Ugh. People..
Brr, I'm always cold when I'm in here on the computer. My hands get numb and typing is hard =\ Weirdish.
So my life is pretty dull right now. I'm pretty frustrated with several things but I don't feel like going in to all of that. I've been thinking lately and I think I have come to realize that I just really don't like people all that much in general. I've become very cynical in the past few months unfortunately. Everyone just gets on my nerves all the time and I'm never content. There are a few that I can stand however. I just feel like I need to get away-away from school, from family, from friends, from my normal life. I don't want new friends or anything like that, I just want to be by myself all the time. I mean, Christmas break just ended and yet I feel like I never really had a "break". I don't know what I should do.
I'm going on the Sr High Retreat this weekend which isn't going to help this condition. I'm only going so I can hang out with Amanda. I think I would like to just get one, maybe two of my friends and just leave Memphis. Just go somewhere, anywhere. I don't care where, just as long as I can get away.
I'm reading On the Road right now and it really makes me want to get out, go travel, go away from where I am now. I guess what I really want right now is freedom, independence.
Anyways, I've started training for track again and I'm only a little bit motivated right now. I'm sure as the season approaches that motivation will return. I might be getting a personal trainer, this guy that Leah is using. I think she likes him and I really want to get better this season. I want to prove to myself that I don't always just have to be a mediocre runner. I'm not wanting to win region or anything like that, not at all; I just want to be content with my own accomplishments.
Oh! So I am happy about this: Chas is a candidate for our class's rep for King & Queen of hearts =) He asked Mallory and I'm also happy about that. I feel like Chas's dropping out last year was pretty much my fault so I really hope he gets it this year.
I think I'm going to go take a bath. I haven't taken a bath-bath in forever. Stupid showers.
So my life is pretty dull right now. I'm pretty frustrated with several things but I don't feel like going in to all of that. I've been thinking lately and I think I have come to realize that I just really don't like people all that much in general. I've become very cynical in the past few months unfortunately. Everyone just gets on my nerves all the time and I'm never content. There are a few that I can stand however. I just feel like I need to get away-away from school, from family, from friends, from my normal life. I don't want new friends or anything like that, I just want to be by myself all the time. I mean, Christmas break just ended and yet I feel like I never really had a "break". I don't know what I should do.
I'm going on the Sr High Retreat this weekend which isn't going to help this condition. I'm only going so I can hang out with Amanda. I think I would like to just get one, maybe two of my friends and just leave Memphis. Just go somewhere, anywhere. I don't care where, just as long as I can get away.
I'm reading On the Road right now and it really makes me want to get out, go travel, go away from where I am now. I guess what I really want right now is freedom, independence.
Anyways, I've started training for track again and I'm only a little bit motivated right now. I'm sure as the season approaches that motivation will return. I might be getting a personal trainer, this guy that Leah is using. I think she likes him and I really want to get better this season. I want to prove to myself that I don't always just have to be a mediocre runner. I'm not wanting to win region or anything like that, not at all; I just want to be content with my own accomplishments.
Oh! So I am happy about this: Chas is a candidate for our class's rep for King & Queen of hearts =) He asked Mallory and I'm also happy about that. I feel like Chas's dropping out last year was pretty much my fault so I really hope he gets it this year.
I think I'm going to go take a bath. I haven't taken a bath-bath in forever. Stupid showers.