im sorry i am hard to live iwth, but living is a problem for me

[off_the_record_]

yah its finally gottn to the point where i just cant deal

as if things werent bad enough i cant even follow through on simple commitments as 4-9
family
that word.. people just assume it means something, that its some title, well fuck titles.. just cause there is some blood relation shudnt allow some people to be families

if i stay here long enough they will be right about me, crazy
she can make anyone become that

ur talking to the girl that never cries, i dont think i cud have cried anymore then i have in the past month, all because of teh same person

i dont think i have ever been this fucked up . that is a lot to say, i cant think, i cant eat. or at;east keep it down, but lets juust stick a title on it and call the doctor= cause no one can talk to me anymore,

i just wish i cud breath and think and deal nromally again
ive let the pioeple i care about slip through, and the others get to me.

how cud i have let this happen. i just need to stop thinking things will be okay again,