ONTD ORIGINAL: The First and Last Movies of An Actor in the 2010s Part 2
I actually had fun with that last post, so here we go again.
Here's Noted Anti-Blacktress Gina Rodriguez, ( Whose father is dark skinned).
FIRST MOVIE OF THE DECADE: Go For It! (2011)
Plot: Is she student or is she dancer?
LAST MOVIE OF THE DECADE: Someone Great (2019)
Ironic.
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
Racism makes this a No-Up.
I have often said that Octavia Spencer's films involve her fighting children. Turns out that's only a very recent development.
FIRST: Small Town Saturday Night (2010)
[The only picture of her on the IMDB page doesn't even have her in focus or facing the screen. Everything in this movie looks like it was shot on a potato. I'm not going to do her like that.]
LAST: Ma (2019)
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
From the back of her head in a movie to starring in it and tormenting the youth. I say yes.
His next role will have Robert Pattinson going a little batshit - And then he's gonna be Batman! - but for now...
FIRST: Remember Me (2010)
Plot: Romance and death.
LAST: The Lighthouse (2019) & The King (2019)
[They came out on the same day apparently, so I'm picking one image...
The King (2019)
also in something called Waiting For The Barbarians with Johnny Looks Like Death]
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
Depends on which movie you're talking about. Yes if Lighthouse, no if King.
As Lupita Nyong'o's presence in TROS was even more negligible than Kelly Marie Tran's, we're going to alter the deal. Pray I do not need to alter it further.
FIRST: 12 Years A Slave (2013)
LAST: Little Monsters (2019)
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
Yes. From portraying slavery to killing Australian Zombies is amazing and we shold all applaud. Little Monsters is also pretty funny, she is clearly the best part.
Hopefully, she is coming for her next Oscar for Us.
Remember when we all hoped Nathan Stewart-Jarrett would be Newt Scamander in WB's Ill-fated Fantastic Beasts movies? Good times.
FIRST: The Comedian (2012)
Plot: Life sucks.
LAST: Mope (2019)
Plot: Life sucks but now we're porn actors.
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
I have no idea-up. Mope is apparently pretty good, and came out this year as stated, so maybe we can find it somewhere.
So Hayden Christensen is apparently in Rise of Skywalker but IDR him. Then again, I was near bored to tears.
FIRST: Takers (2010)
You ever wonder how billing happens in movies? Is it retroactive in how famous people get? Because he's listed second after Chr*s Br*wn.
Or am I thinking too much about TAKERS (2010).
LAST: The Last Man (2019)
"I hate sand!"
Plot: A war, a man, a bomb shelter, some crazy shit?
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
Glow Up, as he's no longer in a movie with an abuser*
*that we know of.
Who saw this first movie of Michael B Jordan's for this decade? I vaguely remember it. Don't think I saw it. Know ya'll didn't.
FIRST: Red Tails (2012) [beats Chronicle by about 2 weeks]
This also stars N*te P*rker, who has no value as a filmmaker.
LAST: Just Mercy (2019)
There are also plenty of his films in the pipeline that are either based upon real stories or are produced and directed by Ryan Cooper.
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
Well the Glow Up came with Killmonger in Black Panther (2018), but this is fine. Fight legal system crime, son!
Did ya'll know Charlize Theron is almost 6 ft. Tall??? I did not. Damn.
FIRST: Young Adult (2011)
Plot: A Hallmark movie but rated R.
Also stars Patrick "The Ghost Man" Wilson.
LAST: Bombshell (2019)
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
None of these hold a candle to Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) or Atomic Blonde (2017) but alas.
I was wholly prepared to put in The Sorcerer's Apprentice as Toby "The OPs favorite white British Man" Kebbell, but, uh, gotta put this one instead. Are you ready for more whitewashing?
FIRST: Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (2010)
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
LAST: This is my post and I'm cheating, because his hair in Destroyer (2018) is an affront to my eyes and I rebuke it in the name of the Lord.
It's terrible.
Snakes, house, manifest, all that.
So look, here's Servant and it's on AppleTV+.
Hearts started manifesting in my eyes physically.
GLOW UP OR NO UP?
Well, there's no whitewashing. I consider it a win.
Emily Blunt has gone from some real crazy shit to some real bland stuff, like...
FIRST: The Wolfman (2010), the first failed attempt in Universal's Dark Universe. Second was I, Frankenstein (2014). Third was, well, you know.
Another Universal fun fact - They own a lot of properties that are based off of the Universal Monsters that they didn't create (bc public domain).
They own the film rights to Monster High! Just do that!
LAST: Mary Poppins Returns (2018)
Great voice, beautiful voice. "The Place Where Lost Things Go" and "The Royal Doulton Music Hall" are actually quite good.GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
Start with terribleness, end with mediocrity. It's a glow up, but a slim one.
Because I love making these as random as possible, let's end it with someone we all know, Keean Johnson, even indirectly.
FIRST: Heritage Falls (2016)
Plot: Man (not pictured) takes his son and nephew (pictured) into the woods without delay.
He's actually supposed to be a college student here.
LAST: Midway (2019)
TFW your Oscar bait made 0 impact on anyone.
He's only been in about 4 movies, including the highly underrated and great Alita: Battle Angel.
