Chapter 9 - Delving beneath his diamond heart
Shrill weeping pierced his hazed vision, the soft choked sobs sending shivers of terror to trail down his spine, making itself known to him amidst the callous jeers and menacing shouts of the milling horde of villagers that surrounded him. He lifted his head blearily from his curled foetal position upon the muddy ground, to rest his horrified eyes on a terrifying scene that burned a searing imprint unto his memories.
***
She clasped the still, white body to her breast, palming pale cheeks lovingly as she rocked back and forth, unfeeling of the icy chill of the dirty muddied water seeping an ugly stain through her flimsy night dress. Her eyes stared down affectionately at the drawn visage of her dead daughter, tears of grief streaming down her lined face, a silvery track that glinted in the moonlight. The woman’s withered hands threaded tenderly through a curtain of inky black, pushing away stray wisps of her long, long hair back from her face.
***
Pain clouded his vision, a reddened haze of pure anguish overwhelming his senses. Tiny pinpricks of blinding pain coursed through his consciousness frequently as each rock pelted into his body, creating little cuts upon his snowy skin, painting slashes of crimson scarlet that streaked his filthy body upon the ground. He breathed shallowly, raising his arms ineffectually to shield against the hail of hateful yells and gobs of spit that they threw down at him in revulsion. He lay in a muddy puddle, the biting chill of winter’s cold stinging one side of his face, its dirty fingers smearing grimy smudges on his face.
Ugly smiles of grim satisfaction stretched across their hooded faces as they stoned him to death.
***
The constant backdrop of cacophonous noise soon receded from his senses, leaving him to suffer only in the gleeful companionship of sheer white, hot pain that ripped viciously through the very fabric of his soul. The villagers had left him for dead, none daring enough to move closer to check the barely perceptible wheeze of his straining lungs as it strove to keep him alive. He wallowed in his misery, putrid hate filling the very core of his throbbing heart that pumped bitter wretchedness through his veins, permeating every pore with his own detest.
A monster lay upon the ground.
***
He was shaken roughly awake by strong fingers that gripped his shoulders painfully. Yunho awoke with a gasp, trickles of cold sweat beading little drops upon his forehead as he struggled with the smothering sheets. His frantic gaze sought the familiar comfort of inky rosette plum, swirling scintillatingly in burgundy pools of wine, as Jaejoong stared back at him in earnest. His eyes bore down into the very core of Yunho's soul, tightened in worry and distress, deepening the fine lines that were etched unto a bruised purplish expanse beneath them.
“Are you okay?” Jaejoong murmured in concern, searching uneasily within his glazed tawny orbs for any hint of full consciousness. Yunho nodded mutely, a slight hesitant dip of his head that released a sigh of weary relief past Jaejoong's reddened full lips.
“I’m fine. It’s just a nightmare.” Yunho said in a low voice, his words carrying clear in the hushed confines of Jaejoong's bedroom. His words were uttered flippantly, plainly dismissing his plaguing nightmares, whilst he struggled internally with his demons. Jaejoong nodded hesitantly, plainly not believing his assurance but choosing instead to ignore the man’s already wounded pride.
Yunho sat up gingerly, resting his head upon the wrought iron headboard, watching silently as Jaejoong moved away to lift slim fingers and part a slit through the curtains. He peered through the gap, the sun’s last dying rays washing his pale skin with her honeyed warmth, streaks of molten gold painting his high cheekbones that created a fascinating canvas of flames that licked across his face.
“The sun’s set. It’ll be full moon in a few hours,” Jaejoong commented to no one in particular, turning to face Yunho as he let the curtains swish back into place. “It’s time.” He stated offhandedly, before briskly throwing a few items into a large black bag that lay slumped in a corner of the room. Various cardboard industrial boxes, scribbled over the sides with words in red, accompanied with black tape strapping the seams together, were heaped in a jumble next to the bag.
Yunho peered over the edge of the bed to observe Jaejoong crouched upon the floor inspecting the contents, as he took in the casual clothes that adorned Jaejoong's slim figure. A loose shirt of white cotton hung upon his thin shoulders, a curious pattern of black ink peeking through the collar, an intricate scrawl of midnight lace that marred the smooth snowy expanse between his shoulder blades.
He was dressed casually; tight dark blue jeans hugging his lean legs complete with worn out sneakers, their shoelaces blackened at the ends with the grime and dirt of the city’s streets. They were faded and old, the rubber insoles worn down to tattered pieces, the once white shoes now frayed forlornly at the seams.
