how could i have ever been so blind?
"...you don't know how lucky you are to be with someone like Kile and to be in this serious of a relationship this young...so just hold on to everything you have while you have it (which will hopefully be forever) but instead of looking to what might or could happen think about how lucky both of you are to have each other..."
i'm just retarted. i have everything in the world i could ever need to make me smile. the thing is, i'm selfish, and i don't know what i want in life and i envy everone who does get everything they want when they want it, they have a talent,they have a life, they know what they want when they grow up. But i've been so focused on what other people have that I didn't realize what i have and I'm completely oblivious to everything. I have Mariah, who has been there for me for the past 3 and a half years, we've watched over each other and taken care of each other and have helped each other grow to be the people we are now. And if that isn't a best friend then I don't know what is. And Jen, I can't thank God enough for putting Jen in my life. I wouldn't be alive today if it were'nt for her. She is so awesome. We have cried, laughed, been goofballs and nerds. She has taught me so much this past year and I'm so lucky to have her as my best friend and my other half. Riah and Jen are amazing people and to think that I had nothing was absolutely stupid of me. And with Kile, I'm a baby. I know that I may have shut out parts of my life at times and ignored the rest of the world just to be with him, and that was wrong. Because now, here I am, where he doesn't have as much time, and I'm left with hardly any life of my own, I sit in my house all day every day, and that was stupid. I enjoyed every bit of my summer but now that Kile has a job and is starting school, and I'm left unhappy because part of my life is missing. If you're one of the friends I may have shut out or pushed away or ignored over the summer at times, please forgive me. I was selfish, I was rude, and I can't tell you guys how sorry I am. Mariah this has a lot to do with you. I know now that I should have listened to you. Kile is the best thing that has ever happend to me and I really believe that we are meant to be. But that doesn't involve making him the only thing in life that matters to me and shutting out everything else that used to be important to me. I love all of my friends with all my heart.. I love Kile, with all my heart. So this is to tell everyone that I've learned a very hard lesson...and I'm sorry.
bye
i'm just retarted. i have everything in the world i could ever need to make me smile. the thing is, i'm selfish, and i don't know what i want in life and i envy everone who does get everything they want when they want it, they have a talent,they have a life, they know what they want when they grow up. But i've been so focused on what other people have that I didn't realize what i have and I'm completely oblivious to everything. I have Mariah, who has been there for me for the past 3 and a half years, we've watched over each other and taken care of each other and have helped each other grow to be the people we are now. And if that isn't a best friend then I don't know what is. And Jen, I can't thank God enough for putting Jen in my life. I wouldn't be alive today if it were'nt for her. She is so awesome. We have cried, laughed, been goofballs and nerds. She has taught me so much this past year and I'm so lucky to have her as my best friend and my other half. Riah and Jen are amazing people and to think that I had nothing was absolutely stupid of me. And with Kile, I'm a baby. I know that I may have shut out parts of my life at times and ignored the rest of the world just to be with him, and that was wrong. Because now, here I am, where he doesn't have as much time, and I'm left with hardly any life of my own, I sit in my house all day every day, and that was stupid. I enjoyed every bit of my summer but now that Kile has a job and is starting school, and I'm left unhappy because part of my life is missing. If you're one of the friends I may have shut out or pushed away or ignored over the summer at times, please forgive me. I was selfish, I was rude, and I can't tell you guys how sorry I am. Mariah this has a lot to do with you. I know now that I should have listened to you. Kile is the best thing that has ever happend to me and I really believe that we are meant to be. But that doesn't involve making him the only thing in life that matters to me and shutting out everything else that used to be important to me. I love all of my friends with all my heart.. I love Kile, with all my heart. So this is to tell everyone that I've learned a very hard lesson...and I'm sorry.
bye