SCENE: Meekins and Jake in "Talking Man-to-Man"
Jake: ((like a woman waits to be made love to, that drink is waiting to be drunk))
Meekins: ( I am so taking notes from you, sir. )
Jake: ((oh god don't get into the metaphor thing Meekins))
Jake: ((...well no, lemme hear you try))
Meekins: ( ahem! your purity is like a withering flower. is this a metaphor sir?)
Jake: ((that's a simile, son))
Jake: ((a bad one at that))
Meekins: *Meekins is making his way through a large crowd, piles of bags hanging off both arms and a couple pulled close to his chest. The mall is incredibly busy today, even though holiday shopping is far from the minds of the people around him. The blinking lights of a nearby burrito stand in the food court catches his interest as he pushes past a couple of people who give him nasty glares as he accidentally hits them on his way to the register. he quickly orders his food, which actually takes about 20 minutes due to forgetting where his wallet went (then going on to fumble with it) and takes a seat at a nearby table to enjoy his meal*
Jake: *just as Meekins sit downs, a familiar voice calls out to him* Meekins! Fancy runnin' into you here, compadre. *Jake walks up to his table with a friendly smile, comparatively empty-handed; in fact, he's not carrying anything*
Meekins: *Meekins's fork is halfway to his mouth when he hears Jake call his name. Upon recognition, he immediately salutes with his right hand, the fork still in hand, which sends the food that was previously stuck to it flying through the air* Jake Marshall sir! It really is a coincidence! What are you doing at the mall, sir?
Jake: *his eyes follow the piece of flying food briefly before he looks back at the man* Came here to renew the license that allows me to ride my steed in the eyes of the law. Takin' the long trail back, since I haven't been inside one o' these things in a while. *notices the enormous pile of bags* Ah... You got a pack mule for those?
Meekins: I don't own one, sir! I live quite close by, so I will be carrying them myself. I... will be my own pack mule, sir! *digs into his food again, this time actually eating it*
Jake: *grabs the other chair and seats himself -- he's got a few minutes to kill* So what's all that, then? *studies the bags, seeing some colourful plastic things poking through* Christmas ornaments...?
Meekins: Er, yes, sir! I've decided that if I wanted to do my holiday shopping, it'd be best to do it early. *takes this time to basically inhale half of his food* You wouldn't believe the sale they had on the Christmas lawn gnomes, sir!
Jake: *wonders for a second if Meekins actually lives in a house and has a lawn, then quickly discards the thought-- he'd probably keep them in his bathroom or something* Always good to be prepared. I reckon you got your place decked out for Hallow's Eve.
Meekins: *wipes his mouth slowly, processing what Jake meant by "Hallow's Eve--* Oh! Well, about that, sir... it's actually not that decked at all. I had it all planned out sir, before fall even rolled around, sir. It would either be Halloween, or Christmas, that I would go all out, sir! Needless to say, it was a very tough decision -- one the toughest I've ever made in my entire life, sir! *takes the tray and dumps it into a trash can that happened to be directly behind his seat*
Jake: I can believe it. They're both fine holidays with fine themes. *pauses* Say, you mind stickin' your right arm out toward me for a smidge?
Meekins: *without hesitation, Meekins thrusts his right arm out in front him* Is there something wrong my arm, sir?
Jake: *it happens so quickly, Meekins doesn't have time to react -- Jake reaches out his right hand to the other man's, grabbing ahold of something there, and his left sweeps by half an inch below with a knife*
Jake: Loose thread. It was botherin' me. *shows Meekins his kill before tossing it aside and putting away his weapon*
Meekins: *Meekins's face goes white as a sheet, mostly due to the sheer quickness of Jake's hand, but then relaxes as he breathes out heavily through his nose* T-Thank you, sir... that was most impressive sir! So much, that my hand started tingling a little.
Jake: *nudges up on the rim of his hat* No problemo, hombre. *the subject of Christmas has him thinking about certain aspects of the holiday, and he's reminded of one of Meekins' journal entries* The yuletide season's all about warmth, togetherness... Got anyone in mind for who you'd wanna spend it with?