Curiosity perked through his senses, an unruly mischievous imp that danced within the pit of his belly, blurting out his question past his parted lips before Yunho could even stop it. “What are you doing?” Jaejoong slowed down his frantic packing, before sitting back on his haunches, huffing out a tired sigh as he tangled his fingers in his coppery hair.
“I’m just doing some last minute adjustments,” Jaejoong murmured distractedly, nibbling on his bottom lip as he cast a preoccupied eye over the bundle of items, strewn haphazardly in a messy heap. “It’s my day off every month. Since you’re sorta my servant now, it’s your duty to help me carry all this.” He threw a cheerful smile over his shoulder at Yunho's startled gaze, throwing his arms wide, gesturing grandly at the pile of various packages, foodstuffs and random pots and pans.
“All this? By hand!?” Yunho said incredulously, his widened orbs assessing the immensity of the huge task that lay before him. Jaejoong nodded absently mindedly, humming a tuneless song that floated through his mind.
He abruptly shifted his body around, fluttering his hands about as he shot an apologetic glance Yunho's way. “No, no, no. Not by hand, we’re taking Yoochun's car...” He clarified himself, straightening up gracefully as he began stacking the boxes atop each other in a neat load. “Those clothes on the chair are for you. Dress quickly and meet me outside. They’ll be waiting for me very soon.” Jaejoong added quickly, swiftly moving out of the room to trundle along the hallway with his mountain of cardboard boxes.
Yunho sat upon the bed, shaking his head in bafflement as he sifted through the neatly folded clothes that lay draped over the back of a chair. A perplexed frown marred his smooth forehead, his ochre irises narrowing in confusion as he slipped on a pair of loose fitting jeans and a thick black furry jacket over his white t-shirt. Adjusting a plain cap over his tousled hair, Yunho smoothed out a few stray wisps that stuck out stubbornly from the confines of his cap and took a last fleeting glance at his presentable reflection in the mirror, before closing the heavy wooden firmly behind him.
***
“They’re all packed inside. I assume you know how to drive,” Jaejoong quirked an arched brow at Yunho questioningly, his lips curved upwards in a gentle smile. A matching heavy black jacket was wrapped around his skinny frame, the fur lined hood pulled up to shield his face away from the clawing fingers of the frosty wind. Jaejoong leaned nonchalantly on a side door, blowing out a puff of acrid smoke into the icy wind, as he watched the hazy cloud tatter apart under the brunt of wintry fingers.
He smiled genially at various clients that frequented Kit's club, as they passed blithely assessing eyes upon his lithe frame, their playful smirks widening as they scoured his narrow nose and refined features. Their avaricious eyes glinted in pleasure as they savoured the milky radiance that the full moon showered upon his smooth skin, a silky expanse of ivory that mirrored the snowy landscape that blanketed the city.
Yunho rolled his eyes at their materialistic shallowness, irritation burning a searing ember of annoyance as he narrowed his eyes in anger at the women. He shifted his body slightly, shielding Jaejoong away from their revolting perusal of the statuesque beauty that slouched in front of him.
They look at him as if he’s something to eat... Yunho's lips twisted downwards in disgust.
Not trusting himself to speak, Yunho simply nodded and slid smoothly into the front seat, gripping the leather wheel with tightened fingers. Jaejoong's smile faltered, while he stared at the rigid frame of the tall man in the driver’s seat, his lips drooping downwards as he blew out a resigned sigh. “So much for being friendly...” Jaejoong muttered under his breath before he closed the car door with a resolute click, strapping the seat belt across his body as Yunho sped off into the darkening night.
“Where are we going?” Yunho finally broke the silence, whilst the car slowed to a stop in front of a red light. Jaejoong startled out of his reverie, turning to fixate his unblinking gaze upon Yunho's calm features, as he tore his unfocused stare away from the view beyond the tinted windows.
“You should see an alley coming up, next to a street sign that says ‘Seocho-dong’,” Jaejoong murmured quietly, pointing ahead to a lone street sign standing beneath a single flickering streetlight, its edges bent and rusted, as it tilted slightly forlornly to the side with its white letters faded and old. Yunho turned into the darkened alley, the sleek black finish of the car, complete with its tinted windows, blending in with the cover of roiling shadows. The purring engine abruptly died, leaving a hushed silence to pervade their senses.
