Feb 08, 2006 15:52
Resisted temptation again! Down with pita chips!
Today I've had a big bag of steamed veggies with that no cal "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" spray, one bowl of soup and 1 20oz bottle of Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper. I know that you aren't supposed to have carbonated beverages on the SHD but I'm more looking at calories than the official diet. I am so damn tired of dieting. I wish this fat would just fall off already, you know? I wonder how much liposuction would cost. :(
I've been getting so depressed lately. I know that it has to do with me basically restricting again... but heck. I dunno. Plus this past week it has felt like my bf is pulling away a little. He has been opting to work late (we're talking like 2am in the morning) which would almost sound suspicious if I didn't know him and his job so well, and he has been wanting to go hang out with his guy friends without me. We tend to be a pea pod, as in we come as a packaged deal, so him wanting to just hang with the guys makes me a little nervous. I know that I am worried for nothing... but I have always thought of him as the more steadfast one and me as the wishy-washier one, the one with all the dreams that don't include him. Maybe he is doing this like a "pregnancy scare." You know- a ploy to get me to hold on to him tighter. Plus - I worry because as far as sex goes we are complete opposites. I can go for just about forever without any (including masturbation) and I don't think he would be completely satisfied even if we did it three times a day. I'm sure he is getting totally sick of having to be the one to initiate everything and having me ask if he is going to make it quick. I dunno what to do though. My libido is way low, I know that, but what am I supposed to do about it? Grrr. I think I need help.