Meekins: *is quiet for a moment, as if he was realllly thinking about this* ....to be honest, sir... *pauses, then salutes, a hint of a tear in one of his eyes* I... I HAVE NOBODY, SIR. NOT A SOUL IN THE WORLD. WHAT ABOUT YOU, SIR?!
Jake: *chuckles a bit -- he expected as much* Hey now, don't get all-fired down. You ain't at the end of your hay, and you ain't the only one in the same priminary. *looks a bit thoughtful* I was a lone wolf left out in the winter cold for years... but this time, can't say I can relate. I'll be spendin' it with the Skye ladies.
Meekins: That was very poetic, sir. Until it got to the end, anyway, sir. *feels a little disappointed, being the only single man out of the two, but nods thoughtfully, rubbing his chin* So, chief prosecutor Ms Lana Skye, sir? I don't mean any offense, sir, but she's very scary to be around sometimes. How is it like to be her man, sir?
Jake: *smirks and sits back in his seat* Like with any wild mare, you spend enough time gettin' to know 'em and their behavioural patterns, they'll quiet down enough to let you pet 'em. And if you treat 'em right, they'll give you a chance to get even closer. My baby, she's inside me now... I made 'er a place to settle down. It's close to my heart -- she likes the sound.
Meekins: *has his hands propped up on the table, his head resting in his palms. there's a dreamy look on his face* That was... beautiful, sir! I know EXACTLY what you mean, sir! *sighs, then he brings a can of sprite to his attention. he had nearly forgotten about it...*
Jake: *a somewhat skeptical look* You do?
Meekins: Um, no, actually. Not really, sir... *looks down sadly, hugging the can closer* I just thought it'd be more interesting if I said I did, sir.
Jake: Hey, don't feel the need to put on any sorta front. This ain't nothin' but a man-to-man talk, y'hear? *smiles* I ain't your superior no more.
Meekins: I... I realize that sir, but you will always be my superior, sir! But regardless, you have no idea how happy this makes me, sir! To be allowed to just be myself and have this sort of conversation with you, sir! *even adds a small happy sniffle*
Jake: *in an odd way... he's missed this sort of interaction with Meekins* You may could act more natural 'round the ladies. Might save you some trouble and win some hearts -- *points* else you'll be spendin' Christmas cuddled up to that there can of soda.
Meekins: *rubs his chin for a while, thinking hard about something* Then... then that means I shouldn't drink this, doesn't it, sir?! That is... just in case, sir. *clenches the can*
Jake: *lowers his head, obscuring the view of his eyes with his hat* No, son. That drink was meant to be consumed and you'd best let it fulfill its purpose.
Meekins: *loosens his grip on the can* Oh... yes, of course, sir! I suppose I should do that right away before continuing my search for the perfect Christmas tree... *takes a napkin and cleans the rim of the soda, wiping away any dirt that's been collecting in it. then proceeds to pick at the tab*
Jake: You goin' for a genuine pine? *leans forwards, resting his elbow on the table* Gotta say -- mighty ambitious for a bachelor.
Meekins: I... to be honest, I'm not really ambitious at all, sir! *salutes* Especially when it comes to the condition of my wallet, sir!
Jake: *a little puzzled* Why all the decorations, then?
Meekins: *scratches his head, a little sheepishly* Well, sir... when I arrived at the mall to shop, I had planned on buying the tree first, then the decorations, sir. But... it seems like I got too carried away, sir, and now I am paying the price! A fake tree is something I'm forced to call "perfect", sir!
Jake: Like throwin' yourself a hootenanny, ain't it? Doesn't sound too bad. I remember my first Christmas alone. *thinks* Naw ...scratch that.
Meekins: Oh, you're lucky, sir. It's probably for the best that you don't remember.... *with a sigh, he opens his soda… which promptly breaks off in his hand*
Jake: *a couple of beats pass as his eyes flick from the drink trapped in the can to Meekins' face and back to the can; he pulls out his knife and swiftly brings it down, giving the can top a good stab with its tip* You may be right. *wriggles it a bit to create an opening before pulling out* Least I stayed in the apartment and didn't go nowhere -- I hope and pray I didn't, at least.
Meekins: *pulls both his hands back quickly with a squeak, then stares at the can, then at the knife, then up at jake's face* T-Thank you, sir! *takes a noisy sip and is back to normal as if nothing had never happened* I am quite sure I stayed at home, too, sir... but why do you hope and pray, sir?
