lost soul 6
Wanting... when we were kind the wanting was killing us, we were so excited about Christmas, birthdays, so excited about the first day, first kiss, first sex, first day at work, school, first day of freedom without parents. But without parents you there are no borders, you are the one who builds them, you are the one who says this is bad and this is good. You need to take the responsibility you need to create your own kingdom full of responsibilities like money, cooking and full of freedom like you can go to sleep whenever you want and watch whatever you want.
People say you become seriously addicted after 3 months of using drugs but I have to say, I know people who take drugs for ages and they are still not addicted but me ..... I fell in love with cocaine pretty fast.
It was the love for the first sign. I gave her my soul she gave me my freedom, my happiness in the shitty world. we were partners in crime, me and her, me and him. Call it whatever you want, I decide to call her "She" because she is so dangerous like women are.
The other story but very similar is Jimmy. Jimmy was someone who wasn't the best person to fall in love. He used his victims to have a little fan with them and then he kicked them off, but sure I didn't know it back than.
Of course it was also my mistake that I let him use me but I'm kind of happy I didn't end up like him.
From times to times I felt like a sexual machine for Charlotte and Jimmy. I always thought Charlotte is a good shy little bit crazy person. But I was sure that having a child in 16 and take drugs wasn't the right thing for a shy girl. Charlotte became more and more like her brother. I wasn't and I'm not the strongest person in this planet and it is easy to use junkie. When I took my meds I could do anything. Sex wasn't a joy when it was the sex with someone who you don't want to fuck. I can't say it wasn't a pleasure, sometimes it was, for example screwing big bro Jimmy on the back seat of the car. When he was moaning like a dog. That was amazing, I felt good, like a king. Like it was me who has a power over him.
Stupid little Jimmy and how he ended up. That's a funny story.
But I don't want to be an evil person.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
it's short and bad but you can't write something good when it''s 9 am :D.
so I still have no idea where I'm going with this story but you will see
I'm leaving tomorrow to see my beautiful, brilliant friend Plasticine so ADIOS
have a good week, weekend and remember me
People say you become seriously addicted after 3 months of using drugs but I have to say, I know people who take drugs for ages and they are still not addicted but me ..... I fell in love with cocaine pretty fast.
It was the love for the first sign. I gave her my soul she gave me my freedom, my happiness in the shitty world. we were partners in crime, me and her, me and him. Call it whatever you want, I decide to call her "She" because she is so dangerous like women are.
The other story but very similar is Jimmy. Jimmy was someone who wasn't the best person to fall in love. He used his victims to have a little fan with them and then he kicked them off, but sure I didn't know it back than.
Of course it was also my mistake that I let him use me but I'm kind of happy I didn't end up like him.
From times to times I felt like a sexual machine for Charlotte and Jimmy. I always thought Charlotte is a good shy little bit crazy person. But I was sure that having a child in 16 and take drugs wasn't the right thing for a shy girl. Charlotte became more and more like her brother. I wasn't and I'm not the strongest person in this planet and it is easy to use junkie. When I took my meds I could do anything. Sex wasn't a joy when it was the sex with someone who you don't want to fuck. I can't say it wasn't a pleasure, sometimes it was, for example screwing big bro Jimmy on the back seat of the car. When he was moaning like a dog. That was amazing, I felt good, like a king. Like it was me who has a power over him.
Stupid little Jimmy and how he ended up. That's a funny story.
But I don't want to be an evil person.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
it's short and bad but you can't write something good when it''s 9 am :D.
so I still have no idea where I'm going with this story but you will see
I'm leaving tomorrow to see my beautiful, brilliant friend Plasticine so ADIOS
have a good week, weekend and remember me