003 - [voice post] let's get this party started.
[hear that slamming of cupboards and shuffling around of various pots and pans and boxes of cereal that are only empty cardboard? yes, Cocytus does, too, perhaps that is part of his irritation, but not all of it. he's obviously on the phone, digging around for something that doesn't SUCK.]
My fucking meatbag skinsuit THING is BROKEN.
What if it gets worse? [DING. wrong thing to think about, because the near panic in his voice sets in almost immediately.] Oh my FUCK, I need to fix it now. Where's the ass I need to kiss to get a new one?
[let it be known that a restless Cocytus is... really not something you want around, ever. there's a thud of feet on the ground and then a whine and the very distinct sound of scratching (or at least attempting to scratch) through denim.]
I just got this piece of shit, it should be lasting me like... the next sixty years, but no, Cronus that cheapskate bitch has to give me a rip-off.
Ow, motherfucker, what the hell... Ow. Fix itttttttt. I get hungry and I get itchy and Tartarus' crusty ballsack, this sucks so much, thi-
[he stops dead in the middle of his word and the phone clatters onto a surface, probably the counter-top since it doesn't break, and what can be heard is 100% certified Cocytus brand wailing. we're very sorry neighbors, Phantasos, very sorry.]
WHAT IF I HAVE CANCER I DON'T WANNA SHAVE MY HEAD!
My fucking meatbag skinsuit THING is BROKEN.
What if it gets worse? [DING. wrong thing to think about, because the near panic in his voice sets in almost immediately.] Oh my FUCK, I need to fix it now. Where's the ass I need to kiss to get a new one?
[let it be known that a restless Cocytus is... really not something you want around, ever. there's a thud of feet on the ground and then a whine and the very distinct sound of scratching (or at least attempting to scratch) through denim.]
I just got this piece of shit, it should be lasting me like... the next sixty years, but no, Cronus that cheapskate bitch has to give me a rip-off.
Ow, motherfucker, what the hell... Ow. Fix itttttttt. I get hungry and I get itchy and Tartarus' crusty ballsack, this sucks so much, thi-
[he stops dead in the middle of his word and the phone clatters onto a surface, probably the counter-top since it doesn't break, and what can be heard is 100% certified Cocytus brand wailing. we're very sorry neighbors, Phantasos, very sorry.]
WHAT IF I HAVE CANCER I DON'T WANNA SHAVE MY HEAD!