Jake: *returns his knife to his backpocket as he looks off to the side, contemplatively* You ever been so soaked with cactus juice, you couldn't stay on your heels?
Meekins: *stares at jake with an intense look* ...I, I don't really drink, sir. So no, I haven't, sir!
Jake: *looks straight at Meekins with a serious face* Keep far away from the bottle, no matter how lonely. It ain't meant for you unfortunate types.
Meekins: *gulps, then salutes with much vigor* Y-Yes, sir! Absolutely, sir! I will avoid it like the plague, sir!!
Jake: Hmm... So you don't go to bars to meet women, then. Where's your main prowl?
Meekins: Sir, I don't have a main prowl. *says this as if it was totally obvious*
Jake: *flatly* Then how do you expect to find a girl?
Meekins: I-I...! *pauses* I don't know, sir. Does chatting with waitresses at my favorite restaurant count as a "prowl", sir...?
Jake: It's a start. *he's almost afraid to ask the next question but...* What do ya like to talk about?
Meekins: Me? Well, I guess mostly about my job, sir. I don't really do much else besides that.
Jake: Doesn't sound too bad. What about it do you talk about, then?
Meekins: Normally, my job as a bailiff isn't all too exciting, sir, as you know. I just... do as I'm told, sir. So, I try to spice things up a little in my explanations... *trails off a little, fiddling with his fingers* But sometimes... I think I get too into it, sir, and scare people away!!
Jake: *points at him with two fingers* There. You see? That's what I'm talkin' about. You're over-ambitious, when all you gotta do is relax 'n' be yourself.
Meekins: *looks stunned* Relax, sir....? I, well... I think I could give that a try, sir.
Meekins: But sometimes I can't tell if I'm relaxed or not, sir! I'm so used to being this way, sir... how can I tell?!
Jake: *doesn't even stop to look the man over* For starters, you could let the tension go in your shoulders -- you're about as relaxed as a rat scurryin' across a barbed wire fence.
Meekins: *furrows his brow and tries to relax* Um, like this, sir? *it takes him a while, since relaxing both shoulders is tough he tries to do it one by one, which from afar makes him look like a twitching mess*
Jake: *a few beats pass* Practice it in the mirror when you get home. You got some shoppin' to focus on.
Meekins: R-Right, sir! *stands right up, almost knocking his chair over* I still need to find that tree before the stores start closing, sir! *starts to gather most of his things*
Jake: *smiles with a single nod* Better beat the rush 'fore all the gold's gone.
Meekins: *returns the nod, shortly followed by a salute* Thank you, sir, for all the advice! This conversation... I will not forget it, sir! *hangs all his shopping bags off his arms and attempts to teeter off*
Jake: *watches the tall man carefully as he sets off with too much baggage* You gonna be all right there, dogie? You look like you're settin' yourself up for a fall.
Meekins: Y-Yes, sir! I'm... quite-- *tries to go around a table but one of his bags get caught on something which causes meekins to stop and turn* Whoops! *as he tries to free himself, he trips backwards over a leg of a chair nearby. at the last minute, he reaches out to grab a table, just barely keeping himself from crashing to the floor*
Jake: *impressed* Huh! You've gotten better at catchin' yourself since I last saw you.
Meekins: Well, as they say, sir! Practice makes perfect, sir! *slowly eases himself up into a proper standing position* But to be honest, I just think luck is on my side today, sir! I sure hope it stays...
Jake: *stands up and idly re-adjusts his hat* Be more careful, y'hear? Wouldn't want you gettin' hurt!
Meekins: Yes, sir! *turns to walk away again, only to promptly slip on a banana peel. he crashes to the ground, but immediately picks himself up looking rather embarrassed* ...A-And thank you for your concern, sir! *doesn't wait for a response and speeds off*
Jake: *stares at the banana peel in near disbelief. When he looks up, the hapless man is gone -- he closes his eyes and shakes his head* Keep on keepin' on, you odd stick. *hands in his pockets, he walks up to the peel and hefts it up with the toe of his boot before kicking it off to the side and into the trash bin. He continues his stroll down the mall, whistling "Tumbling Tumbleweeds"*
~~~
Meekins: *it's only been a few minutes until a shrill cry comes from behind Jake. a small pine tree with very long legs approaches him with a bounce in its step. It's out of breath, probably due to running around the mall in search of the cowboy* Sir! Sir! I think... I may... have found The One, sir!
