Fucking fuck on a fucktard's ARSE!
Had a visitor tonight. Came with a blue uniform, a hard hat and a badge, and he turned up on our doorstep looking grave and grim.
"Does a Mr. X live here?" he asked (obviously substituting X for our real surname).
1. "Yes," replies my mother warily.
"Are you his wife, ma'am?"
"Yes."
"Does he own an orange Kia Picanto, of the number plate," and he proceeds to reel off my dad's plate.
Now, we live in the suburbs. The only reason police come to the suburbs is if there's been a break-in. If they come round and ask for someone who's not home by name, that usually means that person has been killed. Mention a number plate? Car accident. So, naturally, we're shitting ourselves that something awful's happened to my dad - especially since we've been trying to ring him all evening to ask when he'll be home for the evening meal, and nobody was able to get a reply. You they say your entire life flashes before your eyes right before you die? Well it's worse when you're seeing someone else's the split-second before you're expecting to hear that they've died.
"I'm afraid, ma'am," said the policeman, "there's a high likelihood of that car being stolen."
"Stolen?" repeats my mother. "Oh fuck, is my husband okay? Did someone hurt him when they took it?"
"That's not what I meant, ma'am."
"Excuse me?"
"What I mean to say is, the car is stolen property."
Yup. It appears that a year ago when we bought it, the car wasn't actually the legal property of the showroom we got it from. They'd bought it from a car hire company that went bust, and the company had only leased their cars from Kia. So despite paying over £5000 for the fecking thing, it turns out it's not actually ours, the police are coming to impound it tomorrow, and it's unlikely we're ever going to see a penny of that money again. Since my mother just retired through ill health, there's no way my parents can afford to just lose a car and that amount of money - especially not the car my dad uses every day to get to and from his work fifteen miles away.
To keep them from having to use my sister's university fund, I've offered to bail them out using my savings, despite this putting me in a sticky situation while I'm paying back my student loan. And I'll admit, I'm sitting here shaking a mental fist at the fuckers who caused all this. I've literally been saving that money since I was sixteen and working in a chip shop. I was attacked by drunken punters while working the graveyard shift at that job, but I kept at it because I knew I'd need the money to get myself out of the debt incurred for getting an education. So there go my dreams of being debt-free and working towards laying down a deposit on a place of my own someday. Added to this, my mother had the worst panic attack I've ever seen after the policeman left, and started holding her chest. She has a history of heart problems in her family and she's overweight and on the specific blood pressure tablets that weaken the heart and cause increased risk of angina and sudden cardiac arrest.
So cheers very much, fucktards. I hope you all get some terrible disease that causes you to excrete out your own stomachs and intestines.