The Things We Do For Love.
After my laptop crashed, I wrote a standalone out of boredom and with no intentions on showing anyone at all. Somehow, my best friend got me to send it to her and she liked it. She wants more and I'm working on it, for her... Anyway, I've decided to post it in my journal so that the people that read this thing (no one) can take a peak. If someone does actually read this, before I die of shock, leave me a comment about it, even if it's horribly, horribly mean.
This is Ryden because I lack creativity it just is. It's written in first person, from Ryan's point of view. There really are no warnings, other than my awful writing skills. No rating, either, simply because I'm too tired to rate it. I wish it had a title, but I'm terrible with those. The subject isn't meant to be a title but if it works for you, think of it like that. It's kind of fluffy, to be honest. Okay, kind of really fluffy. Obviously I don't own Ryan or Brendon because, well, I wouldn't be here if I did. Finally, I'll dedicate this to Alexis because I love her. :]
Also, if you have any ideas about how I should write the second part or of what I should include, please tell me. All ideas are appreciated.
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Standing there in the rain, getting soaked beyond comprehension, that's when it finally occurred to me that I'm the luckiest guy on earth...
---
Yeah, I talk to people I don't actually know on the Internet all the time. Shamelessly gaining friends every minute. I make real connections with these people. They're what I really love.
People here, I don't give two shits about them. I say I love them. I say they're my life. I say I couldn't live without them. And I lie.
Life sucks here, to be cruelly honest. Oh, the flashy lights, countless casinos, pulsing clubs, and legal hookers. It's all so overrated. My "friends" are idiots. I have real friends all over the country. They're the reason I make it through the day. They're why I'm still alive and breathing in this hellhole. Lucky me.
We'll call them the true friends. I love them, I really do. One in particular brightens my day. One in particular makes it easier to keep on living. One in particular gives me hope and makes me laugh. One in particular makes me feel alive, truly alive, and more alive that I've ever been. His name: Brendon.
Sure, he's a little over a year younger than me. Sure, he's hyper and annoying most of the time. Sure, he's not as intelligent as I'd like. Sure, he whines constantly and craves attention like a junkie craves their fix. But he's my best friend and I wouldn't trade him for the world.
I've known Brendon for about seven months now. (The happiest seven months of my life.) We're really close and I've managed to tell him every aspect of my life, save the secret. He knows more about me than my "best friend" Spencer. He knows more about me than my mother did.
Conversing every single day possible and for as long as possible, I feel so safe and untouchable with him. He's quite literally my life now.
This amazing kid, he lives just hours away. We always talk about meeting up but it's seemingly impossible. His parents are awfully strict Mormons and would rather sacrifice Brendon than to let us meet up. My parents... my mother's dead. Whatever. My dad's abusive as hell and I do not want to drag Bren into that, no matter how bad I need to meet him.
We're closer than most people normally are; comfortable with saying we love each other as friends, of course, and occasionally calling each other baby. Just affection showed differently.
I tend to daydream, a lot. Always about meeting this boy, always about how he'll react, how I'll react, and always, always, about what we'll hopefully do.
But this boy, this unsuspectingly innocent boy, is in for a surprise. I'm going to "check out some colleges options" around where he lives. And I will meet him if I die doing it.
---
I pulled into the motel parking lot quickly; my body tired of being scrunched up for the long hours driving. I had already reserved a room for a week and this was a small, unknown motel so vacancies are sure to be dominating at all times. The lady at the desk, the short and unattractive lady, grunted as she tossed the room key at me, nearly hitting me square in the face. Oh well, no matter.
My few bags got thrown in the corner of the small room and I flopped onto the awaiting bed. Right then, I would have loved to message Brendon and see what he was doing, maybe arrange a meet up, but he didn't know then and I was tired. Sleep pulled me in so rapidly.
---
I signed on to AIM after the nap and saw Brendon was away. "At the mall." That came as a slight shock, but the shock lasted barely a minute. I know what mall he goes to; we've discussed the mall here before. And I know how to get there, a surprise taking form quickly as I ran out.
I gunned into the parking lot and hopped out of my car, locking it and running toward the mall doors. Okay, maybe I was a bit desperate and excited. I stopped running after nearly being run over and when I continued my route, I settled on a slow walk. My feet, to their accord, moved slower than I wanted. Nerves never failed me before and they didn't plan on failing me at that time.
When I finally got into the mall, I approached the section of the mall where I know he'd eventually wander to if not there already. The arcade. I strolled in like I always went there and I walked around, peeking around electronic gaming devices discretely. Hope drained from my being as I neared the last section of this grand arcade that I'd yet to search; still no sign of him. I was giving up and was ready to cry when I saw them. I saw those red-framed glasses I'd known from pictures so well and I squeaked. Not the manliest thing to do but excitement gets to us sometimes.