Jake: *stops dead in his tracks, turning to look behind him with a carefully neutral expression* Come again?
Meekins: *the bailiff's head peeks out from behind the plastic pine -- it is a tiny one, at that* The perfect tree, sir. It doesn't attract insects, is easy to take care of, portable, and above all was quite easy on my wallet, sir! What do you think, sir?
Jake: *looks the tree up and down -- it is a very nice tree. He simply gives a friendly smile and a tip of his hat* Looks like a perfect match. Hope you two have yourselves a mighty fine Christmas this year.
Meekins: We, too, hope you have a very Merry Christmas, sir! Of course, we know you will since you'll be sharing it with the woman you love, sir! *nods with an intense look in his eye, and probably too intensely -- he's gripping the tree around the trunk a bit too hard*
Meekins: *suddenly he jerks his hand back from the tree and his face pales considerably* A-Ah...! *a small cut is on his palm -- most likely due a loose piece of wood, or a nail, or something -- and a tiny drop of blood trickles out from it*
Jake: *eyes the injured finger, still keeping on his best smile* Your lil' arborous amigo's got some fight in 'er! She's a keeper, all right.
Meekins: *nods stiffly before going to reluctantly wiping the blood off on his uniform* Yes, sir.... she sure is, sir! I am very happy that you approve of her, sir! *salutes with a bit of difficulty, seeing as there are still many bags hanging off his arm*
Meekins: I should probably get going now, sir. It's still a bit of a walk to my place, sir!
Jake: *good-naturedly, without a hint of irony* Happy trails, pardner.
Meekins: Thank you, sir! You as well, sir! *walks away, successfully hitting at least five people and angering them on the way out*
Jake: *stands there for a moment, watching Meekins leave his sight for the second time* ...Hm. Wonder if he'd fancy a type like Magpie... *heads on home, pondering to himself*
Meekins: ( I am so taking notes from you, sir. )
Jake: ((oh god don't get into the metaphor thing Meekins))
Jake: ((...well no, lemme hear you try))
Meekins: ( ahem! your purity is like a withering flower. is this a metaphor sir?)
Jake: ((that's a simile, son))
Jake: ((a bad one at that))
Meekins: *Meekins is making his way through a large crowd, piles of bags hanging off both arms and a couple pulled close to his chest. The mall is incredibly busy today, even though holiday shopping is far from the minds of the people around him. The blinking lights of a nearby burrito stand in the food court catches his interest as he pushes past a couple of people who give him nasty glares as he accidentally hits them on his way to the register. he quickly orders his food, which actually takes about 20 minutes due to forgetting where his wallet went (then going on to fumble with it) and takes a seat at a nearby table to enjoy his meal*
Jake: *just as Meekins sit downs, a familiar voice calls out to him* Meekins! Fancy runnin' into you here, compadre. *Jake walks up to his table with a friendly smile, comparatively empty-handed; in fact, he's not carrying anything*
Meekins: *Meekins's fork is halfway to his mouth when he hears Jake call his name. Upon recognition, he immediately salutes with his right hand, the fork still in hand, which sends the food that was previously stuck to it flying through the air* Jake Marshall sir! It really is a coincidence! What are you doing at the mall, sir?
Jake: *his eyes follow the piece of flying food briefly before he looks back at the man* Came here to renew the license that allows me to ride my steed in the eyes of the law. Takin' the long trail back, since I haven't been inside one o' these things in a while. *notices the enormous pile of bags* Ah... You got a pack mule for those?
Meekins: I don't own one, sir! I live quite close by, so I will be carrying them myself. I... will be my own pack mule, sir! *digs into his food again, this time actually eating it*
Jake: *grabs the other chair and seats himself -- he's got a few minutes to kill* So what's all that, then? *studies the bags, seeing some colourful plastic things poking through* Christmas ornaments...?
