she can bite her bottom lip all she wants
today i sat on the trampoline in the waning light, wondering out loud. husayn and i brought out a mass of blankets and we sat there, each with a couple, just talking. talking about life, talking about past, present, future. talking about dreams, from new ones, to ones that have been discarded many years ago. it's funny like that. no one's really real until you sit down, and listen to what they have to say.
and that's why i know who i can really be someone with.
who i can be myself around.
and i'm scared for my future. i've fucked around for far too long, and i have to change that. but even saying it here, doesn't mean anything. i wallow in regret, for the grades i should have gotten, sports i should have kept playing, instruments i should have practiced. all my life i've just let things go, just let them drop to the ground, and i really can't do that anymore.
but i can't trust myself to follow those instructions.
but it's nice to have people to come sit on the trampoline with me, wrapped in our separate sarcophoguses, enjoying each other's company and friendship.
but so many things seem to be falling apart,
i'm falling apart.
it's scary.
it really is.
and that's why i know who i can really be someone with.
who i can be myself around.
and i'm scared for my future. i've fucked around for far too long, and i have to change that. but even saying it here, doesn't mean anything. i wallow in regret, for the grades i should have gotten, sports i should have kept playing, instruments i should have practiced. all my life i've just let things go, just let them drop to the ground, and i really can't do that anymore.
but i can't trust myself to follow those instructions.
but it's nice to have people to come sit on the trampoline with me, wrapped in our separate sarcophoguses, enjoying each other's company and friendship.
but so many things seem to be falling apart,
i'm falling apart.
it's scary.
it really is.