sleeplessss niggghtttsssssssss
my bf is in hawaii for two weeks and my mac's cd/dvd player is broken.
Today I bought a potato for 30cents, a steak for $3.50, a bag of baby spinach for $2.44 and a ripe tomato. Random neighbours somewhere out in the dark are having an outdoor dinner and playing a bunch of songs. I'm pretending i'm part of their group and quite enjoying it.
the other day I went out to partyparty but things and plans and people got pooped and we ended up back at my old place after a few (still quite eventful) hours. I finally tried out a sleeping pill to help me sleep and every time i closed my eyes, there were lots of objects, patterns, colours. I tried to explain the details of my visions to my friend, who was attempting to do the same, only we both knew we were mumbling so we just pretended each other made sense. We mutually got the gist of it all. I dont recall her going to sleep, I nestled myself on the couch and woke up in the morning when said friend was leaving for work. Meowed at the cat that my exflatmate is cat-sitting. let it out to pee and went home to get changed and go to work, after a little detour to get coffee which turned into a 30minute giggle and story exchange with the cafe guy.
anyhow. last night i could not fall asleep until 4:30 or after. Was getting rather anxious as I'm a bit sick and think I will get better if only i get some sleep, natural preferred.
Today I went into work looking utterly terrible.
On the way home, I meowed at another cat, and a passer-by stared at me for it.
i think one of my flatmates has an asian fetish.It's sort of too early to tell/might just be cooincidence.
I have msn installed on my mac. finally. I've been catching up with lots of old buddies, as well as some cousins that are now working. Most of my highschool attendees are still studying at uni so it's weird to talk to the few that have graduated.
anyhow. so the bf went to hawaii. I saw him friday-Saturday and Sunday-day. He was leaving on Wednesday and, after a rather lacklustre initial goodbye, I decided I shoudl at least tell him I'd miss him. It took e a while to pluck up the nerves. I sent an 'i'll miss you' text on tuesday at 6:15 and started freaking out about it all at 6:30... until 8 when he finally msged me back. I am trying to open up more but i'm so scared. Have yet to muster up the courage to say the L word, though I'd say I'm feeling it.
There is this .. umm. big summer ant that is stuck on my ceiling. I've lived here nearly 3 months and have finally decided it is not moving/dead/totally stuck. Still, sometimes it appears to crawl a tiny bit to the side, or its bum or head grows in size. I think it is just my pupils; my eyelids stretching open a bit more; my head moving on my pillow; imagination etc etc
here is a visual eg :
'oh the ant isnt moving'
wait i think it just grew bigger!
I think I fall asleep better with the lights on and the window open. Oddly enough, I am not being vampirised by mosquitoes. I hope this trend continues throughout summer. My bf meanwhile was covered in bites last week. My blood must REALLY suck in comparison.
aw man. it's only been 3 days since scott left and my brain is missing/thinking of him so much more than usual. I think it's because i know i CANT see him if i wanted to, whereas before, it was always an option of train ride and blabla. Tomorrow I will waste time by sleeping at the beach. It is weird and nice to have weekends all to myself again.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Today I bought a potato for 30cents, a steak for $3.50, a bag of baby spinach for $2.44 and a ripe tomato. Random neighbours somewhere out in the dark are having an outdoor dinner and playing a bunch of songs. I'm pretending i'm part of their group and quite enjoying it.
the other day I went out to partyparty but things and plans and people got pooped and we ended up back at my old place after a few (still quite eventful) hours. I finally tried out a sleeping pill to help me sleep and every time i closed my eyes, there were lots of objects, patterns, colours. I tried to explain the details of my visions to my friend, who was attempting to do the same, only we both knew we were mumbling so we just pretended each other made sense. We mutually got the gist of it all. I dont recall her going to sleep, I nestled myself on the couch and woke up in the morning when said friend was leaving for work. Meowed at the cat that my exflatmate is cat-sitting. let it out to pee and went home to get changed and go to work, after a little detour to get coffee which turned into a 30minute giggle and story exchange with the cafe guy.
anyhow. last night i could not fall asleep until 4:30 or after. Was getting rather anxious as I'm a bit sick and think I will get better if only i get some sleep, natural preferred.
Today I went into work looking utterly terrible.
On the way home, I meowed at another cat, and a passer-by stared at me for it.
i think one of my flatmates has an asian fetish.It's sort of too early to tell/might just be cooincidence.
I have msn installed on my mac. finally. I've been catching up with lots of old buddies, as well as some cousins that are now working. Most of my highschool attendees are still studying at uni so it's weird to talk to the few that have graduated.
anyhow. so the bf went to hawaii. I saw him friday-Saturday and Sunday-day. He was leaving on Wednesday and, after a rather lacklustre initial goodbye, I decided I shoudl at least tell him I'd miss him. It took e a while to pluck up the nerves. I sent an 'i'll miss you' text on tuesday at 6:15 and started freaking out about it all at 6:30... until 8 when he finally msged me back. I am trying to open up more but i'm so scared. Have yet to muster up the courage to say the L word, though I'd say I'm feeling it.
There is this .. umm. big summer ant that is stuck on my ceiling. I've lived here nearly 3 months and have finally decided it is not moving/dead/totally stuck. Still, sometimes it appears to crawl a tiny bit to the side, or its bum or head grows in size. I think it is just my pupils; my eyelids stretching open a bit more; my head moving on my pillow; imagination etc etc
here is a visual eg :
'oh the ant isnt moving'
wait i think it just grew bigger!
I think I fall asleep better with the lights on and the window open. Oddly enough, I am not being vampirised by mosquitoes. I hope this trend continues throughout summer. My bf meanwhile was covered in bites last week. My blood must REALLY suck in comparison.
aw man. it's only been 3 days since scott left and my brain is missing/thinking of him so much more than usual. I think it's because i know i CANT see him if i wanted to, whereas before, it was always an option of train ride and blabla. Tomorrow I will waste time by sleeping at the beach. It is weird and nice to have weekends all to myself again.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