Meekins: Er, yes, sir! I've decided that if I wanted to do my holiday shopping, it'd be best to do it early. *takes this time to basically inhale half of his food* You wouldn't believe the sale they had on the Christmas lawn gnomes, sir!
Jake: *wonders for a second if Meekins actually lives in a house and has a lawn, then quickly discards the thought-- he'd probably keep them in his bathroom or something* Always good to be prepared. I reckon you got your place decked out for Hallow's Eve.
Meekins: *wipes his mouth slowly, processing what Jake meant by "Hallow's Eve--* Oh! Well, about that, sir... it's actually not that decked at all. I had it all planned out sir, before fall even rolled around, sir. It would either be Halloween, or Christmas, that I would go all out, sir! Needless to say, it was a very tough decision -- one the toughest I've ever made in my entire life, sir! *takes the tray and dumps it into a trash can that happened to be directly behind his seat*
Jake: I can believe it. They're both fine holidays with fine themes. *pauses* Say, you mind stickin' your right arm out toward me for a smidge?
Meekins: *without hesitation, Meekins thrusts his right arm out in front him* Is there something wrong my arm, sir?
Jake: *it happens so quickly, Meekins doesn't have time to react -- Jake reaches out his right hand to the other man's, grabbing ahold of something there, and his left sweeps by half an inch below with a knife*
Jake: Loose thread. It was botherin' me. *shows Meekins his kill before tossing it aside and putting away his weapon*
Meekins: *Meekins's face goes white as a sheet, mostly due to the sheer quickness of Jake's hand, but then relaxes as he breathes out heavily through his nose* T-Thank you, sir... that was most impressive sir! So much, that my hand started tingling a little.
Jake: *nudges up on the rim of his hat* No problemo, hombre. *the subject of Christmas has him thinking about certain aspects of the holiday, and he's reminded of one of Meekins' journal entries* The yuletide season's all about warmth, togetherness... Got anyone in mind for who you'd wanna spend it with?
Meekins: *is quiet for a moment, as if he was realllly thinking about this* ....to be honest, sir... *pauses, then salutes, a hint of a tear in one of his eyes* I... I HAVE NOBODY, SIR. NOT A SOUL IN THE WORLD. WHAT ABOUT YOU, SIR?!
Jake: *chuckles a bit -- he expected as much* Hey now, don't get all-fired down. You ain't at the end of your hay, and you ain't the only one in the same priminary. *looks a bit thoughtful* I was a lone wolf left out in the winter cold for years... but this time, can't say I can relate. I'll be spendin' it with the Skye ladies.
Meekins: That was very poetic, sir. Until it got to the end, anyway, sir. *feels a little disappointed, being the only single man out of the two, but nods thoughtfully, rubbing his chin* So, chief prosecutor Ms Lana Skye, sir? I don't mean any offense, sir, but she's very scary to be around sometimes. How is it like to be her man, sir?
Jake: *smirks and sits back in his seat* Like with any wild mare, you spend enough time gettin' to know 'em and their behavioural patterns, they'll quiet down enough to let you pet 'em. And if you treat 'em right, they'll give you a chance to get even closer. My baby, she's inside me now... I made 'er a place to settle down. It's close to my heart -- she likes the sound.
Meekins: *has his hands propped up on the table, his head resting in his palms. there's a dreamy look on his face* That was... beautiful, sir! I know EXACTLY what you mean, sir! *sighs, then he brings a can of sprite to his attention. he had nearly forgotten about it...*
Jake: *a somewhat skeptical look* You do?
Meekins: Um, no, actually. Not really, sir... *looks down sadly, hugging the can closer* I just thought it'd be more interesting if I said I did, sir.
Jake: Hey, don't feel the need to put on any sorta front. This ain't nothin' but a man-to-man talk, y'hear? *smiles* I ain't your superior no more.
Meekins: I... I realize that sir, but you will always be my superior, sir! But regardless, you have no idea how happy this makes me, sir! To be allowed to just be myself and have this sort of conversation with you, sir! *even adds a small happy sniffle*
Jake: *in an odd way... he's missed this sort of interaction with Meekins* You may could act more natural 'round the ladies. Might save you some trouble and win some hearts -- *points* else you'll be spendin' Christmas cuddled up to that there can of soda.