Jaejoong opened the side door, revelling in the cool wash of the night’s air blowing gently across his skin, breathing in deeply of the crisp bitter chill of winter’s frost. Dirty snow crunched delightfully as Jaejoong walked lightly upon it, constant treads by thick snow boots packing it into a hard unyielding surface that glistened treacherously underfoot. He leaned into the backseat, half of his body vanishing within the darkened confines of the car as Jaejoong picked various parcels in seemingly random order, the scribbled inscriptions giving Yunho no clue as to how the man organised his things.
A heavy load was abruptly thrown into his arms, the leaden weight dragging down at his tensed muscles, as Yunho puffed out a startled gasp. He staggered backwards slightly, balancing the stack of boxes precariously within his outstretched arms, as he fought against the slickened snowy surface. Jaejoong chuckled lightly, shooting an apologetic glance Yunho's way before he shuffled down a down trodden alleyway, only throwing a faint call over his shoulder for Yunho to follow him as he continued walking away.
His eyes sharpened and narrowed, picking out the slightest movements as he stepped lightly upon the cobbled ground, random dips and chinks in the snow providing a perilous journey in the dead of winter. With their heightened senses, they were able to step sure-footedly over the hazardous pathway, Jaejoong smiling in satisfaction as he watched Yunho jump nimbly over a wet puddle of icy slush.
The side alleyway soon opened up into a maze of rickety houses, rows upon rows of ramshackle single storey concrete buildings, each varying in their own state of disrepair. Yunho sighed out wearily as he took in the nameless houses, their blank white surfaces stained with the grime and dirt of the city, as various sounds pierced through the still night. One side of the street’s houses were vandalised with a large graffiti mural that spelled out crude words, the garish colours standing out starkly against the relative alabaster paint of the concrete walls. He met Jaejoong's amused orbs in incredulity, wondering at the unfathomable plans that lurked within the man’s confusing mind.
“What are we doing here?” Yunho nudged his head jerkily in the direction of the winding streets that stretched out before them, doubt colouring his words as he shot sceptical glances at Jaejoong whilst turning back periodically to look upon the unkempt neighbourhood.
“This,” Jaejoong stated while he started down a dark street, weak watery rays cast by infrequently placed streetlights lighting their way ineffectually. “used to be my home. Not really considered choice living quarters, what with the absence of in-built heaters, frequent electricity failures and lack of hot water. But still, it was my home, and I lived in this neighbourhood for 16 years before Kit plucked me out from the cycle of poverty. Even after my parents died and my sister sold herself into prostitution, I continued staying here, juggling 5 jobs everyday just to scrape by in my pitiable life.” He stated unemotionally, the deadened monosyllables rolling from his lips as he stared straight ahead.
Yunho froze mid-step, halting amidst a light hail of snow that spiralled around them in haunting dances of ethereal beauty. “Im... I’m so sorr- ” He stuttered incoherently before being cut off abruptly.
“Stop. Before you say anymore,” Jaejoong turned around suddenly, a soft smile painting his lips whilst his eyes tightened slightly in pain. His eyes swirled hypnotically, riveting Yunho to the spot as he stared through a veil of drifting snow with unfathomable vermillion irises. “I don’t need your pity and neither do you need mine. So we’re on even footing here. Don’t tilt the balance.” Yunho remained silent, as Jaejoong's word sunk in. Yunho took in a full breath and nodded firmly, a slight quirk of his lips as they mirrored each other, standing out in the snow, grinning in a feverish haze of maddened understanding. Jaejoong replied with a curt nod before tucking his hands into his hoodies pockets and continuing his solemn stride.
***
Jaejoong stopped abruptly at a wooden door, the paint faded and peeling, as he knocked slightly on the rickety frame. There was no answer for a time, before the door creaked open hesitantly, a weathered face lined deeply with ancient wrinkles peering blearily up at him. She squinted her eyes in an effort to see clearly, resting her clouded irises upon his tender countenance that stared back at her in earnest.
“Halmeonim.” Jaejoong smiled gently, bowing slightly as she finally recognised him, her tightly pursed lips splitting into a wide smile. She clasped his hands familiarly, pulling him in for a hug as Jaejoong enfolded his long arms around the frail woman, engulfing her tiny body in his warm embrace. She laughed loudly, like a delighted child as she leaned back to palm his cheeks lovingly with her withered hands. Yunho turned away immediately, flashes of his hideous memories rising unbidden from the depths of his tarred soul to slice through his consciousness.
Withered hands. Pale cheeks. The ugly smear of crimson scarlet as the weathered fingers smoothed across her face. No. No. No!
