what comes up has to come down
ups and downs.
UP!!!!so yes, i finally slept. its been about 6 months since a decent sleep. i have to say it feels veyr good to dream again with our worrying about being woken up. everything is weird, i feel rested, maby a little too rested
DOWN!!! i woke up at 5 and am bored shitless but im happy
UP!!!i went bowling with mike and andi yesterday
DOWN!!! i bowled like shit, iim so fucking mad andi had to keep a distance cause i was like a bomb
UP!!! i found more Toletum and Division 250 songs, they make the best covers ever and their songs alone stand untouchable.
DOWN!!! there is no down bitches, they believe in whats best for Spains so you get slapped if you dont like it.
UP!!! Bolivia is not splitting up and the riots have stopped, La Paz is getting food again and gas and the airports are running. We got rid of the president and hes not let back in Bolivia because he is not loved and sold our country out.
DOWN!!! the country is crippled and who knows how the new president will run it.
UP!!! Me and andi are back together after a day of being broken up.
DOWN!!! it was a terrifing day, its happenign quite often, i cant help but believe its my fault.
UP!!! CARNAGE KREW got the studio back!!!!, that menas we can play WHENEVER WE WANT, if i want to play as loud as my amp takes me at 3 in the mornign i can, if i want to have very very loud sex no one will bother me!!!! and we can pretty much do anything we want but light the place on fire.
DOWN!!! we need to get our shit together
so much going up and down got me kinda tired..... and horny
now for a peek in my head:
Latley i cant stop but think about people in my past, many i miss and want to talk to just cause they were good conversation and helped me or i helped them. Some i just wonder about, toher i just want to hug and let them knwo they changed my life. others are far gone in drugs. some have died in Guerrilla attacks in Colombia. some i cant help but wonder..... what the fuck happened. ive been seperated from loved ones and friends all my life, but the ones that hurt me the most are the ones that are no longer because we "grew up" and the ones that i had to leave. i miss so many people mostly the women, the guys can handle their own but the women i wan tto know are doing fine. i miss having that one friend of the opposite sex that i can talk to about anything. here..... i have no one, yes my girlfriend is my best friend but that leaves me no one to ask advice to.so heres a list of everyone i miss out side of the USA
El Salvador: Andrea Valenzuela
C.J. Rampone
Juan Carlos Sol
Adriana Gasteasoro
Colombia: Vytis
Manuela Carrillo
Lisa Bassil
Italia: Alenjandro "Mono" Melo (colombia)
Bolivia: Andres Justiniano "Grillo" or "Primo"
Milton Justiniano "Descansad en paz... "(R.I.P.)
i do have friends here but outside of the nyc skinhead crew (211, A.B.S., WCT...) the people around here in westchester are all weird, most of them will get slaped eventually by me. they all tlak about how they miss me and im fun and bullshit like that, yet for somereason they dont call me, i call them, and when i do they act like i did something wrong. there have been times when ive tried organizing shows for a friend that was coming back home thta i havent seen in a while, but when they come i get no calls. they tell me about a party that was fun after they went. thus, i have taken drastic measures and scratched off at least 20 people that claimed to be my friends. these people are mostly form new rochelle and mamaroneck. i dotn miss them and they will never hear from me as a friend again. im not asking to hang out every weekend, but friends will keep each other updated and say hi every now and then.
Ive been hearing a lot of rumors about me, they're pretty funny to me. apparently i have a kid and an std. i will still punch who ever started them, but as for now, i dont care. its stupid, its kinda funny cause how the hell wouldnt these people know anything about me if they dotn bother calling me or talkign to me, shit is funny.
Fighting..... oh the fights. there have been a lot, way to many, havent lost yet so thats good. i hate going to a bar with the crew and knowing that certain people will get fucked up at the end of the night. ive hurt people bad but i dont regret it. violence is something im attached to, and now in my life its every weekend, and i have to addmit i feel good hurting people. i just hate when we get in trouble.
i dotn knwo what else to say for now, my family was in a rush to leave so i did many chored in between and lost my train of thought so it end here.