Meekins: *rubs his chin for a while, thinking hard about something* Then... then that means I shouldn't drink this, doesn't it, sir?! That is... just in case, sir. *clenches the can*
Jake: *lowers his head, obscuring the view of his eyes with his hat* No, son. That drink was meant to be consumed and you'd best let it fulfill its purpose.
Meekins: *loosens his grip on the can* Oh... yes, of course, sir! I suppose I should do that right away before continuing my search for the perfect Christmas tree... *takes a napkin and cleans the rim of the soda, wiping away any dirt that's been collecting in it. then proceeds to pick at the tab*
Jake: You goin' for a genuine pine? *leans forwards, resting his elbow on the table* Gotta say -- mighty ambitious for a bachelor.
Meekins: I... to be honest, I'm not really ambitious at all, sir! *salutes* Especially when it comes to the condition of my wallet, sir!
Jake: *a little puzzled* Why all the decorations, then?
Meekins: *scratches his head, a little sheepishly* Well, sir... when I arrived at the mall to shop, I had planned on buying the tree first, then the decorations, sir. But... it seems like I got too carried away, sir, and now I am paying the price! A fake tree is something I'm forced to call "perfect", sir!
Jake: Like throwin' yourself a hootenanny, ain't it? Doesn't sound too bad. I remember my first Christmas alone. *thinks* Naw ...scratch that.
Meekins: Oh, you're lucky, sir. It's probably for the best that you don't remember.... *with a sigh, he opens his soda… which promptly breaks off in his hand*
Jake: *a couple of beats pass as his eyes flick from the drink trapped in the can to Meekins' face and back to the can; he pulls out his knife and swiftly brings it down, giving the can top a good stab with its tip* You may be right. *wriggles it a bit to create an opening before pulling out* Least I stayed in the apartment and didn't go nowhere -- I hope and pray I didn't, at least.
Meekins: *pulls both his hands back quickly with a squeak, then stares at the can, then at the knife, then up at jake's face* T-Thank you, sir! *takes a noisy sip and is back to normal as if nothing had never happened* I am quite sure I stayed at home, too, sir... but why do you hope and pray, sir?
Jake: *returns his knife to his backpocket as he looks off to the side, contemplatively* You ever been so soaked with cactus juice, you couldn't stay on your heels?
Meekins: *stares at jake with an intense look* ...I, I don't really drink, sir. So no, I haven't, sir!
Jake: *looks straight at Meekins with a serious face* Keep far away from the bottle, no matter how lonely. It ain't meant for you unfortunate types.
Meekins: *gulps, then salutes with much vigor* Y-Yes, sir! Absolutely, sir! I will avoid it like the plague, sir!!
Jake: Hmm... So you don't go to bars to meet women, then. Where's your main prowl?
Meekins: Sir, I don't have a main prowl. *says this as if it was totally obvious*
Jake: *flatly* Then how do you expect to find a girl?
Meekins: I-I...! *pauses* I don't know, sir. Does chatting with waitresses at my favorite restaurant count as a "prowl", sir...?
Jake: It's a start. *he's almost afraid to ask the next question but...* What do ya like to talk about?
Meekins: Me? Well, I guess mostly about my job, sir. I don't really do much else besides that.
Jake: Doesn't sound too bad. What about it do you talk about, then?
Meekins: Normally, my job as a bailiff isn't all too exciting, sir, as you know. I just... do as I'm told, sir. So, I try to spice things up a little in my explanations... *trails off a little, fiddling with his fingers* But sometimes... I think I get too into it, sir, and scare people away!!
Jake: *points at him with two fingers* There. You see? That's what I'm talkin' about. You're over-ambitious, when all you gotta do is relax 'n' be yourself.
Meekins: *looks stunned* Relax, sir....? I, well... I think I could give that a try, sir.
Meekins: But sometimes I can't tell if I'm relaxed or not, sir! I'm so used to being this way, sir... how can I tell?!
Jake: *doesn't even stop to look the man over* For starters, you could let the tension go in your shoulders -- you're about as relaxed as a rat scurryin' across a barbed wire fence.