A rush of vertigo dizzied Yunho momentarily, as he shook his head violently to clear his tumultuous thoughts of his agonising memories. A pounding pain settled at the back of his head, a mounting torturous pressure behind his eyeballs causing him to squeeze his eyes tightly shut. “What’s wrong?” Jaejoong murmured urgently, worry creasing his brows together in an anxious frown. Yunho's eyes flickered open, as he stared disconcertedly at the blurred vision of Jaejoong staring back at him in distress.
“No, no, no. I’m fine,” Yunho shook his head jerkily. “just a headache...” He trailed off, trying in vain to assuage the blossom of troubled concern that swirled within Jaejoong's pits of darkened wine. Jaejoong nodded half-heartedly, startling Yunho by slipping a mitten palm to squeeze his lax fingers before hurriedly turning away to flash a dazzling smile at the elderly woman. He placed one of the cardboard boxes before her, seated patiently on the cold floor as she slowly pried the cover open with her hands, curled stiff from the cold.
She cried out in wonder, lifting out thick woollen blankets, intricate designs painstakingly stitched onto the sides and various health supplements that sat in a heap in one corner of the large box. She clasped Jaejoong's face, placing a dainty peck upon his forehead, her eyes crinkled in motherly affection as she thanked him softly for the gifts. Yunho watched in wonder as Jaejoong's lids slid shut in bliss, a gentle smile curving his lips upwards, the icy planes of his angular face softening into an almost childlike countenance as his breathtaking beauty unfurled beneath her fond pats atop his head and doting caresses.
He felt strangely privileged, a curious marvel of honour bestowed upon him as he was allowed a rare glimpse into a slice of Jaejoong's past, unveiling not only his childhood but the very core of his heart that was bared to Yunho in all its resplendent fragility. Yunho released a pent up breath that he had not realised he was holding in, while the astounding revelation dawned within his orbs of lightened champagne.
Beneath his cold facade of charming smiles and wicked glints that harboured the scandalising promise of heated passionate nights spent under pristine sheets, Jaejoong's true nature unravelled before Yunho's eyes. His devastating, porcelain beauty belied a shy and gentle man that responded to the slightest showers of love and care, his carefully wrought smirks fading into full lips that pouted petulantly in response to the teasing taunts from an elderly woman, whilst his eyes warmed with mirth and barely concealed love.
Yunho learned something new about Jaejoong that night.
***
“Why do you keep staring at me like that?” Jaejoong uttered slowly as he gazed at Yunho cautiously. “Its weirding me out, Yunho...” He stated testily, fluttering his slim fingers about as he turned briskly around to walk back to the car. They had finished a dozen or so more houses, dropping in to visit various families, all differing in their state of dishevelled poverty. Yunho was startled time and time again, with the depth of the love and affection that shone forth from their eyes as they welcomed Jaejoong into their cramped homes.
The doors seemed to slide swiftly open, in some instances, even before Jaejoong managed to knock softly as they glimpsed his arrival from between tattered curtains, or sometimes no curtains at all. The full moon heralded his arrival, signalling his monthly visits that filled their dreary lives with a glimmer of happiness and jubilant cheer. Yunho finally uncovered the reason behind the existence of the pots and pans as they were placed lovingly atop a dated stove, its rusted iron top blackened with grime and frozen grease. The children, their cheeks streaked with dirt, smiled toothily back at Jaejoong as they clung stubbornly to his legs. Their family would be able to eat clean food soon.
They loved him and he loved them.
Jaejoong's laughs were carefree and boundless, his eyes crinkled in amusement as he watched the children play in the pristine snow, his hugs compassionate and kind as he engulfed them in his warm embrace. Yunho had stood in the background, smiling genially whenever someone looked his way in curiosity, fidgeting uncomfortably when he heard the tenants whisper in low tones about his presence into Jaejoong's ear. He had glanced beneath the shelter of his cap with narrowed eyes whenever his sensitive ears picked out his name being uttered, watching Jaejoong for any telltale signs of his feelings towards Yunho. Jaejoong constantly surprised him, a delicate smile gracing his lips whenever Yunho was mentioned.
Yunho tilted his head to the side in perplexity, his muddled thoughts chasing each other doggedly in endless circles as he puzzled over the source of Jaejoong's tender smile whenever the subject touched upon him. A few days ago, they were just strangers. A few days ago, Yunho had thrown Jaejoong's help callously back into his face. A few days ago, he had almost died.
