(no subject)
I've been trying to stay up.
I've been trying to stay positive.
But with everything that's going on around me...I'm finding it really hard to do.
I think I've lost all faith in people.
I try so hard to connect with people.
To be there for them.
To be their friend.
Everytime I end up getting shit on.
I have flakey friends.
That's it.
Bottom line.
I don't mean to hurt anyones feelings by saying this.
From time to time it would be nice to just get a call from someone.
"Hey. Whats up? Just wanted to make sure you were doing ok."
I used to have things like that.
Of course I fucked all that up nice and good.
Maybe I'm just not supposed to have people in my life.
Maybe I'm just supposed to be a recluse.
Maybe I'm reading into this too much.
But I'm really starting to feel like my attempts are being neglected.
Your friends are supposed to be the ones that are there for you 150% of the time.
I don't have anyone like that.
Not anymore anyway.
& that's probably all my fault.
I've been trying to stay positive.
But with everything that's going on around me...I'm finding it really hard to do.
I think I've lost all faith in people.
I try so hard to connect with people.
To be there for them.
To be their friend.
Everytime I end up getting shit on.
I have flakey friends.
That's it.
Bottom line.
I don't mean to hurt anyones feelings by saying this.
From time to time it would be nice to just get a call from someone.
"Hey. Whats up? Just wanted to make sure you were doing ok."
I used to have things like that.
Of course I fucked all that up nice and good.
Maybe I'm just not supposed to have people in my life.
Maybe I'm just supposed to be a recluse.
Maybe I'm reading into this too much.
But I'm really starting to feel like my attempts are being neglected.
Your friends are supposed to be the ones that are there for you 150% of the time.
I don't have anyone like that.
Not anymore anyway.
& that's probably all my fault.