dream 2; i've lost so much along the way
Warnings: Heavy G.U. spoilers.
Notes: Viewer will feel a heavy sadness a sense of deep betrayal and anger along with frustration. Ends with grief.
[Filtered away from Silabus: ///, half-way filtered from Atoli ]
“Welcome, to The World.”
“You have a special power, Haseo.” His name was Ovan. He was a mysterious player in the world and guildmaster of The Twilight Brigade. He thought it was a load of junk, to be honest. Yet somehow he still ended up joining…those memories, with Shino, the girl in pink, and Ovan, who always came and went, Tabi, Sakisaka, Phyllo..
--Came abruptly to an end.
///
Shino was falling. Falling and he couldn’t catch her. Her body broke off into bits and pieces of light in his arms, as she placed her hand to his face and said in a soft, hushed voice, “Don’t cry. Boys don’t cry..so you shouldn’t cry..” Her smile for him was so genuine and kind--..he screamed within the Hulle Granz Cathedral, the only thing in his heart was vengeance then.
On the altar, the symbol that had killed Shino shined, and his mind flashed to the image of a >player with pronged twinblades, his face stitched and body covered in blue fire. “Tri-Edge..” Was the only sound out of his mouth.
(Somewhere in the real world, a boy watched a girl with Shino’s face lying in a hospital bed, the beep-beeps signaling what was: A coma. )
////
He stood in Arche Koeln, the waterfall roaring around them. In his mind flashed memories, of Shino, Ovan and he standing together watching, waiting-for something. Now it was Ovan, Ovan who left him and the rest, Ovan who disbanded the Twilight Brigade. Ovan who now said, “It was such a small seed..so I decided to raise it.”
--He was stronger now. The Terror of Death, who killed Player Killers and was on a hunt for revenge. He wouldn’t fail…and yet--..
Soon after those words he found ‘Tri-Edge’ at the scene of the crime, who he assumed was nothing less but what he thought he was. He thought he could defeat him. But instead, his body cracked into pieces, and he was at square one. As weak and as armorless as he first started the game. When he first met Ovan. As he skimmed through his empty emails, Ovan’s name appeared with a single message:
“You have two paths before you. One will lead to safety and shame..it is a path where you give up the World and never log in again.”
(Could he really keep playing in a World that sent Shino into a coma?! No way in hell! No way..)
“Let me be blunt. The latter path is tortuous and will threaten both your mind
and body. Once you have chosen it, there will be no turning back. The other is of peril and pride.
If you still choose to walk this path, then there will come a time when you and
I will meet once again in "The World."
When the time comes I will once again say this to you:
Welcome to "The World."
Haseo made his choice. And logged back into The World. And his quest to become stronger-to kill TriEdge and avenge Shino-in a world where the game was only an illusion.
Throughout it Ovan kept giving him emails, visiting at random times, leaving cryptic messages..until finally he left another message. Words he barely skimmed as he went to the place this journey began. The Cathedral. Where Ovan waited..
/////
(“What is it that you want from me?!” He screamed, he was so sick of Ovan’s random shortmails, of his cryptic words, how he was always one step ahead yet never told him anything! Why?! WHY?!
Ovan smiled at him in the Cathedral. “To become stronger. To consume all happiness and sadness..that will be your stepping stone.”
“Even if you manage to destroy Tri-Edge, you will only uncover a small part of a truth…” )
/////
He lost more friends to AIDA, ghostly black spots in the world that sent people into comas. Just like Tri-Edge did..
(“AIDA is an abnormality in the World. People who get attacked by AIDA..become Lost Ones and don’t wake up. “ Pi’s words had basically summed up what he had feared. And his mind flashed to Shino in the hospital….and felt sick. ")
Once again he and Ovan crossed paths. In a strange place.
“Haseo, let me show you how those scars are made. Do not be afraid. Burn this into your eyes! Look closely Haseo, this is the truth you’ve been searching for..!”
Which is why he didn’t understand now, as he stood before Ovan, in this area, staring at him making the same symbol Tri-Edge used when he killed Shino, where Alkaid had been PKed in Coithe Bodher, who now before him, had a sickly black arm growing out of where his sealed up right arm had been. Spots of AIDA. Ovan was Tri-Edge all along.
Ovan is..Tri-Edge…
Memories flashed in his mind, of Shino falling, of Alkaid crumpling in his arms, of Atoli, her arm, her injured arm---of the pain she suffered because of AIDA! Ovan had been behind everything! The pain he felt, the betrayal, the grief-this man who he thought might have somehow been on his side-somehow helping him along. Was USING him. Someone he trusted-how-how had this…
Ovan left him in a stupor, "I will be waiting for you in Megan Fi."
//////
He came with Atoli and the others, so sure he had found the answer! Ovan stood on the ancient city's inner sanctum and stared out into the inky, rainy night..
“Come to think of it…everything may have begun to spin out of control at this place. Don’t you think so, Haseo? But there is no going back now. “ He continued to stare out at the pixilated fireflies and the stormy sky above them. “After all, my entire life I’ve given to the World was just for this day. “
Haseo’s voice came out harsh and sharp, “You were the one who PKed Shino? “
“Yes.”
