to bisou...is inhuman
You know... the french can be so damn 'indiscret'. They love posing tactless questions by phrasing it ever so cleverfully.... 'si c'est pas trop indiscret'. (if its not too indiscreet). It sort of leaves one hanging... do I answer;
'why yes, that is rather indiscreet, and I don't think I'm going to answer you'.
Or, do you just answer and feel a part of you die inside from that small morsel of your private life being exposed....and it's usually the kind of questions that you would only share with very close friends.
Damn people.
Cheek's first day of school was yesterday. As usual I found myself lost in the crowd of upper 30's to 50 year old parents as usual, and found myself feeling even more anti-social than normal after a summer of near solidad. I was in no mood to talk to people about what I had done this summer nor did I want to hear about theirs. Pretty pathetic, I know, but I really cannot talk to people these days.
I obviously had more courage today when I decided to exchange bisous, with a hesitant mother, that I barely know. Her daughter attended Kaylee's birthday party last year, she came with us one night to Cap Ferret, and Cheek has also spent a night at her house...all in one year. So there is a smidgen of a history. Although today when passing her and seeing her for the first time since last school year, she stopped, said 'bonjour', looked as though she wanted to bisou, started walking, saw that I stopped to give the bisou, stopped short as though to say, 'oh shit she wants to do the bisou too, and eventually gave in and did the damn bisous.
Seriously...WHAT was that all about. Some of these women treat me like I have 3 heads because I'm a. a damn young mother. (sorry guys, it happens and I ASSUMED) b. I still look fresh out of high school and have my 20 year old pre-baby body. or c. and the most likely.... I'm not one of them.... french.
Anyway, back on track... after that freakish incident, she asked me the classic question 'vous avez retourner CHEZ VOUS cet été?' (Did you go back home this summer?) Chez moi... I love it...
No, Kaylee did alone this time... I stayed here... CHEZ MOI.... then there's that classic 'oh'.
Lull.
So what did you all do this summer....? I had to hear about that... this is what I hate most about banal conversations.
Lull.
'T'as repris le boulot?' (did you start working again?) another classic... this question is almost as bad as the 'what are you going to do when you graduate' one. I have come up with a story that I tell everyone and am almost starting to believe myself.
'No not yet, the rectorat has a contract for me, but I can't start until possibly late october'
I figure that they don't know anything about the school board, so I just tell them things to make them happy....
'oh man that's annoying... so what are you going to do?'
'just wait until october'
Then comes the question...
'HOW ARE YOU DOING FINANCIALLY?'
Jaw drops.
Whoa there.... I didn't even get the decency of a 'sorry if this is completely tactless and none of my business'
I was so taken aback, that all I could say was 'chomage' as I shrugged, smiled, and played with the tie of my new René Derhy top (soldes of course), and left it at that.
She looked as though I had just landed from Mars....as though she was thinking - great, another foreigner draining the system making it tougher for us.
She simply responded; 'ah yeah, well... il faut faire quelque chose' (you gotta do something). I almost fell down in disbelief.
Seriously people... I REALLY don't know this woman, hell, I can't even think of her name.... can anyone, tell me what she is doing asking me a question like that? I mean it really pissed me off! I would NEVER in a MILLION YEARS ask someone that I barely knew that question. If they looked fine, were not wearing dirty clothes with holes in them and weren't going home to a cardboard box at night, I wouldn't question the situation! Does she honestly think that I would tell her the truth? How I barely make each month, how my boyfriend has been paying my bills all summer, how I use my american debit card regulary and get screwed on the exchange, how I still ask my parents for money...and so on.
I really just need to rant. I just really take issue with people who don't even take 2 seconds to REALLY get to know me, don't even try to make me feel like a human, even though their kids are playing with my kid, to ask me a question so forthright, so tasteless, and so personal.
I feel so invaded and I never want to see this woman again as long as I live. No wonder I choose to remain so closed and anti-social. These are the same kind of women who are ask me my age, just so they can do the math and figure out how old (or young) I was when I had Cheek. The same women that asked me if I had considered abortion. (this one was a real shocker!) The same fucking hags who ask me how I dealt with a child at eighteen. I've had it, never again will I be the one to approach these people, I don't care. I will remain the enigma, and I don't give a shit if I have friends or not. I'm tired of superficial people. I'm sick of seeing through everyone.
