Comments | ohsam: Drawing Outlines (of Us, with Chalk on the Asphalt)

vail_kagami in ohsam

Drawing Outlines (of Us, with Chalk on the Asphalt)

Nov 16, 2010 15:42

Title: Drawing Outlines (of Us, with Chalk on the Asphalt)
Author: vail_kagami
Genre: gen
Characters: Sam, Dean, Bobby
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 5218
Warnings: Some violence, OC death
Spoilers: Set between 5.16 and 5.17.
Summary: Dean's inability to trust his brother becomes life-threatening when Sam is injured fighting demons.
Note: For the h/c challenge. Prompt ( Read more... )

internal injuries, injury, hospitalization, concussion, &fic challenge, broken bones/fractures, » fic, .genre » gen

Comments 36

vonnie836 November 16 2010, 16:35:31 UTC

Great story. I loved the way you had Sam focus only on saving the woman, killing the demon and helping Dean, no matter how badly he was hurt. And Dean, he was so angry, he couldn't see the signs for what they were, but rather took them as signs of guilt, anger and later even as signs of withdrawal. The time you set it in was well chosen too, because it really let this story be completely within canon. It reflects Dean's mindset at the time, something that he was driven to by Zachariah mostly. At that time he was just as much a victim as Sam was in Season 4.

I also have to congratulate you to choosing this particular song. It fits rather well. Makes me wonder though, are you German?

Hugs, Vonnie

vail_kagami November 17 2010, 06:03:41 UTC

Thank you! Yeah, that time was pretty much the absolutle low of their relationship.

Yeah, I'm German.

lelaro November 16 2010, 16:58:44 UTC

the concept that sam would rely on dying to fix injuries gives me shivers down my spine...

you kind of mispelled ribs in the text here: Dean had been updated on his injuries. Broken rips. Punctured lung.

vail_kagami November 17 2010, 06:04:22 UTC

Woops, sorry. Fixed it, thank you!

embroiderama November 16 2010, 17:03:12 UTC

Oh, Sam. I love how Dean's anger and silence gave way to absolute panic at how badly Sam was injured.

vail_kagami November 17 2010, 06:04:55 UTC

That's Dean for you: He's got layers! :P

Thanks for the comment!

khakigrrl November 16 2010, 18:07:30 UTC

I love love love this!!! So everything I'd hoped for and more!

Poor Sammy! Poor Dean! Poor Bobby. He needed a wacking stick in Season 5 so he could reach them boys and hit 'em upside the head.

I really liked the use of their inevitable resurrections in this season being used as a device to just hurt them more. Oh, Dean! I don't see it as Sam asking Dean to kill him so much as offering to off himself so that Dean wouldn't leave without him. They so needed a break and a chance to just relax and be brothers again. I love that you're giving it to them.

Thank you again for taking the prompt! So better than I'd even hoped (and I hoped for a lot!) ;-)

vail_kagami November 17 2010, 06:06:53 UTC

I'm so glad this turned out to your satisfaction!
It was a great prompt. But at that time in their lives they are hard to write. Comfort is so hard to be found...

de_nugis November 16 2010, 18:10:04 UTC

You really capture that s5 low point, of Dean tangled up and exhausted and not able to trust and almost letting Sam go but never quite fully reaching the point, and Sam with that practical streak and the sheer commitment to keeping going. I like that it didn't really fix things, but took a tiny step and treated both characters with compassion.

vail_kagami November 17 2010, 06:08:39 UTC

Thank you! I find them hard to write at that time, and I'm glad you think it works.