Sneaking up behind him, I watched as he raced around the animated track, dodging the most insane of obstacles. I held back a laugh as he growled and kicked the pedals after losing the race. I saw my chance when he folded his arms over his small chest and pouted at the screen.
I slide into the empty driver seat next to his and ruffled his hair. "It's okay, Brenny. There's always next time..." And I laughed. I laughed because I'd scared him so bad that he nearly screamed and jumped out of his pants. When he finally realized it was in fact me, his eyes grew wide and he pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. "Ry! It's you! What the fuck?" He pulled away and blinked at me, still clearly excited yet thoroughly confused.
Carefully yet quickly, I thought up a response and delivered it with what I had hoped was a sarcasm-free tone, even though I was being completely sarcastic. "Well, I'm graduating soon and college seems like a good decision, so I figured I'd come to see some colleges. Sorry for the interruption, it won't happen again. I'll be leaving now; a busy man like me has a great load of things to attend to." I nodded and wriggled from his grip, sliding off of the seat and strutting out the door. I knew he'd follow me because he's so stubbornly natured, and I ran out of the mall and into the parking lot, hopping into my car and catching my breath as I waited for his inevitable arrival.
The impatient little bugger jumped in and practically dove over the divider, once again embracing me. Oh, how I needed to tell him the secret.
"No, Ryan! No no no no no! Don't leave me here." He pouted that signature pout and clung to the passenger seat, obviously showing that he'd not leave without a fight. Not like I wanted him to leave, anyway…
The rain started to fall down in torrents and Brendon whimpered softly and cuddled against me. I'm not going to lie, I loved that feeling more than any of the other one's I'd experienced throughout my whole life. "Sh, Bren." I wrapped my arms around him and nuzzled his hair. He giggled softly and I grinned. "I want you to know the real reason why I came all the way out here. It has nothing to do with colleges or just meeting you. Those things don't matter..." And before I got to finish what I was trying to say, he started crying and jumped out of the car into the rain.
After climbing out and catching up to him, I pulled him into a very close and a very tight hug. Hooking my finger under his chin, I looked into the chocolate brown pupils and shook my head. "Let me finish, you idiot. I came here to tell you... that I love you. I'm in love with you. I've never felt like this about anyone so long as I've lived and I need you, Brendon. I really do."
I hadn't meant for all of that to just pour out like it had, but there was no taking it back now. I bit my bottom lip and closed my eyes, waiting for him to freak out. Instead of the screaming, infuriating violent moment I'd expected, I felt lush lips on mine, wet with rain. I opened my eyes as I felt him wrap his arms around me and pull me close. Standing there in the rain, getting soaked beyond comprehension, that's when it finally occurred to me that I'm the luckiest guy on earth.
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This is Ryden because I lack creativity it just is. It's written in first person, from Ryan's point of view. There really are no warnings, other than my awful writing skills. No rating, either, simply because I'm too tired to rate it. I wish it had a title, but I'm terrible with those. The subject isn't meant to be a title but if it works for you, think of it like that. It's kind of fluffy, to be honest. Okay, kind of really fluffy. Obviously I don't own Ryan or Brendon because, well, I wouldn't be here if I did. Finally, I'll dedicate this to Alexis because I love her. :]
Also, if you have any ideas about how I should write the second part or of what I should include, please tell me. All ideas are appreciated.
------
Standing there in the rain, getting soaked beyond comprehension, that's when it finally occurred to me that I'm the luckiest guy on earth...
---
Yeah, I talk to people I don't actually know on the Internet all the time. Shamelessly gaining friends every minute. I make real connections with these people. They're what I really love.
People here, I don't give two shits about them. I say I love them. I say they're my life. I say I couldn't live without them. And I lie.
Life sucks here, to be cruelly honest. Oh, the flashy lights, countless casinos, pulsing clubs, and legal hookers. It's all so overrated. My "friends" are idiots. I have real friends all over the country. They're the reason I make it through the day. They're why I'm still alive and breathing in this hellhole. Lucky me.
We'll call them the true friends. I love them, I really do. One in particular brightens my day. One in particular makes it easier to keep on living. One in particular gives me hope and makes me laugh. One in particular makes me feel alive, truly alive, and more alive that I've ever been. His name: Brendon.
Sure, he's a little over a year younger than me. Sure, he's hyper and annoying most of the time. Sure, he's not as intelligent as I'd like. Sure, he whines constantly and craves attention like a junkie craves their fix. But he's my best friend and I wouldn't trade him for the world.
I've known Brendon for about seven months now. (The happiest seven months of my life.) We're really close and I've managed to tell him every aspect of my life, save the secret. He knows more about me than my "best friend" Spencer. He knows more about me than my mother did.
Conversing every single day possible and for as long as possible, I feel so safe and untouchable with him. He's quite literally my life now.
