I suck at life...
This is PATHETIC! How freaking long am I going to miss him? why the hell can't I date like a normal girl? seriously, me and ryan broke up HOW long ago?
I just don't know anymore. I don't get attached to guys. Im very much a compulsive flirt, which tends to make guys think I'm interested in them, but I'm just very friendly. Not that I mean to lead people on, but I guess I kind of have, and I'm sorry about that. I really do hate that I'm like this. It jsut sucks, ya know? I know that me and ryan don't have a chance. I know he's probably happy now and better off without me. He probably doesn't even think about me anymore. But it's gotten really bad on my end. I heard a mewithoutYou song the other day and I almost freaking started crying in the middle of my debate class. Tonight, someone was just talking about someone named ryan, and the guy sitting next to me smelled like him and crap just kept reminding me of him. I hate that I miss him. I know that I can date and stuff, but I jsut don't think the right guy has come along yet. I know that sounds mean and awful considering some of the guys thatI know like me. Theyre awesome guys. Theyre going to make some girls incredably happy someday, but I just know I wouldn't be happy with them... if that makes sense. I hope it does.
I don't know, Maybe something amazing will happen and Ill meet some great guy who'll make me forget about all my stupid nighttime ramblings about ryan. Maybe some stroke of fate will make things amazing again. oh well I'll be fine. I'll probably be better tomorrow after I get some sleep or something.
I just don't know anymore. I don't get attached to guys. Im very much a compulsive flirt, which tends to make guys think I'm interested in them, but I'm just very friendly. Not that I mean to lead people on, but I guess I kind of have, and I'm sorry about that. I really do hate that I'm like this. It jsut sucks, ya know? I know that me and ryan don't have a chance. I know he's probably happy now and better off without me. He probably doesn't even think about me anymore. But it's gotten really bad on my end. I heard a mewithoutYou song the other day and I almost freaking started crying in the middle of my debate class. Tonight, someone was just talking about someone named ryan, and the guy sitting next to me smelled like him and crap just kept reminding me of him. I hate that I miss him. I know that I can date and stuff, but I jsut don't think the right guy has come along yet. I know that sounds mean and awful considering some of the guys thatI know like me. Theyre awesome guys. Theyre going to make some girls incredably happy someday, but I just know I wouldn't be happy with them... if that makes sense. I hope it does.
I don't know, Maybe something amazing will happen and Ill meet some great guy who'll make me forget about all my stupid nighttime ramblings about ryan. Maybe some stroke of fate will make things amazing again. oh well I'll be fine. I'll probably be better tomorrow after I get some sleep or something.