What was the reason...
Yunho ignored Jaejoong's comment, lost within his thoughts as he absentmindedly followed Jaejoong's wavering shadow upon the crusted ground.
***
She clasped the still, white body to her breast, palming pale cheeks lovingly as she rocked back and forth, unfeeling of the icy chill of the dirty muddied water seeping an ugly stain through her flimsy night dress. Her eyes stared down affectionately at the drawn visage of her dead daughter, tears of grief streaming down her lined face, a silvery track that glinted in the moonlight. The woman’s withered hands threaded tenderly through a curtain of inky black, pushing away stray wisps of her long, long hair back from her face.
***
Pain clouded his vision, a reddened haze of pure anguish overwhelming his senses. Tiny pinpricks of blinding pain coursed through his consciousness frequently as each rock pelted into his body, creating little cuts upon his snowy skin, painting slashes of crimson scarlet that streaked his filthy body upon the ground. He breathed shallowly, raising his arms ineffectually to shield against the hail of hateful yells and gobs of spit that they threw down at him in revulsion. He lay in a muddy puddle, the biting chill of winter’s cold stinging one side of his face, its dirty fingers smearing grimy smudges on his face.
Ugly smiles of grim satisfaction stretched across their hooded faces as they stoned him to death.
***
The constant backdrop of cacophonous noise soon receded from his senses, leaving him to suffer only in the gleeful companionship of sheer white, hot pain that ripped viciously through the very fabric of his soul. The villagers had left him for dead, none daring enough to move closer to check the barely perceptible wheeze of his straining lungs as it strove to keep him alive. He wallowed in his misery, putrid hate filling the very core of his throbbing heart that pumped bitter wretchedness through his veins, permeating every pore with his own detest.
A monster lay upon the ground.
***
He was shaken roughly awake by strong fingers that gripped his shoulders painfully. Yunho awoke with a gasp, trickles of cold sweat beading little drops upon his forehead as he struggled with the smothering sheets. His frantic gaze sought the familiar comfort of inky rosette plum, swirling scintillatingly in burgundy pools of wine, as Jaejoong stared back at him in earnest. His eyes bore down into the very core of Yunho's soul, tightened in worry and distress, deepening the fine lines that were etched unto a bruised purplish expanse beneath them.
“Are you okay?” Jaejoong murmured in concern, searching uneasily within his glazed tawny orbs for any hint of full consciousness. Yunho nodded mutely, a slight hesitant dip of his head that released a sigh of weary relief past Jaejoong's reddened full lips.
“I’m fine. It’s just a nightmare.” Yunho said in a low voice, his words carrying clear in the hushed confines of Jaejoong's bedroom. His words were uttered flippantly, plainly dismissing his plaguing nightmares, whilst he struggled internally with his demons. Jaejoong nodded hesitantly, plainly not believing his assurance but choosing instead to ignore the man’s already wounded pride.
Yunho sat up gingerly, resting his head upon the wrought iron headboard, watching silently as Jaejoong moved away to lift slim fingers and part a slit through the curtains. He peered through the gap, the sun’s last dying rays washing his pale skin with her honeyed warmth, streaks of molten gold painting his high cheekbones that created a fascinating canvas of flames that licked across his face.
“The sun’s set. It’ll be full moon in a few hours,” Jaejoong commented to no one in particular, turning to face Yunho as he let the curtains swish back into place. “It’s time.” He stated offhandedly, before briskly throwing a few items into a large black bag that lay slumped in a corner of the room. Various cardboard industrial boxes, scribbled over the sides with words in red, accompanied with black tape strapping the seams together, were heaped in a jumble next to the bag.
Yunho peered over the edge of the bed to observe Jaejoong crouched upon the floor inspecting the contents, as he took in the casual clothes that adorned Jaejoong's slim figure. A loose shirt of white cotton hung upon his thin shoulders, a curious pattern of black ink peeking through the collar, an intricate scrawl of midnight lace that marred the smooth snowy expanse between his shoulder blades.
He was dressed casually; tight dark blue jeans hugging his lean legs complete with worn out sneakers, their shoelaces blackened at the ends with the grime and dirt of the city’s streets. They were faded and old, the rubber insoles worn down to tattered pieces, the once white shoes now frayed forlornly at the seams.
Curiosity perked through his senses, an unruly mischievous imp that danced within the pit of his belly, blurting out his question past his parted lips before Yunho could even stop it. “What are you doing?” Jaejoong slowed down his frantic packing, before sitting back on his haunches, huffing out a tired sigh as he tangled his fingers in his coppery hair.
