My weekend has been cool. On Friday night I stayed in and did a load of artist studies in my book, my project is coming along nicely. I'm looking at stencil art and stuff tis pretty cool :D
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hmm he came round today and i said my friends dont think i shud hang out with him and he was all like aww mima uve made all ur friends hate me when i havent even done anything wrong.
WHAT?! my reaction exactly
then he was like ive never had any intention to hurt you on purpose because i clearly dont dislike you etc
and then he was like yeh well i dont give a fuck if yr friends dont like me and he said that he thought u were giving him evil looks and that when i told you you were like err no i didnt and he goes yeh well fuck lucy coz she was
yeah you can imagine how that went down.
but the thing is, err i dunno. we fought and i couldnt fight back because i knew id cry and we outside doing some painting so i ran behind this wall to calm myself down.
i just cant hate him because everything about what we were like together is true, none of it is nasty and i cant hate him just coz he didnt think we were right together, u know hes entitled to it. he doesnt have to be with me. i said how him telling me i was beautiful and stuff doesnt help me and he said that he knows i feel crap most of the time about myself and if that makes me feel special he'll continue telling me - how can i condemn him for that?
he was on about how when he comes to my house he feels weird coz it seems so easy to just be able to slip into just hugging and that if were sat their in my room talking doing nothing else he thinks we can just talk like that on the phone, and that he thinks when we hang out we should get up to stuff and do stuff. it all makes sense, i think that would help me if when i hung out with him we did stuff like painting like we did today - coz when hes there at my house ALL i wanna do is hold him like i used to. see, i cant hate him he knows whats right he honestly does. im not just sticking up for him i just err i dunno. he knows hanging out with me hurts me. so hes jst gonna call me for a while. we both agreed on having some space.
dont hate him for me please. give him a chance. he is nice hes just messed up himself i cant blame him for that. hes on about counsellors and shit, i just need to support him instead of breaking down all the time. im gonnna moooooooooooove on with my life :D and help him out with his. im gonna have some fun hehe and do more painting and that. yeah! yeah! haha love you xxx
mima we never said we hated him so i don't know what he was on bout we ment it wuld be best not seeing him because it hurts you to much in the long runn so hes a willy hehe but a noice one.
and i know u want to support him but to be honest your upset yourself and breaking down is probably what id do to be honest wanting to be there is alot easier than doing it when it comes to it you know what i mean. i think he need to help himself with this you just got to be the good friend and not just take his problems for him you know
god i must sounds like im being a total bitch i dont mean it like that i just dont want to see you all hurt you dont deserve it love you muchly love bash xxxxxxxxxxxxx
WHAT?! my reaction exactly
then he was like ive never had any intention to hurt you on purpose because i clearly dont dislike you etc
and then he was like yeh well i dont give a fuck if yr friends dont like me and he said that he thought u were giving him evil looks and that when i told you you were like err no i didnt and he goes yeh well fuck lucy coz she was
yeah you can imagine how that went down.
but the thing is, err i dunno. we fought and i couldnt fight back because i knew id cry and we outside doing some painting so i ran behind this wall to calm myself down.
i just cant hate him because everything about what we were like together is true, none of it is nasty and i cant hate him just coz he didnt think we were right together, u know hes entitled to it. he doesnt have to be with me. i said how him telling me i was beautiful and stuff doesnt help me and he said that he knows i feel crap most of the time about myself and if that makes me feel special he'll continue telling me - how can i condemn him for that?
he was on about how when he comes to my house he feels weird coz it seems so easy to just be able to slip into just hugging and that if were sat their in my room talking doing nothing else he thinks we can just talk like that on the phone, and that he thinks when we hang out we should get up to stuff and do stuff. it all makes sense, i think that would help me if when i hung out with him we did stuff like painting like we did today - coz when hes there at my house ALL i wanna do is hold him like i used to. see, i cant hate him he knows whats right he honestly does. im not just sticking up for him i just err i dunno. he knows hanging out with me hurts me. so hes jst gonna call me for a while. we both agreed on having some space.
dont hate him for me please. give him a chance. he is nice hes just messed up himself i cant blame him for that. hes on about counsellors and shit, i just need to support him instead of breaking down all the time. im gonnna moooooooooooove on with my life :D and help him out with his. im gonna have some fun hehe and do more painting and that. yeah! yeah! haha love you xxx
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and i know u want to support him but to be honest your upset yourself and breaking down is probably what id do to be honest wanting to be there is alot easier than doing it when it comes to it you know what i mean. i think he need to help himself with this you just got to be the good friend and not just take his problems for him you know
god i must sounds like im being a total bitch i dont mean it like that i just dont want to see you all hurt you dont deserve it love you muchly love bash xxxxxxxxxxxxx
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