"i suited up for the long walk back to myself..."
closer to the ground now,
with sorrow and stealth
*
i have to say, i'm not feeling as excited as i should.
on monday, i'm leaving long island, and new york, again and hopping aboard a cross-country train (the only mode of transportation left to get to the west coast after this will be by bicycle ;).
tuesday, i'll be in chicago, illinois for the second time.
friday, i'll be in portland, oregon for the first time ever.
by november 12th, i'll be in eugene, oregon, also for the first time.
the second half of november will be spent in the san francisco bay area (fourth time), with my aunt and oldest cousin.
less than a week after thanksgiving, i'll be in hawaii, working on a farm on the big island. i'm not sure where i'll be for christmas or new years yet.
and at the end of january, i'm flying down to new zealand on a one-way ticket, armed with a working holiday visa (which expires july '07), and Not Much Cash.
how did i plan all this? what do i want to happen? do i have any goals? i wish i knew more people who have gone off into the unknown, wish i had someone to talk to about how crazy my whole next few months feels. i feel like i have nothing to say goodbye to, and (hopefully) anything and everything to look forward to.
my hopes/wishes/goals:
*shave my head completely before i leave
*make lots of new friends in each destination
*write and send more postcards
*spend a couple months on a farm, or two, or three, in new zealand
*skydive for the third time, maybe in hawaii, definitely in new zealand
*do some major hiking (or "tramping", as the kiwis call it)
*eat endless new foods
*earn enough money at some job in new zealand (probably food service) to buy a plane ticket to somewhere else (if not back here)
*RELAX ABOUT MONEY
*get some real horseback riding experience
*learn to surf?
*learn to scuba dive, get certified
*visit some volcanoes, glaciers, and caves
*learn about polynesian culture (hawaii) and maori culture (new zealand)
*spend some time in western australia
*open myself up to more spontaneous adventures
*always, always practice gratitude
*learn about sailing, try to get work crewing on a boat
*let go of any middle-class securities and comforts that i grip too fiercely
*before hawaii or new zealand, meet the fabulous m00ngirl and the wonderful cranberrygirl13!
*trust myself and others more
*venture down to stewart island, the closest i'll probably ever get to antarctica
*kayak through abel tasman national park
*see live music! (we were spoiled at omega :)
*take care of my feet so as to prevent what happened last year in berlin
*develop more confidence in myself
*convince my sister (or anyone who wants) to come down and visit in the spring
*journal as much as possible
*photograph/marvel at the moeraki boulders in nz's oamaru region
*visit new omega friends from nz and friends of my old boss, ralph, both of whom live on the south island (yay, free accommodation that doesn't involve back-breaking work!)
*meditate
*live in another intentional community/retreat center [nz: awaawaroa bay eco-village, otamatea eco village, anahata community, moehau community, dharma gaia garden, hawaii: kalani oceanside retreat]
*if possible, extend the trip as much as i can-- more pacific islands, thailand, cambodia, india...?
perhaps the most vital thing to remember:
***try, desperately if need be, to hold on to everything that happened at omega, to everything i learned and everything i was a part of; set intentions and live them, allow for the universe to show me the way, release any fears up to the sky,
and breathe in deep
all of my as-of-yet-realized
possibility.
okay, i feel a bit better now. it's definitely beneficial to get specific with oneself before embarking on such a large, overwhelming thing. i am excited-- the whole thing's just too much to properly anticipate, really. i just need to take some deep breaths and look forward with as much of a positive, open mind as possible.
(eeeeeeeeek!!)
"life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." --helen keller
with sorrow and stealth
*
i have to say, i'm not feeling as excited as i should.
on monday, i'm leaving long island, and new york, again and hopping aboard a cross-country train (the only mode of transportation left to get to the west coast after this will be by bicycle ;).
tuesday, i'll be in chicago, illinois for the second time.
friday, i'll be in portland, oregon for the first time ever.
by november 12th, i'll be in eugene, oregon, also for the first time.
the second half of november will be spent in the san francisco bay area (fourth time), with my aunt and oldest cousin.
less than a week after thanksgiving, i'll be in hawaii, working on a farm on the big island. i'm not sure where i'll be for christmas or new years yet.
and at the end of january, i'm flying down to new zealand on a one-way ticket, armed with a working holiday visa (which expires july '07), and Not Much Cash.
how did i plan all this? what do i want to happen? do i have any goals? i wish i knew more people who have gone off into the unknown, wish i had someone to talk to about how crazy my whole next few months feels. i feel like i have nothing to say goodbye to, and (hopefully) anything and everything to look forward to.
my hopes/wishes/goals:
*shave my head completely before i leave
*make lots of new friends in each destination
*write and send more postcards
*spend a couple months on a farm, or two, or three, in new zealand
*skydive for the third time, maybe in hawaii, definitely in new zealand
*do some major hiking (or "tramping", as the kiwis call it)
*eat endless new foods
*earn enough money at some job in new zealand (probably food service) to buy a plane ticket to somewhere else (if not back here)
*RELAX ABOUT MONEY
*get some real horseback riding experience
*learn to surf?
*learn to scuba dive, get certified
*visit some volcanoes, glaciers, and caves
*learn about polynesian culture (hawaii) and maori culture (new zealand)
*spend some time in western australia
*open myself up to more spontaneous adventures
*always, always practice gratitude
*learn about sailing, try to get work crewing on a boat
*let go of any middle-class securities and comforts that i grip too fiercely
*before hawaii or new zealand, meet the fabulous m00ngirl and the wonderful cranberrygirl13!
*trust myself and others more
*venture down to stewart island, the closest i'll probably ever get to antarctica
*kayak through abel tasman national park
*see live music! (we were spoiled at omega :)
*take care of my feet so as to prevent what happened last year in berlin
*develop more confidence in myself
*convince my sister (or anyone who wants) to come down and visit in the spring
*journal as much as possible
*photograph/marvel at the moeraki boulders in nz's oamaru region
*visit new omega friends from nz and friends of my old boss, ralph, both of whom live on the south island (yay, free accommodation that doesn't involve back-breaking work!)
*meditate
*live in another intentional community/retreat center [nz: awaawaroa bay eco-village, otamatea eco village, anahata community, moehau community, dharma gaia garden, hawaii: kalani oceanside retreat]
*if possible, extend the trip as much as i can-- more pacific islands, thailand, cambodia, india...?
perhaps the most vital thing to remember:
***try, desperately if need be, to hold on to everything that happened at omega, to everything i learned and everything i was a part of; set intentions and live them, allow for the universe to show me the way, release any fears up to the sky,
and breathe in deep
all of my as-of-yet-realized
possibility.
okay, i feel a bit better now. it's definitely beneficial to get specific with oneself before embarking on such a large, overwhelming thing. i am excited-- the whole thing's just too much to properly anticipate, really. i just need to take some deep breaths and look forward with as much of a positive, open mind as possible.
(eeeeeeeeek!!)
"life is either a daring adventure, or nothing." --helen keller