What we can do is this - when we talk on Facebook chat or whatever the fuck, just use the appropriate image from the following photos to pretend I have a very slowly refreshing webcam. These apply for approximately 96% of scenarios.
How very interesting!
That sure was funny!
I dunno, I'm rather skeptical of that!
That sure makes me angry!
How surprising is that thing you just told me!
Awright I'm fuckin' tired and I'ma pass out.