I say it a lot, but I really just want to run away. Leave this place.

[oh_a_o]

I'm home
& again- I hate it.
I want to cry.

I miss people
& being around them just makes it worse.
Especially when there's nothing you can do about it.
Especially when things have changed so much.
All I wanted to do was tell him how much I miss him...
& talk to him. Just him.
He doesn't have to leave her.
He doesn't have to kiss me.
He doesn't have to tell me he still cares about me.
I just wanted to talk to him.
That's it.

Maybe I'm asking too much. Maybe it just doesn't matter in the long run.
Maybe I'm a fool & need to learn to let go. Maybe I need to stop caring at all.

Maybe I'm selfish.

People act like I hate him.
But I don't -at all-. Things are just [weird].