It's been a long time
So here I am. 29. Wow, it's probably been years since I've posted on here, but I suppose it's the safest place for me to throw out my thoughts.
What do I say?
My life is shit. I feel like a total failure and I don't know what I can do about it. It's one of those times when you feel like you're so far down the hole that it's pointless to even start trying to climb up out of it.
Broken phone. No money/full-time job. No prospects of having full-time employment until August, at the earliest. Roommate that bailed and is out of the country, so we have a week to find a replacement for him. Boyfriend who won't speak to me.
Yeah, things are going GREAT.
1. Broken iPhone 4 screen. Happened the second day I got it. While it was in the case.
2. The second part-time job I was doing fell through and is not coming back online until August. Until then I'm stuck wasting my time filling out endless online job applications (have you noticed that now that they're online, they ask 6 times more information that ever before?!?), only to get passed up for positions that I'm laughably overqualified for because they "found someone with more experience" than me. So frustrating.
3. My roommate Sam left us a note that "something came up. Going to Dubai for a few weeks." Who leaves for Dubai at the drop of a hat? 3 weeks later, we get Facebook messages to each of us telling us he doesn't know when he's going to be back and for us to get a new roommate. We have 10 days till the end of the month.
4. Oh, where to begin. My boyfriend and I fight on a regular basis, and I'm tired of it. Or maybe I'm tired of everything, and my threshold for dealing with the fighting as dropped to new levels. In any event, there was another fight earlier this week, but this time I didn't back down or let it go. I hate passive-aggressiveness. It's so shitty and weak. Passive-aggressive Facebook status updates where EVERYONE knows what you're talking about and you're just flagrantly airing your dirty laundry: puke-worthy. He's done this before to me, and normally I just try to be the bigger person and ignore it, and once I even explicitly asked him NOT to do that. But he did it anyway. I ignored the first one. Then after the second one, I posted my own little jab, but it at least had a positive spin ("If you want to be free, be free" by Cat Stevens). Then a blatently raging, bitchy one from him. So I countered with the same artist and an upped ante of bitchery ("I don't need you to love me"). I'm sure you can guess how well that sat with him. He sent me a long message, and then I called and said my peace. And here we are, with nothing resolved.
My mom half-jokingly suggested I move home. At this point, I'm left wondering what's keeping me here.
What do I say?
My life is shit. I feel like a total failure and I don't know what I can do about it. It's one of those times when you feel like you're so far down the hole that it's pointless to even start trying to climb up out of it.
Broken phone. No money/full-time job. No prospects of having full-time employment until August, at the earliest. Roommate that bailed and is out of the country, so we have a week to find a replacement for him. Boyfriend who won't speak to me.
Yeah, things are going GREAT.
1. Broken iPhone 4 screen. Happened the second day I got it. While it was in the case.
2. The second part-time job I was doing fell through and is not coming back online until August. Until then I'm stuck wasting my time filling out endless online job applications (have you noticed that now that they're online, they ask 6 times more information that ever before?!?), only to get passed up for positions that I'm laughably overqualified for because they "found someone with more experience" than me. So frustrating.
3. My roommate Sam left us a note that "something came up. Going to Dubai for a few weeks." Who leaves for Dubai at the drop of a hat? 3 weeks later, we get Facebook messages to each of us telling us he doesn't know when he's going to be back and for us to get a new roommate. We have 10 days till the end of the month.
4. Oh, where to begin. My boyfriend and I fight on a regular basis, and I'm tired of it. Or maybe I'm tired of everything, and my threshold for dealing with the fighting as dropped to new levels. In any event, there was another fight earlier this week, but this time I didn't back down or let it go. I hate passive-aggressiveness. It's so shitty and weak. Passive-aggressive Facebook status updates where EVERYONE knows what you're talking about and you're just flagrantly airing your dirty laundry: puke-worthy. He's done this before to me, and normally I just try to be the bigger person and ignore it, and once I even explicitly asked him NOT to do that. But he did it anyway. I ignored the first one. Then after the second one, I posted my own little jab, but it at least had a positive spin ("If you want to be free, be free" by Cat Stevens). Then a blatently raging, bitchy one from him. So I countered with the same artist and an upped ante of bitchery ("I don't need you to love me"). I'm sure you can guess how well that sat with him. He sent me a long message, and then I called and said my peace. And here we are, with nothing resolved.
My mom half-jokingly suggested I move home. At this point, I'm left wondering what's keeping me here.