UP!!!!so yes, i finally slept. its been about 6 months since a decent sleep. i have to say it feels veyr good to dream again with our worrying about being woken up. everything is weird, i feel rested, maby a little too rested
DOWN!!! i woke up at 5 and am bored shitless but im happy
UP!!!i went bowling with mike and andi yesterday
DOWN!!! i bowled like shit, iim so fucking mad andi had to keep a distance cause i was like a bomb
UP!!! i found more Toletum and Division 250 songs, they make the best covers ever and their songs alone stand untouchable.
DOWN!!! there is no down bitches, they believe in whats best for Spains so you get slapped if you dont like it.
UP!!! Bolivia is not splitting up and the riots have stopped, La Paz is getting food again and gas and the airports are running. We got rid of the president and hes not let back in Bolivia because he is not loved and sold our country out.
DOWN!!! the country is crippled and who knows how the new president will run it.
UP!!! Me and andi are back together after a day of being broken up.
DOWN!!! it was a terrifing day, its happenign quite often, i cant help but believe its my fault.
UP!!! CARNAGE KREW got the studio back!!!!, that menas we can play WHENEVER WE WANT, if i want to play as loud as my amp takes me at 3 in the mornign i can, if i want to have very very loud sex no one will bother me!!!! and we can pretty much do anything we want but light the place on fire.
DOWN!!! we need to get our shit together
so much going up and down got me kinda tired..... and horny
now for a peek in my head:
Latley i cant stop but think about people in my past, many i miss and want to talk to just cause they were good conversation and helped me or i helped them. Some i just wonder about, toher i just want to hug and let them knwo they changed my life. others are far gone in drugs. some have died in Guerrilla attacks in Colombia. some i cant help but wonder..... what the fuck happened. ive been seperated from loved ones and friends all my life, but the ones that hurt me the most are the ones that are no longer because we "grew up" and the ones that i had to leave. i miss so many people mostly the women, the guys can handle their own but the women i wan tto know are doing fine. i miss having that one friend of the opposite sex that i can talk to about anything. here..... i have no one, yes my girlfriend is my best friend but that leaves me no one to ask advice to.so heres a list of everyone i miss out side of the USA
El Salvador: Andrea Valenzuela
C.J. Rampone
Juan Carlos Sol
Adriana Gasteasoro
Colombia: Vytis
Manuela Carrillo
Lisa Bassil
Italia: Alenjandro "Mono" Melo (colombia)
Bolivia: Andres Justiniano "Grillo" or "Primo"
Milton Justiniano "Descansad en paz... "(R.I.P.)
i do have friends here but outside of the nyc skinhead crew (211, A.B.S., WCT...) the people around here in westchester are all weird, most of them will get slaped eventually by me. they all tlak about how they miss me and im fun and bullshit like that, yet for somereason they dont call me, i call them, and when i do they act like i did something wrong. there have been times when ive tried organizing shows for a friend that was coming back home thta i havent seen in a while, but when they come i get no calls. they tell me about a party that was fun after they went. thus, i have taken drastic measures and scratched off at least 20 people that claimed to be my friends. these people are mostly form new rochelle and mamaroneck. i dotn miss them and they will never hear from me as a friend again. im not asking to hang out every weekend, but friends will keep each other updated and say hi every now and then.
Ive been hearing a lot of rumors about me, they're pretty funny to me. apparently i have a kid and an std. i will still punch who ever started them, but as for now, i dont care. its stupid, its kinda funny cause how the hell wouldnt these people know anything about me if they dotn bother calling me or talkign to me, shit is funny.
Fighting..... oh the fights. there have been a lot, way to many, havent lost yet so thats good. i hate going to a bar with the crew and knowing that certain people will get fucked up at the end of the night. ive hurt people bad but i dont regret it. violence is something im attached to, and now in my life its every weekend, and i have to addmit i feel good hurting people. i just hate when we get in trouble.
i dotn knwo what else to say for now, my family was in a rush to leave so i did many chored in between and lost my train of thought so it end here.