Next time, I'll just keep walking.
/end rant
'why yes, that is rather indiscreet, and I don't think I'm going to answer you'.
Or, do you just answer and feel a part of you die inside from that small morsel of your private life being exposed....and it's usually the kind of questions that you would only share with very close friends.
Damn people.
Cheek's first day of school was yesterday. As usual I found myself lost in the crowd of upper 30's to 50 year old parents as usual, and found myself feeling even more anti-social than normal after a summer of near solidad. I was in no mood to talk to people about what I had done this summer nor did I want to hear about theirs. Pretty pathetic, I know, but I really cannot talk to people these days.
I obviously had more courage today when I decided to exchange bisous, with a hesitant mother, that I barely know. Her daughter attended Kaylee's birthday party last year, she came with us one night to Cap Ferret, and Cheek has also spent a night at her house...all in one year. So there is a smidgen of a history. Although today when passing her and seeing her for the first time since last school year, she stopped, said 'bonjour', looked as though she wanted to bisou, started walking, saw that I stopped to give the bisou, stopped short as though to say, 'oh shit she wants to do the bisou too, and eventually gave in and did the damn bisous.
Seriously...WHAT was that all about. Some of these women treat me like I have 3 heads because I'm a. a damn young mother. (sorry guys, it happens and I ASSUMED) b. I still look fresh out of high school and have my 20 year old pre-baby body. or c. and the most likely.... I'm not one of them.... french.
Anyway, back on track... after that freakish incident, she asked me the classic question 'vous avez retourner CHEZ VOUS cet été?' (Did you go back home this summer?) Chez moi... I love it...
No, Kaylee did alone this time... I stayed here... CHEZ MOI.... then there's that classic 'oh'.
Lull.
So what did you all do this summer....? I had to hear about that... this is what I hate most about banal conversations.
Lull.
'T'as repris le boulot?' (did you start working again?) another classic... this question is almost as bad as the 'what are you going to do when you graduate' one. I have come up with a story that I tell everyone and am almost starting to believe myself.
'No not yet, the rectorat has a contract for me, but I can't start until possibly late october'
I figure that they don't know anything about the school board, so I just tell them things to make them happy....
'oh man that's annoying... so what are you going to do?'
'just wait until october'
Then comes the question...
'HOW ARE YOU DOING FINANCIALLY?'
Jaw drops.
Whoa there.... I didn't even get the decency of a 'sorry if this is completely tactless and none of my business'
I was so taken aback, that all I could say was 'chomage' as I shrugged, smiled, and played with the tie of my new René Derhy top (soldes of course), and left it at that.
She looked as though I had just landed from Mars....as though she was thinking - great, another foreigner draining the system making it tougher for us.
She simply responded; 'ah yeah, well... il faut faire quelque chose' (you gotta do something). I almost fell down in disbelief.
Seriously people... I REALLY don't know this woman, hell, I can't even think of her name.... can anyone, tell me what she is doing asking me a question like that? I mean it really pissed me off! I would NEVER in a MILLION YEARS ask someone that I barely knew that question. If they looked fine, were not wearing dirty clothes with holes in them and weren't going home to a cardboard box at night, I wouldn't question the situation! Does she honestly think that I would tell her the truth? How I barely make each month, how my boyfriend has been paying my bills all summer, how I use my american debit card regulary and get screwed on the exchange, how I still ask my parents for money...and so on.
I really just need to rant. I just really take issue with people who don't even take 2 seconds to REALLY get to know me, don't even try to make me feel like a human, even though their kids are playing with my kid, to ask me a question so forthright, so tasteless, and so personal.
I feel so invaded and I never want to see this woman again as long as I live. No wonder I choose to remain so closed and anti-social. These are the same kind of women who are ask me my age, just so they can do the math and figure out how old (or young) I was when I had Cheek. The same women that asked me if I had considered abortion. (this one was a real shocker!) The same fucking hags who ask me how I dealt with a child at eighteen. I've had it, never again will I be the one to approach these people, I don't care. I will remain the enigma, and I don't give a shit if I have friends or not. I'm tired of superficial people. I'm sick of seeing through everyone.
Next time, I'll just keep walking.
/end rant