This amazing kid, he lives just hours away. We always talk about meeting up but it's seemingly impossible. His parents are awfully strict Mormons and would rather sacrifice Brendon than to let us meet up. My parents... my mother's dead. Whatever. My dad's abusive as hell and I do not want to drag Bren into that, no matter how bad I need to meet him.
We're closer than most people normally are; comfortable with saying we love each other as friends, of course, and occasionally calling each other baby. Just affection showed differently.
I tend to daydream, a lot. Always about meeting this boy, always about how he'll react, how I'll react, and always, always, about what we'll hopefully do.
But this boy, this unsuspectingly innocent boy, is in for a surprise. I'm going to "check out some colleges options" around where he lives. And I will meet him if I die doing it.
---
I pulled into the motel parking lot quickly; my body tired of being scrunched up for the long hours driving. I had already reserved a room for a week and this was a small, unknown motel so vacancies are sure to be dominating at all times. The lady at the desk, the short and unattractive lady, grunted as she tossed the room key at me, nearly hitting me square in the face. Oh well, no matter.
My few bags got thrown in the corner of the small room and I flopped onto the awaiting bed. Right then, I would have loved to message Brendon and see what he was doing, maybe arrange a meet up, but he didn't know then and I was tired. Sleep pulled me in so rapidly.
---
I signed on to AIM after the nap and saw Brendon was away. "At the mall." That came as a slight shock, but the shock lasted barely a minute. I know what mall he goes to; we've discussed the mall here before. And I know how to get there, a surprise taking form quickly as I ran out.
I gunned into the parking lot and hopped out of my car, locking it and running toward the mall doors. Okay, maybe I was a bit desperate and excited. I stopped running after nearly being run over and when I continued my route, I settled on a slow walk. My feet, to their accord, moved slower than I wanted. Nerves never failed me before and they didn't plan on failing me at that time.
When I finally got into the mall, I approached the section of the mall where I know he'd eventually wander to if not there already. The arcade. I strolled in like I always went there and I walked around, peeking around electronic gaming devices discretely. Hope drained from my being as I neared the last section of this grand arcade that I'd yet to search; still no sign of him. I was giving up and was ready to cry when I saw them. I saw those red-framed glasses I'd known from pictures so well and I squeaked. Not the manliest thing to do but excitement gets to us sometimes.
Sneaking up behind him, I watched as he raced around the animated track, dodging the most insane of obstacles. I held back a laugh as he growled and kicked the pedals after losing the race. I saw my chance when he folded his arms over his small chest and pouted at the screen.
I slide into the empty driver seat next to his and ruffled his hair. "It's okay, Brenny. There's always next time..." And I laughed. I laughed because I'd scared him so bad that he nearly screamed and jumped out of his pants. When he finally realized it was in fact me, his eyes grew wide and he pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. "Ry! It's you! What the fuck?" He pulled away and blinked at me, still clearly excited yet thoroughly confused.
Carefully yet quickly, I thought up a response and delivered it with what I had hoped was a sarcasm-free tone, even though I was being completely sarcastic. "Well, I'm graduating soon and college seems like a good decision, so I figured I'd come to see some colleges. Sorry for the interruption, it won't happen again. I'll be leaving now; a busy man like me has a great load of things to attend to." I nodded and wriggled from his grip, sliding off of the seat and strutting out the door. I knew he'd follow me because he's so stubbornly natured, and I ran out of the mall and into the parking lot, hopping into my car and catching my breath as I waited for his inevitable arrival.
The impatient little bugger jumped in and practically dove over the divider, once again embracing me. Oh, how I needed to tell him the secret.
"No, Ryan! No no no no no! Don't leave me here." He pouted that signature pout and clung to the passenger seat, obviously showing that he'd not leave without a fight. Not like I wanted him to leave, anyway…
The rain started to fall down in torrents and Brendon whimpered softly and cuddled against me. I'm not going to lie, I loved that feeling more than any of the other one's I'd experienced throughout my whole life. "Sh, Bren." I wrapped my arms around him and nuzzled his hair. He giggled softly and I grinned. "I want you to know the real reason why I came all the way out here. It has nothing to do with colleges or just meeting you. Those things don't matter..." And before I got to finish what I was trying to say, he started crying and jumped out of the car into the rain.
After climbing out and catching up to him, I pulled him into a very close and a very tight hug. Hooking my finger under his chin, I looked into the chocolate brown pupils and shook my head. "Let me finish, you idiot. I came here to tell you... that I love you. I'm in love with you. I've never felt like this about anyone so long as I've lived and I need you, Brendon. I really do."
I hadn't meant for all of that to just pour out like it had, but there was no taking it back now. I bit my bottom lip and closed my eyes, waiting for him to freak out. Instead of the screaming, infuriating violent moment I'd expected, I felt lush lips on mine, wet with rain. I opened my eyes as I felt him wrap his arms around me and pull me close. Standing there in the rain, getting soaked beyond comprehension, that's when it finally occurred to me that I'm the luckiest guy on earth.
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