“Furthermore, I am also the one who drew in Sakaki, and gave him AIDA.”
Sakaki, who had used Atoli, who had made her fight against him-who went through so much pain because of that bastard! Everything, all these months were falling apart with each word Ovan said!
“But why? Why would you do that?!”
“For you, Haseo.”
“Me?”
“To make you grow up strong.”
“Just for something like that?! You..”
“Something like this, that’s not it. Everything was part of necessary process..”
Once again the images of Atoli, Shino, Alkaid..all of them drifted in his mind. Their suffering-their needless suffering.
“Thanks to you..Shino..and Alkaid…--And Atoli! “
His voice was a low growl.
“You’ll pay for this. You will…PAY!”
Once again Ovan’s sickly AIDA-infected arm came to appear, and Haseo stared half-mesmerized, but ready, as Ovan said,
“Now, Haseo--..surpass your limits! Become strong…and then---“
“KILL ME!”
---as Haseo surged into battle, screaming his name.
//////
The battle ended, and Haseo assumed he had destroyed Ovan. But it had been a lie. Once again, he was on a pursuit of a truth he wasn’t sure he believed in anymore. Ovan was TriEdge, so if he killed him..wouldn’t Shino and the others have come back?
It was only after a few months that he heard from Ovan again…and was given a meeting point. Once again, he was on a goosechase to confront a man he had trusted and long been betrayed by. ( From the very beginning…! )
In the wooded area of the dungeon, Yata paused and stared at Haseo, quietly saying, “I feel like…Ovan is waiting for you, Haseo. “ To which he had no reply.
And so--..once again, Haseo entered an area with his friends, facing a man he thought he had defeated. Destroyed upon his request..and his own desire for justice.
From above on a raised mound of pixels, a girl in a wheelchair watched them with dull eyes, as Haseo stared at her, Ovan impassively watching. “That ghost girl..” He began, but Ovan cut him off. His ghostly arm wavering, twitching like a grotesque thing on his body where his sealed up arm would have been.
Ovan was controlling AIDA, or was it controlling him? Haseo curtly cut off his explanations, “Enough talk. Do you know of a way to cure Shino and the Lost Ones?”
He could feel Ovan’s smile, and hated it. “A way to return those..who can’t come home?” He paused, before he pressed his good hand to his face, and began to laugh. “Hahaa…haha…hahahah!” He broke off into an almost crazy sort of laugh, but to Haseo it sounded sad, and it twisted inside of him. He smiled at him again.
“It is easy enough to change things, Haseo. Bringing things back to the way they were, is difficult. Let me give you a simple example, how would you go about separating milk and tea that had been completely mixed together?” His smile grew.
“You cannot, and in fact, there is no need to..”
Haseo snarled out, “You..”
Ovan took on a fighting stance.
“However, if you can manage to defeat me, there is a slim chance Shino’s consciousness may return..however that is a one in a million chance. There is no certainty what so ever. Haha….hahahahha…hahahahaha!” He broke off into that twisted laughter.
“Ovan, you bastard! “ He roared, and Ovan laughed all the more.
“Now, destroy me, Haseo! You see, if you want your truth…you must take it from me!”
Haseo screamed as he once again for the second time, charged at Ovan, with all the intention to do just that. Destroy him. And he thought he did, but Ovan was still standing.
“That’s not good enough..that’s not enough Haseo! What’s wrong Haseo, is that the limit of your strength?!” Ovan snapped, and Haseo could feel the literal plead in his words, Give me more, Haseo-you’re not good enough!
“Destroy me! Devour me! Tear me to bits! Come Haseo..use your Avatar-your grim reaper that’s devoured seven of the eight..”
His voice was weak.
“Destroy me so that I can never revive again!
To bring Shino back… YOU MUST DEVOUR ME ENTIRELY!!"
////
Suddenly Ovan’s body began to glow a bright blue. “Come the Rebirth, Corbenik!”
The world around them dissolved, into empty, starry sky. Ovan’s body disappeared, and in it’s place, a monster floated towards him. His right arm, where Ovan’s disgusting black clawed appendage had been was warped beyond recognition, worse than the last time they had fought. It was half his body, and he could see from where he stood that it caused horrible pain.
What had Ovan always said…?
Haseo…there’s no time. No more time…
(Was this---wait-Ovan! )
This was his Avatar. And so, Haseo realized…Ovan, you’re serious about this…fine. I’ll do it. If that’s what you really want…and if that will..grant you your wish..-
And Haseo’s body also faded until in his place was a monster holding a Scythe, looking fierce and determined. They began to fight, two Avatars, two people, in a game that wasn’t a game.
Ovan, no, Corbenik, began to attack with his massive arm, his body sagging from the force of the strain. Haseo could see how deeply AIDA was killing Ovan’s player, and he finally understood what he meant by no time. He was holding back from AIDA controlling him by force of will..
I’ve got to end this..for everyone’s sake!