“I’m just doing some last minute adjustments,” Jaejoong murmured distractedly, nibbling on his bottom lip as he cast a preoccupied eye over the bundle of items, strewn haphazardly in a messy heap. “It’s my day off every month. Since you’re sorta my servant now, it’s your duty to help me carry all this.” He threw a cheerful smile over his shoulder at Yunho's startled gaze, throwing his arms wide, gesturing grandly at the pile of various packages, foodstuffs and random pots and pans.
“All this? By hand!?” Yunho said incredulously, his widened orbs assessing the immensity of the huge task that lay before him. Jaejoong nodded absently mindedly, humming a tuneless song that floated through his mind.
He abruptly shifted his body around, fluttering his hands about as he shot an apologetic glance Yunho's way. “No, no, no. Not by hand, we’re taking Yoochun's car...” He clarified himself, straightening up gracefully as he began stacking the boxes atop each other in a neat load. “Those clothes on the chair are for you. Dress quickly and meet me outside. They’ll be waiting for me very soon.” Jaejoong added quickly, swiftly moving out of the room to trundle along the hallway with his mountain of cardboard boxes.
Yunho sat upon the bed, shaking his head in bafflement as he sifted through the neatly folded clothes that lay draped over the back of a chair. A perplexed frown marred his smooth forehead, his ochre irises narrowing in confusion as he slipped on a pair of loose fitting jeans and a thick black furry jacket over his white t-shirt. Adjusting a plain cap over his tousled hair, Yunho smoothed out a few stray wisps that stuck out stubbornly from the confines of his cap and took a last fleeting glance at his presentable reflection in the mirror, before closing the heavy wooden firmly behind him.
***
“They’re all packed inside. I assume you know how to drive,” Jaejoong quirked an arched brow at Yunho questioningly, his lips curved upwards in a gentle smile. A matching heavy black jacket was wrapped around his skinny frame, the fur lined hood pulled up to shield his face away from the clawing fingers of the frosty wind. Jaejoong leaned nonchalantly on a side door, blowing out a puff of acrid smoke into the icy wind, as he watched the hazy cloud tatter apart under the brunt of wintry fingers.
He smiled genially at various clients that frequented Kit's club, as they passed blithely assessing eyes upon his lithe frame, their playful smirks widening as they scoured his narrow nose and refined features. Their avaricious eyes glinted in pleasure as they savoured the milky radiance that the full moon showered upon his smooth skin, a silky expanse of ivory that mirrored the snowy landscape that blanketed the city.
Yunho rolled his eyes at their materialistic shallowness, irritation burning a searing ember of annoyance as he narrowed his eyes in anger at the women. He shifted his body slightly, shielding Jaejoong away from their revolting perusal of the statuesque beauty that slouched in front of him.
They look at him as if he’s something to eat... Yunho's lips twisted downwards in disgust.
Not trusting himself to speak, Yunho simply nodded and slid smoothly into the front seat, gripping the leather wheel with tightened fingers. Jaejoong's smile faltered, while he stared at the rigid frame of the tall man in the driver’s seat, his lips drooping downwards as he blew out a resigned sigh. “So much for being friendly...” Jaejoong muttered under his breath before he closed the car door with a resolute click, strapping the seat belt across his body as Yunho sped off into the darkening night.
“Where are we going?” Yunho finally broke the silence, whilst the car slowed to a stop in front of a red light. Jaejoong startled out of his reverie, turning to fixate his unblinking gaze upon Yunho's calm features, as he tore his unfocused stare away from the view beyond the tinted windows.
“You should see an alley coming up, next to a street sign that says ‘Seocho-dong’,” Jaejoong murmured quietly, pointing ahead to a lone street sign standing beneath a single flickering streetlight, its edges bent and rusted, as it tilted slightly forlornly to the side with its white letters faded and old. Yunho turned into the darkened alley, the sleek black finish of the car, complete with its tinted windows, blending in with the cover of roiling shadows. The purring engine abruptly died, leaving a hushed silence to pervade their senses.
Jaejoong opened the side door, revelling in the cool wash of the night’s air blowing gently across his skin, breathing in deeply of the crisp bitter chill of winter’s frost. Dirty snow crunched delightfully as Jaejoong walked lightly upon it, constant treads by thick snow boots packing it into a hard unyielding surface that glistened treacherously underfoot. He leaned into the backseat, half of his body vanishing within the darkened confines of the car as Jaejoong picked various parcels in seemingly random order, the scribbled inscriptions giving Yunho no clue as to how the man organised his things.