You know the drill - Post your own! Happy new year!
source:
IMDB + me watching AppleTV+
Here's Noted Anti-Blacktress Gina Rodriguez, ( Whose father is dark skinned).
FIRST MOVIE OF THE DECADE: Go For It! (2011)
Plot: Is she student or is she dancer?
LAST MOVIE OF THE DECADE: Someone Great (2019)
Ironic.
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
Racism makes this a No-Up.
I have often said that Octavia Spencer's films involve her fighting children. Turns out that's only a very recent development.
FIRST: Small Town Saturday Night (2010)
[The only picture of her on the IMDB page doesn't even have her in focus or facing the screen. Everything in this movie looks like it was shot on a potato. I'm not going to do her like that.]
LAST: Ma (2019)
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
From the back of her head in a movie to starring in it and tormenting the youth. I say yes.
His next role will have Robert Pattinson going a little batshit - And then he's gonna be Batman! - but for now...
FIRST: Remember Me (2010)
Plot: Romance and death.
LAST: The Lighthouse (2019) & The King (2019)
[They came out on the same day apparently, so I'm picking one image...
The King (2019)
also in something called Waiting For The Barbarians with Johnny Looks Like Death]
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
Depends on which movie you're talking about. Yes if Lighthouse, no if King.
As Lupita Nyong'o's presence in TROS was even more negligible than Kelly Marie Tran's, we're going to alter the deal. Pray I do not need to alter it further.
FIRST: 12 Years A Slave (2013)
LAST: Little Monsters (2019)
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?:
Yes. From portraying slavery to killing Australian Zombies is amazing and we shold all applaud. Little Monsters is also pretty funny, she is clearly the best part.
Hopefully, she is coming for her next Oscar for Us.
Remember when we all hoped Nathan Stewart-Jarrett would be Newt Scamander in WB's Ill-fated Fantastic Beasts movies? Good times.
FIRST: The Comedian (2012)
Plot: Life sucks.
LAST: Mope (2019)
Plot: Life sucks but now we're porn actors.
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
I have no idea-up. Mope is apparently pretty good, and came out this year as stated, so maybe we can find it somewhere.
So Hayden Christensen is apparently in Rise of Skywalker but IDR him. Then again, I was near bored to tears.
FIRST: Takers (2010)
You ever wonder how billing happens in movies? Is it retroactive in how famous people get? Because he's listed second after Chr*s Br*wn.
Or am I thinking too much about TAKERS (2010).
LAST: The Last Man (2019)
"I hate sand!"
Plot: A war, a man, a bomb shelter, some crazy shit?
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
Glow Up, as he's no longer in a movie with an abuser*
*that we know of.
Who saw this first movie of Michael B Jordan's for this decade? I vaguely remember it. Don't think I saw it. Know ya'll didn't.
FIRST: Red Tails (2012) [beats Chronicle by about 2 weeks]
This also stars N*te P*rker, who has no value as a filmmaker.
LAST: Just Mercy (2019)
There are also plenty of his films in the pipeline that are either based upon real stories or are produced and directed by Ryan Cooper.
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
Well the Glow Up came with Killmonger in Black Panther (2018), but this is fine. Fight legal system crime, son!
Did ya'll know Charlize Theron is almost 6 ft. Tall??? I did not. Damn.
FIRST: Young Adult (2011)
Plot: A Hallmark movie but rated R.
Also stars Patrick "The Ghost Man" Wilson.
LAST: Bombshell (2019)
GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
None of these hold a candle to Mad Max: Fury Road (2015) or Atomic Blonde (2017) but alas.
I was wholly prepared to put in The Sorcerer's Apprentice as Toby "The OPs favorite white British Man" Kebbell, but, uh, gotta put this one instead. Are you ready for more whitewashing?
FIRST: Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (2010)
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
LAST: This is my post and I'm cheating, because his hair in Destroyer (2018) is an affront to my eyes and I rebuke it in the name of the Lord.
It's terrible.
Snakes, house, manifest, all that.
So look, here's Servant and it's on AppleTV+.
Hearts started manifesting in my eyes physically.
GLOW UP OR NO UP?
Well, there's no whitewashing. I consider it a win.
Emily Blunt has gone from some real crazy shit to some real bland stuff, like...
FIRST: The Wolfman (2010), the first failed attempt in Universal's Dark Universe. Second was I, Frankenstein (2014). Third was, well, you know.
Another Universal fun fact - They own a lot of properties that are based off of the Universal Monsters that they didn't create (bc public domain).
They own the film rights to Monster High! Just do that!
LAST: Mary Poppins Returns (2018)
Great voice, beautiful voice. "The Place Where Lost Things Go" and "The Royal Doulton Music Hall" are actually quite good.GLOW UP OR NO-UP?
Start with terribleness, end with mediocrity. It's a glow up, but a slim one.
Because I love making these as random as possible, let's end it with someone we all know, Keean Johnson, even indirectly.
FIRST: Heritage Falls (2016)
Plot: Man (not pictured) takes his son and nephew (pictured) into the woods without delay.
He's actually supposed to be a college student here.
LAST: Midway (2019)
TFW your Oscar bait made 0 impact on anyone.
He's only been in about 4 movies, including the highly underrated and great Alita: Battle Angel.
You know the drill - Post your own! Happy new year!
source:
IMDB + me watching AppleTV+