Punky black and heaps of Baubles strike a high note...
“They Can break me. Make me if they want they can chase me... Love me .. hate me.. I don’t care anymore.” - L. Lohan
Maya Angelou once wrote a narrative that started with “I looked up the road I was going and back the way I came from since I wasn’t satisfied I decided to step off and cut myself a new path.”
This is what I have decided to do... cut a new path, Start over.. and become better. I have been thinking about life and I have made some decisions (something everyone tells me I never do) So many things make me who I am. Although this is random heres the basics-
I like people that speak their mind. I hate rude people. I am drawn to people who know who they are and what they want because I am trying to figure that out about myself. I am 18 and trying to figure out what I want in life and who I am. I am in search of God and I have been for a while I don’t think that I have found him yet but I do think that I am a lot closer then was thanks to so many people I have met in my life. I was saving myself for marriage but that didn’t work out so well... But I am still a firm believer that sleeping around is disgusting. I have very few regrets but I wish that I had none. Sometimes I try to hard.... But that’s because up until 5 minutes ago all I ever wanted to do was to be perfect. But I am not. Nobody is. I’m just me. I have faced a lot of shitty stuff in my life but I have made the recent decision of not letting that bring me down. I get emo sometimes but thanks to my friends that usually goes away after a while. I got a lesson in what true friends are.. thanks to certain people. And I remind myself everyday that the only person I can trust is myself and the only people who are my friends are the ones that love me for me no matter what I do. A lot of people think that I make things complicated but I am working on fixing that. I am not trying to be anyone that I am not anymore. I singly loudly and most of the time off key but I love music more then anything in the world. My natural hair color is brown but its been dyed over and over again. I hate shopping but I like new things. I hate studying but I want to be smart. I tug on my ear when I am stressed and nervous. And I bite my lip and look down when I’m scared. I play with my hair when I am bored. I talk without thinking and I apologize to much for things that aren’t my fault. Although I tell people how I feel (usually to often) I also keep a lot of stuff to myself. I hate sleeping alone. My biggest fear is death and the worst feeling in the world is unrequited love. I don’t get sick very often but when I do I am miserable. I hate being on top when it comes to making out. I learned that drinking isn’t all its cracked up to be and Im a lot more reserved when I do it now thanks to a lot of mistakes I made before I knew that. I like holding hands and I like hugs. I walk really slow and everyone is always telling me to hurry up. I love my mom and my older sister. I have only been in love once in my entire life and I am still feeling the effects of it. I want to be a kindergarten teacher cause I love kids. My favorite subject is English. And I have been failing math since numbers were invented. I like watching the history and the SCI FI channels. I have a niece and a nephew that I love very much. My best friends are my sister, “My Jessica”, Tarezy, Mackenize, and Aaron. I cant live without spending time with Evan. I bat my eyelashes when Im confused. I love meeting new people and trying new things. One of my favorite movies is grease and I love the soundtrack. I cant hear “Over and Over again” without laughing. I live in the middle of no where. My favorite songs of all time are “The Piano Man” - Billy Joel, “Another day in paradise” - Phil Collins and “I’m just a girl” - No Doubt. My favorite food is onion rings with honey mustard. (but I love ALEXS’S Banana splits) My favorite colors are pink and black. I hate sneezing. I sleep with a pink pig named IOWA every night. And thanks to a long talk with someone I now know all of these things make me who I am....
“were they wasted words and did they mean a thing?.... I want hold on but it hurts so bad.. and I cant keep something that I never had.”
I think that I have been holding on to something to tight. I have been trying to MAKE it work ... if its meant to be it will happen without me trying so hard... it took me a while but I finally understand that. I recently broke up with a real nice boyfriend because I thought I knew what I wanted but I realized that I deserve so much better then that... I wish you could see that.
“it seems like I woke up beneath a different sky and Im drunk off what Im seeing through these open eyes.”
The people that make me feel like shit, the people who don’t say what they mean, the people who talk behind my back, the people who create “plastic sabotage”, the people who don’t influence me positively, the people who lead me on, and the people who don’t care are being what I like to call “eliminated”
“God Hath not promise sun without Rain, joy without pain, and sorrow without peace.”
Well I have had plenty of rain, pain, and sorrow and its time for the good stuff and Im gonna have the people I love around me to see it. The next two days will be completely honest ones. If you want to know my opinion of you or you have something you always wanted to ask or something you think I lied about feel free to ask because Im not holding anything back. Leave a comment. TXT or call me and I’ll tell you how it is.