A heavy load was abruptly thrown into his arms, the leaden weight dragging down at his tensed muscles, as Yunho puffed out a startled gasp. He staggered backwards slightly, balancing the stack of boxes precariously within his outstretched arms, as he fought against the slickened snowy surface. Jaejoong chuckled lightly, shooting an apologetic glance Yunho's way before he shuffled down a down trodden alleyway, only throwing a faint call over his shoulder for Yunho to follow him as he continued walking away.
His eyes sharpened and narrowed, picking out the slightest movements as he stepped lightly upon the cobbled ground, random dips and chinks in the snow providing a perilous journey in the dead of winter. With their heightened senses, they were able to step sure-footedly over the hazardous pathway, Jaejoong smiling in satisfaction as he watched Yunho jump nimbly over a wet puddle of icy slush.
The side alleyway soon opened up into a maze of rickety houses, rows upon rows of ramshackle single storey concrete buildings, each varying in their own state of disrepair. Yunho sighed out wearily as he took in the nameless houses, their blank white surfaces stained with the grime and dirt of the city, as various sounds pierced through the still night. One side of the street’s houses were vandalised with a large graffiti mural that spelled out crude words, the garish colours standing out starkly against the relative alabaster paint of the concrete walls. He met Jaejoong's amused orbs in incredulity, wondering at the unfathomable plans that lurked within the man’s confusing mind.
“What are we doing here?” Yunho nudged his head jerkily in the direction of the winding streets that stretched out before them, doubt colouring his words as he shot sceptical glances at Jaejoong whilst turning back periodically to look upon the unkempt neighbourhood.
“This,” Jaejoong stated while he started down a dark street, weak watery rays cast by infrequently placed streetlights lighting their way ineffectually. “used to be my home. Not really considered choice living quarters, what with the absence of in-built heaters, frequent electricity failures and lack of hot water. But still, it was my home, and I lived in this neighbourhood for 16 years before Kit plucked me out from the cycle of poverty. Even after my parents died and my sister sold herself into prostitution, I continued staying here, juggling 5 jobs everyday just to scrape by in my pitiable life.” He stated unemotionally, the deadened monosyllables rolling from his lips as he stared straight ahead.
Yunho froze mid-step, halting amidst a light hail of snow that spiralled around them in haunting dances of ethereal beauty. “Im... I’m so sorr- ” He stuttered incoherently before being cut off abruptly.
“Stop. Before you say anymore,” Jaejoong turned around suddenly, a soft smile painting his lips whilst his eyes tightened slightly in pain. His eyes swirled hypnotically, riveting Yunho to the spot as he stared through a veil of drifting snow with unfathomable vermillion irises. “I don’t need your pity and neither do you need mine. So we’re on even footing here. Don’t tilt the balance.” Yunho remained silent, as Jaejoong's word sunk in. Yunho took in a full breath and nodded firmly, a slight quirk of his lips as they mirrored each other, standing out in the snow, grinning in a feverish haze of maddened understanding. Jaejoong replied with a curt nod before tucking his hands into his hoodies pockets and continuing his solemn stride.
***
Jaejoong stopped abruptly at a wooden door, the paint faded and peeling, as he knocked slightly on the rickety frame. There was no answer for a time, before the door creaked open hesitantly, a weathered face lined deeply with ancient wrinkles peering blearily up at him. She squinted her eyes in an effort to see clearly, resting her clouded irises upon his tender countenance that stared back at her in earnest.
“Halmeonim.” Jaejoong smiled gently, bowing slightly as she finally recognised him, her tightly pursed lips splitting into a wide smile. She clasped his hands familiarly, pulling him in for a hug as Jaejoong enfolded his long arms around the frail woman, engulfing her tiny body in his warm embrace. She laughed loudly, like a delighted child as she leaned back to palm his cheeks lovingly with her withered hands. Yunho turned away immediately, flashes of his hideous memories rising unbidden from the depths of his tarred soul to slice through his consciousness.
Withered hands. Pale cheeks. The ugly smear of crimson scarlet as the weathered fingers smoothed across her face. No. No. No!