Meekins: *furrows his brow and tries to relax* Um, like this, sir? *it takes him a while, since relaxing both shoulders is tough he tries to do it one by one, which from afar makes him look like a twitching mess*
Jake: *a few beats pass* Practice it in the mirror when you get home. You got some shoppin' to focus on.
Meekins: R-Right, sir! *stands right up, almost knocking his chair over* I still need to find that tree before the stores start closing, sir! *starts to gather most of his things*
Jake: *smiles with a single nod* Better beat the rush 'fore all the gold's gone.
Meekins: *returns the nod, shortly followed by a salute* Thank you, sir, for all the advice! This conversation... I will not forget it, sir! *hangs all his shopping bags off his arms and attempts to teeter off*
Jake: *watches the tall man carefully as he sets off with too much baggage* You gonna be all right there, dogie? You look like you're settin' yourself up for a fall.
Meekins: Y-Yes, sir! I'm... quite-- *tries to go around a table but one of his bags get caught on something which causes meekins to stop and turn* Whoops! *as he tries to free himself, he trips backwards over a leg of a chair nearby. at the last minute, he reaches out to grab a table, just barely keeping himself from crashing to the floor*
Jake: *impressed* Huh! You've gotten better at catchin' yourself since I last saw you.
Meekins: Well, as they say, sir! Practice makes perfect, sir! *slowly eases himself up into a proper standing position* But to be honest, I just think luck is on my side today, sir! I sure hope it stays...
Jake: *stands up and idly re-adjusts his hat* Be more careful, y'hear? Wouldn't want you gettin' hurt!
Meekins: Yes, sir! *turns to walk away again, only to promptly slip on a banana peel. he crashes to the ground, but immediately picks himself up looking rather embarrassed* ...A-And thank you for your concern, sir! *doesn't wait for a response and speeds off*
Jake: *stares at the banana peel in near disbelief. When he looks up, the hapless man is gone -- he closes his eyes and shakes his head* Keep on keepin' on, you odd stick. *hands in his pockets, he walks up to the peel and hefts it up with the toe of his boot before kicking it off to the side and into the trash bin. He continues his stroll down the mall, whistling "Tumbling Tumbleweeds"*
~~~
Meekins: *it's only been a few minutes until a shrill cry comes from behind Jake. a small pine tree with very long legs approaches him with a bounce in its step. It's out of breath, probably due to running around the mall in search of the cowboy* Sir! Sir! I think... I may... have found The One, sir!
Jake: *stops dead in his tracks, turning to look behind him with a carefully neutral expression* Come again?
Meekins: *the bailiff's head peeks out from behind the plastic pine -- it is a tiny one, at that* The perfect tree, sir. It doesn't attract insects, is easy to take care of, portable, and above all was quite easy on my wallet, sir! What do you think, sir?
Jake: *looks the tree up and down -- it is a very nice tree. He simply gives a friendly smile and a tip of his hat* Looks like a perfect match. Hope you two have yourselves a mighty fine Christmas this year.
Meekins: We, too, hope you have a very Merry Christmas, sir! Of course, we know you will since you'll be sharing it with the woman you love, sir! *nods with an intense look in his eye, and probably too intensely -- he's gripping the tree around the trunk a bit too hard*
Meekins: *suddenly he jerks his hand back from the tree and his face pales considerably* A-Ah...! *a small cut is on his palm -- most likely due a loose piece of wood, or a nail, or something -- and a tiny drop of blood trickles out from it*
Jake: *eyes the injured finger, still keeping on his best smile* Your lil' arborous amigo's got some fight in 'er! She's a keeper, all right.
Meekins: *nods stiffly before going to reluctantly wiping the blood off on his uniform* Yes, sir.... she sure is, sir! I am very happy that you approve of her, sir! *salutes with a bit of difficulty, seeing as there are still many bags hanging off his arm*
Meekins: I should probably get going now, sir. It's still a bit of a walk to my place, sir!
Jake: *good-naturedly, without a hint of irony* Happy trails, pardner.
Meekins: Thank you, sir! You as well, sir! *walks away, successfully hitting at least five people and angering them on the way out*
Jake: *stands there for a moment, watching Meekins leave his sight for the second time* ...Hm. Wonder if he'd fancy a type like Magpie... *heads on home, pondering to himself*