“Its my life no stress.... no fights... Im leaving it all behind... no tears no time to cry just making the most of life.”
Maya Angelou once wrote a narrative that started with “I looked up the road I was going and back the way I came from since I wasn’t satisfied I decided to step off and cut myself a new path.”
This is what I have decided to do... cut a new path, Start over.. and become better. I have been thinking about life and I have made some decisions (something everyone tells me I never do) So many things make me who I am. Although this is random heres the basics-
I like people that speak their mind. I hate rude people. I am drawn to people who know who they are and what they want because I am trying to figure that out about myself. I am 18 and trying to figure out what I want in life and who I am. I am in search of God and I have been for a while I don’t think that I have found him yet but I do think that I am a lot closer then was thanks to so many people I have met in my life. I was saving myself for marriage but that didn’t work out so well... But I am still a firm believer that sleeping around is disgusting. I have very few regrets but I wish that I had none. Sometimes I try to hard.... But that’s because up until 5 minutes ago all I ever wanted to do was to be perfect. But I am not. Nobody is. I’m just me. I have faced a lot of shitty stuff in my life but I have made the recent decision of not letting that bring me down. I get emo sometimes but thanks to my friends that usually goes away after a while. I got a lesson in what true friends are.. thanks to certain people. And I remind myself everyday that the only person I can trust is myself and the only people who are my friends are the ones that love me for me no matter what I do. A lot of people think that I make things complicated but I am working on fixing that. I am not trying to be anyone that I am not anymore. I singly loudly and most of the time off key but I love music more then anything in the world. My natural hair color is brown but its been dyed over and over again. I hate shopping but I like new things. I hate studying but I want to be smart. I tug on my ear when I am stressed and nervous. And I bite my lip and look down when I’m scared. I play with my hair when I am bored. I talk without thinking and I apologize to much for things that aren’t my fault. Although I tell people how I feel (usually to often) I also keep a lot of stuff to myself. I hate sleeping alone. My biggest fear is death and the worst feeling in the world is unrequited love. I don’t get sick very often but when I do I am miserable. I hate being on top when it comes to making out. I learned that drinking isn’t all its cracked up to be and Im a lot more reserved when I do it now thanks to a lot of mistakes I made before I knew that. I like holding hands and I like hugs. I walk really slow and everyone is always telling me to hurry up. I love my mom and my older sister. I have only been in love once in my entire life and I am still feeling the effects of it. I want to be a kindergarten teacher cause I love kids. My favorite subject is English. And I have been failing math since numbers were invented. I like watching the history and the SCI FI channels. I have a niece and a nephew that I love very much. My best friends are my sister, “My Jessica”, Tarezy, Mackenize, and Aaron. I cant live without spending time with Evan. I bat my eyelashes when Im confused. I love meeting new people and trying new things. One of my favorite movies is grease and I love the soundtrack. I cant hear “Over and Over again” without laughing. I live in the middle of no where. My favorite songs of all time are “The Piano Man” - Billy Joel, “Another day in paradise” - Phil Collins and “I’m just a girl” - No Doubt. My favorite food is onion rings with honey mustard. (but I love ALEXS’S Banana splits) My favorite colors are pink and black. I hate sneezing. I sleep with a pink pig named IOWA every night. And thanks to a long talk with someone I now know all of these things make me who I am....
“were they wasted words and did they mean a thing?.... I want hold on but it hurts so bad.. and I cant keep something that I never had.”
I think that I have been holding on to something to tight. I have been trying to MAKE it work ... if its meant to be it will happen without me trying so hard... it took me a while but I finally understand that. I recently broke up with a real nice boyfriend because I thought I knew what I wanted but I realized that I deserve so much better then that... I wish you could see that.
“it seems like I woke up beneath a different sky and Im drunk off what Im seeing through these open eyes.”
The people that make me feel like shit, the people who don’t say what they mean, the people who talk behind my back, the people who create “plastic sabotage”, the people who don’t influence me positively, the people who lead me on, and the people who don’t care are being what I like to call “eliminated”
“God Hath not promise sun without Rain, joy without pain, and sorrow without peace.”
Well I have had plenty of rain, pain, and sorrow and its time for the good stuff and Im gonna have the people I love around me to see it. The next two days will be completely honest ones. If you want to know my opinion of you or you have something you always wanted to ask or something you think I lied about feel free to ask because Im not holding anything back. Leave a comment. TXT or call me and I’ll tell you how it is.
“Its my life no stress.... no fights... Im leaving it all behind... no tears no time to cry just making the most of life.”