Selena Gomez Opens Up About Being Unable to Carry Her Own Children

[hewontgo]

Selena Gomez Opens Up About Being Unable to Carry Her Own Children: 'That Was Something I Had to Grieve' https://t.co/8y5mkuVmOr
- People (@people) September 9, 2024

Selena Gomez, 32, is opening up about her future motherhood plans.

“I haven’t ever said this...but I unfortunately can’t carry my own children,” Gomez said. “I have a lot of medical

Comments

[drownsodapop]

I have a question for straight/cis women that have the possibility to have children because lol I never will so try not to think about it!
But - is it worse to not be able to carry a child, or worse to not able to conceive? Because I feel like inability to carry is not a big deal if you're rich right? But don't want to speak out of turn

But also, fuck I have a cis married friend who so badly wants to have a kid, can physically do it, but financially can't bear it. It's hard these days

[kris_terror]

I imagine they're different kinds of pain, not necessarily one being worse.

[ty]

I think both probably hurt just as much

[bdl]

it took me a year to get pregnant when i was ttc and it was very painful in that time when we kept getting negative pregnancy tests or my period would come. the disappointment was heart wrenching. at the time i believed that the grief i was feeling was likely nothing compared to people who would be able to get and stay pregnant for some time and then eventually miscarry. you begin to get attached very quickly and it all feels so fragile the first few months so to have it ripped away from you seems so incredibly painful.

but then again there are people out there who try for years and years to get pregnant and never manage for whatever the reason. some people may even have the resources to put tens of thousands of dollars into it and still not get pregnant and i imagine that is also very difficult.

so yeah i couldn’t say one is harder than the other.

[bellwetherr]

it's all different kinds of pain i think!

[teaaet]

But - is it worse to not be able to carry a child, or worse to not able to conceive? Because I feel like inability to carry is not a big deal if you're rich right? But don't want to speak out of turn

I think it depends a lot on whether you want a biological child. I know people who've done both... one used a surrogate because she couldn't carry, and the other used a donor egg and carried. It was really difficult for both of them, and so expensive. They were both so happy in the end getting their babies.

Personally, my first concern is for the woman enabling this process for someone else, either through egg donation or surrogacy. I think in her case, egg donation is much less invasive and challenging than going through a pregnancy! But it still involves paying women for their body parts/labor and that's not great.

[jeeshee]

In my country, egg donors are only paid expenses or they are given reduced price for their own ivf as the egg retrieval happens at the same time. A lot of women do it philanthropically because they have struggled with conception themselves or come from communities (lgbt or smbc) where they understand the need for donors.

[teaaet]

that sounds better than the system we have in the US, where colleges are plastered with ads recruiting women to sell their eggs

[noodlecookie]

It depends on the woman tbh, I got very sick years ago and was told I'm never going to be able to conceive but I was more relieved that the pain stopped that I didn't care about losing that. Some of my family members on the other hand were very upset when I told them, and every now and then they keep reminding me that IVF/adoption/surrogacy are still options. I've never once expressed a desire to have kids, I have anxiety taking care of plants never mind humans lmao.

[sastra_fuss]

That feels like a "should I cut my right leg off or my left leg off" question.

[aliceofclubs]

tell the friend to (seriously) consider moving out of the U.S. not being snobby or condescending (I really don't mean it that way) but it still blows my mind that SO MANY people refrain from having kids in the u.s. just bc of hospital/medical bills.