Thoughts on life...
...by living it vicariously through my journal. In other words, it's time for a couple of rants.
Basically, I haven't been too happy with how my journal, my summer, and my life have turned out. I meant to read a great many books over the course of the summer (I managed to read Thus Spake Zarathustra once and am reading it again while still tossing around this idea I have for an essay about it in the back of my head--although the essay is being derailed as I'll need to actually buy a couple books I need for reference since Ferris doesn't have access to them), and that fell through although I can still at least get a couple done--in fact, after I write this I may just go downstairs and start reading Adorno. My summer/life have been a waste of playing video games and watching movies (and while the respite has been nice for my brain, it's starting to get quite old, and my brain is starting to go into some form of atrophy). Sure, I've lost a little weight over the summer, but that's more due to me not eating more than two small meals a day (or oftentimes just gorging myself on one meal).
So basically, with life/summer, I have little control over the larger factors that have been dominating it (read: grad school, lack of work, etc.) and this is really bothering me. I don't expect to have complete control of everything, but I do like having some foothold to show me that everything is working according to whatever the Fates have woven for me, and so far I'm getting a couple leads bu nothing solid. If (for whatever reason) this job at Ferris falls through (still no phone call today, by the bye; I'm planning on calling them tomorrow at some point), I've resigned myself to working at the local newspaper as they have two positions open and I'm more than qualified for the job. I say that I've resigned myself because this newspaper is such a joke that it would either ruin any potential career in news, or catapult me into a better job ("You were able to write and maintain AP style while writing for THAT hunk of junk? You've got some balls, Matt"). But at any rate, I still have no idea what's going to happen, and no control whatsoever as to what will happen and this bothers me.
On the other hand, there is something that I have complete control over: my journal.
I can dictate everything that happens or doesn't happen here. I have control. If I don't like how something looks, I can change it. Hel, if I don't like the layout of it, I can create my own style with some time! There is nothing here I can't change on a whim. Hence the revamped look. I've decided to go for a more professional look and feel to my journal (since I blatantly stole the idea from thecherrywench who has been going through similar ideas as me). So what does this mean for the journal? Easy, it means that this journal is going to take on two new faces.
Face 1: This will bethe public portion of my journal. Face 1 will include memes, essays (except any I might be nervous about being stolen for whatever reason), news stories, random occurrences in my life, and other such items as I deem fit.
Face 2: This will be the private (well, friends-locked) portion of my journal. Here's where I'll discuss the more personal items of my life that I don't want the internet at large to know about.
Pretty self-explanatory, I think.
Basically, I'm trying to regain a more professional edge to my journal and use this control as a focal point for getting my life back on track. First the journal, then my life, then the world!
Basically, I haven't been too happy with how my journal, my summer, and my life have turned out. I meant to read a great many books over the course of the summer (I managed to read Thus Spake Zarathustra once and am reading it again while still tossing around this idea I have for an essay about it in the back of my head--although the essay is being derailed as I'll need to actually buy a couple books I need for reference since Ferris doesn't have access to them), and that fell through although I can still at least get a couple done--in fact, after I write this I may just go downstairs and start reading Adorno. My summer/life have been a waste of playing video games and watching movies (and while the respite has been nice for my brain, it's starting to get quite old, and my brain is starting to go into some form of atrophy). Sure, I've lost a little weight over the summer, but that's more due to me not eating more than two small meals a day (or oftentimes just gorging myself on one meal).
So basically, with life/summer, I have little control over the larger factors that have been dominating it (read: grad school, lack of work, etc.) and this is really bothering me. I don't expect to have complete control of everything, but I do like having some foothold to show me that everything is working according to whatever the Fates have woven for me, and so far I'm getting a couple leads bu nothing solid. If (for whatever reason) this job at Ferris falls through (still no phone call today, by the bye; I'm planning on calling them tomorrow at some point), I've resigned myself to working at the local newspaper as they have two positions open and I'm more than qualified for the job. I say that I've resigned myself because this newspaper is such a joke that it would either ruin any potential career in news, or catapult me into a better job ("You were able to write and maintain AP style while writing for THAT hunk of junk? You've got some balls, Matt"). But at any rate, I still have no idea what's going to happen, and no control whatsoever as to what will happen and this bothers me.
On the other hand, there is something that I have complete control over: my journal.
I can dictate everything that happens or doesn't happen here. I have control. If I don't like how something looks, I can change it. Hel, if I don't like the layout of it, I can create my own style with some time! There is nothing here I can't change on a whim. Hence the revamped look. I've decided to go for a more professional look and feel to my journal (since I blatantly stole the idea from thecherrywench who has been going through similar ideas as me). So what does this mean for the journal? Easy, it means that this journal is going to take on two new faces.
Face 1: This will bethe public portion of my journal. Face 1 will include memes, essays (except any I might be nervous about being stolen for whatever reason), news stories, random occurrences in my life, and other such items as I deem fit.
Face 2: This will be the private (well, friends-locked) portion of my journal. Here's where I'll discuss the more personal items of my life that I don't want the internet at large to know about.
Pretty self-explanatory, I think.
Basically, I'm trying to regain a more professional edge to my journal and use this control as a focal point for getting my life back on track. First the journal, then my life, then the world!