ONTD Original - Scandals in the Evangelical Church

[ladyjj]

The anniversary of this shitshow is upcoming, so that's why it's being featured in this edition of ONTD Divinity School. Get your calculators out, jackals. Numbers abound!

Welcome to the

Comments

[ladychips]

i used to work at an evangelical church, the behind the scenes stuff was pretty toxic. not really super moreso than other offices ive worked at, but they were pretending like everything was sunshine and roses which was bs. veeeeery judgemental was the main thing, which was inappropriate at a jesus institution, i thought. i had to sign a morality contract too lol. the verbiage was super vague about what not to do so i asked for a list of things i shouldnt be doing out in the world and they looked at me like i was crazy. i was like i dont want to be fired so can you please be more specific, and they just said something along the lines of if you know you know. imo it was so they could terminate anyone at any point, so that was always hanging over your head too

[espressotorte]

Not surprised that they're pro right to work lol

[ladyjj]

imo it was so they could terminate anyone at any point,

That's EXACTLY what it was. The only remotely religious organization I worked for was Catholic Charities of Rockville Centre and that was shitshow on so many levels. Super judgy-judgy.

[varioussaints]

Obviously feel no pressure to actually share anything but I would be very interested in any stories you might have from that job! I am not at all surprised that their morality contract basically boiled down to, IYKYK.

[ladychips]

im trying to think of good ones! we were paid dirt, obviously. one associate pastor left his paycheck out on accident once and i peeped and saw he was only paid 30k a year. he was one of the department leaders, too. the women in my area got gathered once so that we could be lectured about how "some of us" had been slipping and should NOT be doing things like getting into cars alone with men (not in safety way, in a This Looks Bad way - basically my friend and the only other person until 40 there had gotten a ride home from a guy who also worked there and the women were appalled). i brought up that the bible specifically says we shouldnt be gossiping, and they were like this doesnt count as gossip! lol. vbs one year had a dino-theme and there was a panic and we had to all say that we wouldn't contradict the church's teachings that the earth was only a couple of thousand years old. i just made sure i wasnt around anyone going while that was happening, cause i wasnt about to push that lie but also i didnt want to be fired. no drinking/

[aciren95]

Being fired because there was wine BEHIND her in a picture is crazy - the rest of it is still crazy but more like “yeah I could see that” kind of crazy. Geez….

[ladychips]

oh one that really made my blood boil was at a harvest festival thing (instead of halloween, of course) a lesbian couple brought their kids and were talking to one of the employees and they said something about how they had been worried that we wouldnt be accepting of them. and the employee was like of course we are, we love all of gods children! and then found out later that they were a couple and got a lecture about how we are accepting but we also have to follow the bible and they were living in sin. AWFUL. i was like i ugh i sincerely hope that nice couple does NOT come back because they shouldnt be subjected to these people.

[varioussaints]

Thank you so much for the stories! This is all so foreign to me, so I truly appreciate you sharing. You not being allowed to help others at your workplace really sticks out to me. Your workplace was literally a church, whose mission would presumably have included (among other things) a call for the faithful to help others??? I am trying to think of how to say this, so please forgive the inelegance of my comment, but honestly, if an associate pastor and department leader is only being paid 30k$/year they're either severely underpaying him and/or have seriously over-hired for the size of church. The prominent fat cat pastors making huge salaries for next to no work are destructive and a problem in their own right but compared to the total numbers of pastors in America (and the world) they are few and far between. In most churches (including, I suspect, your former employer), the actual hard work of meeting the community's needs tends to fall not on the highly paid pastors (if even they have one) but instead on poorly paid and overworked

[ladychips]

sometimes it is definitely best to NOT see the sausage being made. i stopped attending the church because i had to go to the adult singles area to use this special printer they had, and i was waiting on it so i was chilling in a cubicle on my phone, and the small group leaders (all men, ofc) were laughing while one of them was on the phone, because he was trying to counsel a woman having a breakdown because she thought committing the unforgiveable sin before she became christian meant that she was still going to go to hell. and these guys were laughing at her! LAUGHING. AT. HER. omg i have no words for how disgusted i was. i told my higher up and im not sure what happened from there, i shouldve followed up :/. absolutely disgusting.

[varioussaints]

Oh my God?! That's heartbreaking and infuriating all in one go. Please tell me the man on the phone with her wasn't laughing at her, at least. I am simultaneously 0% surprised and also a bit shocked. They were in an open area anyone could have walked into. I don't want to imagine how they behaved behind closed doors. I hope that the woman was able to work through it and that the man on the phone was supportive and kind to her. This is making me think about how weird the idea of small groups are in general? I would vastly prefer (in concept/an idealized form) the idea of going to confessional over participating in something like a small group and seeking guidance there. Obviously Catholic priests are far from perfect and the reporting mechanisms that are in place to report inappropriate counsel, behaviour, etc. are absolute garbage, but as for the concept/the ideal implementation of confession, I would much prefer going to someone who actually had to study and actually learn their religion (and whose conduct would be, in the ideal

[ladychips]

the guy on the phone was not laughing! he seemed to be genuinely trying to counsel her while the assholes near him were finding religious trauma a great joke. at least she couldnt hear them - im pretty sure, at least, or i feel like the conversation wouldve changed. and you know if they knew i was there theyd be on their best behavior. but once they think its a closed door situation the true colors come out! i just could not trust anyone on their leadership level if it was this rampant.