He thought bitterly, as Haseo, who was now using his Avatar, Skeith, began to plunge after him.
“Surpass your limits!”
Ovan shouted at him from the monster he controlled. He deflected a ray of shots with his scythe, moving in for the kill. Ovan’s triumphant voice echoed in his ears, “Yes, destroy me Haseo, for Aina and this world!! “
“OVANNN!!!”
He shouted, as Skeith aimed his arm at the creature, a beam of some sort of light aimed at the creature, sealing it’s doom.
With a final cry of dismay, Haseo found himself once again in the Creator’s room. Ovan stood before him, his twisted, skeletal arm sagging as he offered a gasping shudder of breath, “Good…ah..the rebirth, the power of hope..” Haseo stood before him.
“The final wave, the surge of rebirth..”
/////
“So you used the Terror of Death as a key to the resurrection..was that a part of your plan all along, Ovan?” Yata stared at Ovan, barely standing, but at that instant, all of them, save for Haseo were warped out of the area in a surge of orange light.
“Your deductions are always so close and yet so far, Yata..” Haseo didn’t understand. What was Ovan saying? He made this all sound like some sort of scheme a plot he wasn’t aware of..
“Then what was your aim with all this? “ He demanded, staring at him with confusion in his bright red eyes.
“My goal was to save my little sister, who was a Lost One..”
Haseo’s eyes were once again riveted to the little girl in the chair. “Aina, my sister, was probably the first Lost One…the AIDA in my arm..” That sickly claw..
“I did that to her..I created the Twilight Brigade and looked for a way to cure her..but then came Shino…”
He didn’t need to hear this! Ovan was actually -he was-if this was true then why hadn’t he just told him this from the beginning?! He could have saved him too instead of this!
But like a robot programmed to finish a report, Ovan continued, each word stabbing into his heart.
“The Rebirth..is a failsafe triggered by the Creator of the World.
A reinitialization program that restarts the World…but only the fully awakened Terror of Death can is capable of activating it..”
“Me?”
“And now I will release it’s power throughout the internet!”
“Hey wait a minute if you do that won’t it initialize the entire network?! “ Haseo demanded as Ovan added wearily, “AIDA is hiding throughout the entire network, this is the only way to erase it..”
“This is a gamble..but I believe it is something worth betting on..” Ovan said as the ground around them began to shake. Ovan had done it. The world was being reprogrammed..did this mean AIDA would be gone forever?
“Even if you’re putting everything you are on the line?” Haseo continued, staring at him with shock. Hurt.
“Yes..heh….” Ovan laughed weakly, as if he were trying to stay connected to his controller. It was too much for Haseo to bear, as memories flashed by, all his journey, all the people he lost, people he loved, Ovan-who felt he had to do this all by himself!
“You bastard! “
Haseo croaked, “Why didn’t you ever trust me?! And why--Why didn’t you really believe in me?! Tell me!”
(I could have helped you..)
“I did believe you..” Ovan began softly, “That is why I chose you, “ (Haseo you have a special power..) “Why I protected you..” (Ovan hovering over his body, offering his hand..) “Why I raised you like I did..” (It was such a small seed..)
“You responded better than I could have dreamed..thank you Haseo.”
Haseo didn’t want to hear it, and a sob was in his throat. All this time-for what? This? Now he was apologizing?! Thanking him?!
“That’s it?! Now you finally come clean and now you think everything’s been straightened out?! This close to the end?! When things have gotten this bad?! “ The ground continued to shake..
“Tell me, how many people do you think you’ve hurt since this started?!
How many have grieved?! How many have suffered?!”
He grit the words out in a rage, his voice cracking,
“You’ve stepped on so many people, just so you could achieve your self-serving dream!
NO ONE HAS THAT RIGHT! Everybody grieves..everybody suffers! “
“Everybody has truths they want to ignore!”
“You are not special, you’re just like everyone else! OVANNN!!”
And Ovan did what he always did..he smiled. The bastard.
“Everyone’s dream is special…no matter how terribly insignificant or grand it may be..there’s no difference between any of them.."
And Ovan used the last of his strength to wrap his arms around his little sister, as the world literally began to fade into pieces of bright light, Haseo thrown by the blast. "Now Aina is the time to be set free!" Ovan cried, as he began to be blown away by the force of the Rebirth. Haseo was riveted by the sight of Ovan's content, tired smile as his body completely dissolved..
//
Ovan turned and smiled at him, everything was white noise. "And ending is just a part of a new beginning, don't you think that's true?"
Haseo reached out his hand...
//
And woke up.
---------
You stupid..selfish...bastard..--so..stupid..
[his hand covers his face, feeling a moistness in the back of his eyes as he checked his dreamberry, flipping through the device..a pause.]
...
[his face was shadowed, as Haseo, his voice curt, slightly choked, came out: ]
To those that..'knew' Ovan..--if anyone ever did--[he gritted out the next words, a choking sound in his throat. ] ..he's gone.
[ and he pushes down hard on the button, shutting it off to hold back the tangry ears that slip.]