Calibration 9 [Accidental Video | Fountain Shard]

[officer_garrus]

[Video]

Click to view

[End Video]

[OOC: You all get a video because typing the whole thing out would take too long and I'm lazy. Part of the Fountain Shard Plot. Changed the lie from the original post, because this was easier and saved the trouble of finding another video. More details in the plot post for Garrus. CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR MASS EFFECT 1.]

Comments

time to break garrus

[doctor_tangent]

Wait. Why is Saren Arterius referring to that woman as "Shepard"?

poor Garrus

[officer_garrus]

Mordin, that's Shepard. Don't you recognize her?

Poor crew of the Normandy

[doctor_tangent]

What are you talking about? Shepard's male. Unless my understanding of human anatomy and my regular medical tests have suddenly been proven false... Fairly sure that Shepard isn't a woman.

[officer_garrus]

Mordin, is this a joke? Shepard's not a man. I think I of all turians would know whether Shepard was male or female.

[doctor_tangent]

[have the equivalence of an eyebrow raise from Mordin]

No joke. Don't joke with medical matters. Or about matters relating Shepard and the mission. Very certain that Shepard has and always been a man.

[officer_garrus]

[Confused turian is confused.]

Mordin, I know Shepard is a woman because... we're lovers. You even sent us medical tips on interspecies relations.

[doctor_tangent]

Never sent him ones on Human-Turian relations. Know that for a fact. Thought I needed to send him ones on Human-Quarian relations but turned out there was no relationship there. Er... Shouldn't have said that. Breaking doctor-client privilege. Still. Shepard isn't female. Unless he's suddenly develop a case of being a hermaphrodite.

[officer_garrus]

She's not, trust me. She does have a birthmark on her right thigh, but that's about it.

[doctor_tangent]

Do I need to show proof that Shepard's a he? Have medical scans proving he's a he.

[officer_garrus]

I have a picture of her with me to prove she's female.

[doctor_tangent]

Hmm. Is possible that this is side effect of the City. People can come from different times and places. Why not different realities? Both have Shepards... who just have a difference between who has an extra X versus a Y.

[officer_garrus]

Different realities... With different Shepards... [He puts a hand to his forehead.] I think I need to sit down.

[doctor_tangent]

Understand. Is the only conclusion I can find to fit our differing views that makes sense... as much as this place makes sense that is.

[officer_garrus]

Please tell me in your universe you're not actually a psychopath who's going to dissect me in my sleep. [Somehow he still has some snark in him.]

[doctor_tangent]

Nope. Still don't experiment on species capable of calculus. Don't tell me you went pacifist on us...

[officer_garrus]

And miss opportunities to blow the bad guys away, I don't think so.