(no subject)
Well my grandpa Silvio died, apparently.
I say 'apparently' because, well, here: http://www.tennessean.com/article/20081216/MTCN0204/81216057/1301
My mother's side of the family is Italian
therein: volatile, dramatic, and prone to be dramatic even harder
Silvio was ostracized from his family when he left my grandmother to marry another woman.
Over a period of I don't care to know how long they had a son.
When I was about 4 or 5 my mother, who although Italian is still a human, sought him out
and found him in Tennessee. He had his own pizza place and did some sort of work at a hotel.
Anyway.. my grandmother, I remember, upon finding out we had been in touch with him, blew her lid
my sister katie slipped the info in my grandma's kitchen
I can't believe I still remember the freak-out
it was that bad
spilled juicy-juice. I remember that for sure.
Italians.
Anyway.. we became close.. visited fairly often
and, when my mom decided to leave my dad, Silvio's home in Tennessee became our home.
I didn't have too hard a time there because I was too young to grasp what was happening.
One morning Katie and I finally asked.. "when are we going home.. when are we going to see dad"
it was awkward.. Silvio made ME understand as well I could
and sort of became the father I would have for quite a while
Until recently I thought of him as my father-figure
well being the volatile sonsabitches they are
the italians that made me
made more useless drama to bring to the grave
4 or 5 years ago a useless tiff over visits (number of, duration, location)
resulted in my mother and step-father's .. what do you call it, banishment?
he didn't want to talk to them
I was young then
and always felt weird.. afraid.. just too lazy? to contact him
It was an argument between adults.. I wasn't the one loading up my car to go on these trips.. I was young enough that the phone calls between family on holidays went between the adults..
I just waited for it to pass.
He knew about Coen when I had him.. through my sister
but I put it off, I guess
I'm sure he never contacted me because he was waiting for me to do it first
they're that childish.
my Dad still does that.
Right after I wrote that I realized I'm just as guilty.
Well my uncle run's for some office (councilman or whatever) in New York City.
Being in that position his office keeps track of any mention of him on the internet and what-not.
That system brought to his attention that news article I put up there.
Silvio's wife Alicia, whom I loved dearly (I've never seen a woman that committed to cigarettes, iced tea, and nutter butters), was surely the person giving this information
they left every single one of us out. His first wife.. their children.. THEIR children?
He was 80. no idea how he died, those things never say.
His funeral is tomorrow and there's no way I can go.
Besides that I'm 'apparently' not welcome to in the first place.
Was this STILL where our relationship was in HIS mind?
I'll never have a chance now. It's like a corny movie.
My mom is near-angelic about this like she is about everything, but I can't imagine what she must really be thinking.
I say 'apparently' because, well, here: http://www.tennessean.com/article/20081216/MTCN0204/81216057/1301
My mother's side of the family is Italian
therein: volatile, dramatic, and prone to be dramatic even harder
Silvio was ostracized from his family when he left my grandmother to marry another woman.
Over a period of I don't care to know how long they had a son.
When I was about 4 or 5 my mother, who although Italian is still a human, sought him out
and found him in Tennessee. He had his own pizza place and did some sort of work at a hotel.
Anyway.. my grandmother, I remember, upon finding out we had been in touch with him, blew her lid
my sister katie slipped the info in my grandma's kitchen
I can't believe I still remember the freak-out
it was that bad
spilled juicy-juice. I remember that for sure.
Italians.
Anyway.. we became close.. visited fairly often
and, when my mom decided to leave my dad, Silvio's home in Tennessee became our home.
I didn't have too hard a time there because I was too young to grasp what was happening.
One morning Katie and I finally asked.. "when are we going home.. when are we going to see dad"
it was awkward.. Silvio made ME understand as well I could
and sort of became the father I would have for quite a while
Until recently I thought of him as my father-figure
well being the volatile sonsabitches they are
the italians that made me
made more useless drama to bring to the grave
4 or 5 years ago a useless tiff over visits (number of, duration, location)
resulted in my mother and step-father's .. what do you call it, banishment?
he didn't want to talk to them
I was young then
and always felt weird.. afraid.. just too lazy? to contact him
It was an argument between adults.. I wasn't the one loading up my car to go on these trips.. I was young enough that the phone calls between family on holidays went between the adults..
I just waited for it to pass.
He knew about Coen when I had him.. through my sister
but I put it off, I guess
I'm sure he never contacted me because he was waiting for me to do it first
they're that childish.
my Dad still does that.
Right after I wrote that I realized I'm just as guilty.
Well my uncle run's for some office (councilman or whatever) in New York City.
Being in that position his office keeps track of any mention of him on the internet and what-not.
That system brought to his attention that news article I put up there.
Silvio's wife Alicia, whom I loved dearly (I've never seen a woman that committed to cigarettes, iced tea, and nutter butters), was surely the person giving this information
they left every single one of us out. His first wife.. their children.. THEIR children?
He was 80. no idea how he died, those things never say.
His funeral is tomorrow and there's no way I can go.
Besides that I'm 'apparently' not welcome to in the first place.
Was this STILL where our relationship was in HIS mind?
I'll never have a chance now. It's like a corny movie.
My mom is near-angelic about this like she is about everything, but I can't imagine what she must really be thinking.