A rush of vertigo dizzied Yunho momentarily, as he shook his head violently to clear his tumultuous thoughts of his agonising memories. A pounding pain settled at the back of his head, a mounting torturous pressure behind his eyeballs causing him to squeeze his eyes tightly shut. “What’s wrong?” Jaejoong murmured urgently, worry creasing his brows together in an anxious frown. Yunho's eyes flickered open, as he stared disconcertedly at the blurred vision of Jaejoong staring back at him in distress.
“No, no, no. I’m fine,” Yunho shook his head jerkily. “just a headache...” He trailed off, trying in vain to assuage the blossom of troubled concern that swirled within Jaejoong's pits of darkened wine. Jaejoong nodded half-heartedly, startling Yunho by slipping a mitten palm to squeeze his lax fingers before hurriedly turning away to flash a dazzling smile at the elderly woman. He placed one of the cardboard boxes before her, seated patiently on the cold floor as she slowly pried the cover open with her hands, curled stiff from the cold.
She cried out in wonder, lifting out thick woollen blankets, intricate designs painstakingly stitched onto the sides and various health supplements that sat in a heap in one corner of the large box. She clasped Jaejoong's face, placing a dainty peck upon his forehead, her eyes crinkled in motherly affection as she thanked him softly for the gifts. Yunho watched in wonder as Jaejoong's lids slid shut in bliss, a gentle smile curving his lips upwards, the icy planes of his angular face softening into an almost childlike countenance as his breathtaking beauty unfurled beneath her fond pats atop his head and doting caresses.
He felt strangely privileged, a curious marvel of honour bestowed upon him as he was allowed a rare glimpse into a slice of Jaejoong's past, unveiling not only his childhood but the very core of his heart that was bared to Yunho in all its resplendent fragility. Yunho released a pent up breath that he had not realised he was holding in, while the astounding revelation dawned within his orbs of lightened champagne.
Beneath his cold facade of charming smiles and wicked glints that harboured the scandalising promise of heated passionate nights spent under pristine sheets, Jaejoong's true nature unravelled before Yunho's eyes. His devastating, porcelain beauty belied a shy and gentle man that responded to the slightest showers of love and care, his carefully wrought smirks fading into full lips that pouted petulantly in response to the teasing taunts from an elderly woman, whilst his eyes warmed with mirth and barely concealed love.
Yunho learned something new about Jaejoong that night.
***
“Why do you keep staring at me like that?” Jaejoong uttered slowly as he gazed at Yunho cautiously. “Its weirding me out, Yunho...” He stated testily, fluttering his slim fingers about as he turned briskly around to walk back to the car. They had finished a dozen or so more houses, dropping in to visit various families, all differing in their state of dishevelled poverty. Yunho was startled time and time again, with the depth of the love and affection that shone forth from their eyes as they welcomed Jaejoong into their cramped homes.
The doors seemed to slide swiftly open, in some instances, even before Jaejoong managed to knock softly as they glimpsed his arrival from between tattered curtains, or sometimes no curtains at all. The full moon heralded his arrival, signalling his monthly visits that filled their dreary lives with a glimmer of happiness and jubilant cheer. Yunho finally uncovered the reason behind the existence of the pots and pans as they were placed lovingly atop a dated stove, its rusted iron top blackened with grime and frozen grease. The children, their cheeks streaked with dirt, smiled toothily back at Jaejoong as they clung stubbornly to his legs. Their family would be able to eat clean food soon.
They loved him and he loved them.
Jaejoong's laughs were carefree and boundless, his eyes crinkled in amusement as he watched the children play in the pristine snow, his hugs compassionate and kind as he engulfed them in his warm embrace. Yunho had stood in the background, smiling genially whenever someone looked his way in curiosity, fidgeting uncomfortably when he heard the tenants whisper in low tones about his presence into Jaejoong's ear. He had glanced beneath the shelter of his cap with narrowed eyes whenever his sensitive ears picked out his name being uttered, watching Jaejoong for any telltale signs of his feelings towards Yunho. Jaejoong constantly surprised him, a delicate smile gracing his lips whenever Yunho was mentioned.
Yunho tilted his head to the side in perplexity, his muddled thoughts chasing each other doggedly in endless circles as he puzzled over the source of Jaejoong's tender smile whenever the subject touched upon him. A few days ago, they were just strangers. A few days ago, Yunho had thrown Jaejoong's help callously back into his face. A few days ago, he had almost died.
What was the reason...
Yunho ignored Jaejoong's comment, lost within his thoughts as he absentmindedly followed Jaejoong's wavering shadow upon the crusted ground.