Holy! Holy!

Apr 23, 2009 20:56

i climb the stairs and imagine there's no one up there. the stairs lead to my bedroom, my bed leads to fascinating vivid dreams. voices floating around, lulling me to deeper recesses in my imagination. i climb deep into a quiet space in my mind and regurgitate feelings full of bliss and beauty. as i purge into my hands i grab soft, warm, minced food eaten today in a rush. food full or thought and exploration, stomach acid smelling sour like experimentalism to the high-browed. i take another step forwards, up, and excel to my room. the ceiling fan cuts the voices i hear in half, distorted fiends that will not leave, a cemetery for the hopeless.
reaching the top of the stairs looking to my right there is no one there, only faint premonitions of dreams i've had. walking to my bed's edge my heart grabs my lungs and pulls hard to keep them alive for one more night. my body is trying so hard to keep me here while all the while i input nothing nutritious into it's systems; no teachings, no light.
laying in bed watching the fan spin and spin, then spin some more, wondering how i'll waste so many more of my small days here on plant earth.
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