(no subject)
December first is world aids day.
please.
help me.
this is so hard. i can't even begin to describe. the HARDEST it's ever been.
it's like one year later and i'm just beginning to mourn.
i need to find out more. NEED. but i learned some lifechanging things. which i will share.
when i'm okay.
but i got the GAP job, which equals dough. and i got a half today for only $40.
and thanks to the AIDS speakers which graced my school, i am much more appreciative for these two small life happenings.
there are so many "whys" i have. too many. but they are beginning to get answered.
and it's going to be hard. but i am insatiable right now. insatiable for information about my father.
RIP daddy.
you could have been okay.
"what if?" is the worst question ever. ever. ever.
think of one worse. there is not one.
so from now on i will carry on his legacy.
that is my GOAL.