tired

[odamadude]

it has finally happened, i have begun my slow down fall into insanity

the over whelming normality of it all is slowly strangling the life out of me untill i slip into the deep coma of tedium.

i am so tired, so very tired, everything i do seems like a struggle just to keep my head above water. it hurts, it actualy physicaly hurts to feel this alone, this rejected.

i have sunken so low that i crossed a line into a very dangerous place last night, my past.

there she was standing in front of my car in the parking lot at ameristop, i just wanted to walk past her and ignore this sighting but i couldn't, in the state i was in i was to lonely and numb to the world to not stop

we talk, for what seemed like days we talk, about the past, the very thing i wanted nothing to do with in this world wasx my own past, especialy not the chunk she had anything to do with.

for those few moments i felt whole again, now that i look back i can't help but to want her back, even though i know it would only cause pain at this point i would take the pain, at least with the pain i can confirm that i can still feel something.

i am so tired

insaneoman out