May 12, 2005 10:42
-You may be arrested for vagrancy if you do not have at least one dollar bill on your person.
-You must contact the police before entering the city in an automobile.
-The English language is not to be spoken. (Uh...I wonder what they speak in Illinois...)(state law)
-One may not pee in his neighbor's mouth.
-Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire.
-It is illegal to give a dog whiskey.
-It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe's neck.
-Kites may not be flown within the city limits.
-Spitting is forbidden
-A man with a moustache may not kiss a woman.
-No person may keep a smelly dog. (How do you define "smelly"?)
-A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence. (I wonder how they tell the chickens that...)
-Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited. (Ice skating...in June? What is up with this place?)
P.S. I know you guys are lovin' that fine-ass pic of me and ryan. RYAN YOU SEXY BEAST