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[ofsnow]

i just feel...exhausted. i'm not sure i ever sleep at night, part of my mind, many parts, are always awake. but in the daylight it's different, in the day i can sleep. i've never been on a normal sleep schedule

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[ofsnow]

yeah, what i mean is more that even when i'm considered physically asleep, my mind does not rest, and i have no benefit, or at least none really significant, from sleeping. i've been napping in the afternoons when i can, which seems to help, but i hate the fact i can't sleep without my scalp being wet (wet hair), even if i take some klonipin or resort to gabapentin for a headache....
cheesy tots are one of those probably MASSIVELY unhealthy foods that oddly don't make me sick, because they're probably totally processed. i claim addiction to sodium and/or potassium benzoates (which may not be as illogical as people want me to believe, but, eh, won't go into that here), food preservatives. and i get sick worse when i eat breakfast, at least usually; my mother thinks it may be an enzyme deficiency or something, because i have at least one cousin and aunt affected by the same non-pregnancy related 'morning sickness' (and my mother should be included, because she has that problem, compounded by hypoglycemia). could be allergies. i'd experiment on all of us with just about anything, but i'm not technically qualified at all, and people would probably say it's unethical. maybe i should just get those cousins/aunts to provide medical records or blood samples for diagnostic purposes (yeah, right......that's the least likely thing to happen)....