Apr 26, 2008 04:34
the thoughts wont let me be...
i remember over and over that sunday afternoon
easter this year, my family had a picnic up in the hills of chino
Cindy and i decided to go for a walk, or a hike
we jumped a fence and ventured up part of the hills
where about 6 horses roamed free (seemingly)
it was amazing
and she said: "you know...we've had some fun adventures together"
i dont think ill ever forget that moment
simply because
i dont want it to be something that must be left
as past tense
as what was, and wont be again
as times relegated to memories of better days
it's on my mind, more and more
for the fact that ive shared with only very few of you
because it hurts me so much to believe it myself
the fact that only 10 weeks ago
Cindy was diagnosed with some form of an auto immune disease
as of yet we are not sure which one
but from what we can tell, the signs are pointing towards lupus
but i tell myself
i need to be strong
i need to be there for her whenever i can
i need to make more trips to irvine, like last night
i need to be her brother, and her friend
without making her feel singled out or scared
but, God...i simply dont know how