Update
So the last time I posted a journal entry was pretty long ago.I had this livejournal for a little while and i'm not the kind of person who talks to other people quickly. I sort of felt like it was a waste of time, but i need to rant once and a while, about whatever, without people judging me or laughing or whatever. So right now, i'm sitting in my room messing around on my computer, i finished cleaning my living room, since I'm going to the renaissance this weekend, i had to have the house cleaned. About two weeks ago, I started getting into the Twilight Saga, and after I bought the first book, I bought the other three. I was done all of them a little over a week. I couldn't stop reading it was like addicting. Then I got into this trance once I found out that the movie was coming out. I started watching interviews and movie trailers like over and over again. I started to re-read the books again, this time I'm noting my favorite quotes and/or writing down definitions to words I don't know. I know it sounds stupid, like why waste my time, but I don't want to write in the book and I want to look in this journal later on and read the quotes, and thinking 'oh i remember that, that was so funny' or whatever. I admit I have no life. I get up, get dressed, babysit, clean a little here and there, eat, listen to music, read online, listen to music before going to bed, and have that daydream. I start college this tuesday, so that should help me keep focused. I know their are a ton of twilight fans, and I'm to lazy to go out and talk to people. I know that maybe it'd be nice to talk to some other twilighters, and just other interesting people in general. All together, I know that i need to change a certain thing in my life in order for me to be blissfully happy. But i think about depressing things, and make up excuses and push the problems deep down. Mainly it's my appearance, i've been struggling with that for years, and it's about time that I do something about it. I've never said that online before, I did in journals, but not online. If I knew people who were going through the same thing it would probably help, but I don't. I don't have any outside friends I had one, but that ended under bad terms like a year ago, and my friend that I had for years, I just sort of stopped talking to her. I'm sort of independent and I like to be left alone but you know it's nice to have some people to talk to other than your family. I need motivation. If anyone does read this, please don't be so judgmental and critical. This is me just getting some feelings out that have been inside me for a while.