROUGH A STARGATE WITH A MISSILE
man it's a shame jaden is missing this duel
space dolphin!
time to watch jaden duel yubel
aww yissss
yubel, no.
you did not find yourself deep beneath the earth's crust
because you would have been in the mantle
where you would have been crushed/toasted to death
just no.
aaaaaaah jaden don't look sad D:
you know i hate it when you look sad
blair: "You can't blame yourself, Jaden!" jaden: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
oh my lord every time they say "rainbow dragon" with a straight face, i crack up
and let me tell you, they JUST KEEP SAYING IT
alexis doesn't even say anything, she just kicks ass
OH MY GOD THE GUN SHOOTS FLAMING CARDS OH MY GOD
AND THEN HASSLEBERRY HIT EVERYONE WITH A METEOR
oh and i just went to wikipedia. turns out i was wrong about the rolo's VA being marcel!yubel thing
somewhat comforted?
yubel, seriously, just TELL HIM.
he doesn't remember, hun
space dolphin!
"I'M OUTTA CARD AMMO"
oh my god axel so fabulous
DOUBLE RAINBOW DRAGON ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE SKY
YEAH YEAH SO INTENSE
yubel y u so creepy
jaden, don't flaunt your new boytoy in front of yubel. baaaaaaaaaaad idea.
gdit they are just unable to keep from touching each other
it's like they have magnets in their hands
they just won't stop
and yubel's just like >CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC
OH GDSI
DFSUAF
"MIND IF I JOIN THIS DUEL?"
oh my god johan literally just butts in
he's like IT'S OKAY, THREESOMES ARE COOL
johan is just as much of a sociopath as jaden! IT'S LIKE THEY WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER.
jaden: RAINBOWS SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
BeyondمليكBee
Pfft. you're ready for your parade, jaden
space dolphin!
jaden and johan are made entirely of rainbows
❥ ℬattycake ღ
Johan and Jaden are like clones
space dolphin!
they are THE CUTEST THINGS TO EXIST
yubel: >C
ten thousand points of damage? totally overkill
aaaaaaand there's yubel
TINY JADEN
so, yubel actually bears a lot of similarities to spiritofthering!Bakura
in that ze would knock people into comas if ze thought they were a threat to hir host
i still haven't figured out what pronouns to use with yubel yet :/
SERIOUSLY THOUGH, THE 5-YEAR-OLD GIRL VOICE WAS A HORRIBLE DUBBING CHOICE
ABSOLUTELY AWFUL
NOOOOOOO JOHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN
BeyondمليكBee
he come out of the straight closet?
space dolphin!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE CAN'T NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
DON'T STAY IN THE OTHER UNIVERSE TO LET EVERYONE GET HOME SAFE
DON'T SACRIFICE YOURSELF
DON'T LEAVE THE SHOW
HOW DO I LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE WITHOUT YOUUUUUUUUUU :'-(
BeyondمليكBee
*dies* oh random
*holds*
space dolphin!
aaaaaaaaah jaden ;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~:
aaaaaah he's so saaaaaaaad aaaaaaaaaaaaah
aaaaah i can't stand it ;~~~~~~~~~;
BeyondمليكBee
....jaden is actually sad?
space dolphin!
he is devastated
he lost his other half
Anzila86
I probably shouldn't point out that if Johan had stayed out of the duel Jaden would have won anyway >.>
space dolphin!
...../facepalm
OH JOHAN
Anzila86
Hero complexes, gotta love 'em
NEXT TIME: Season Three, Part Two, a.k.a. "in which Random cries all the tears that were ever wept."