Jun 14, 2009 23:00
So. I don't know that I've talked about this explicitly. Tomorrow will be the first day of my 6-week trial run on Prozac. When I talked to the doctor about it, I remember describing the depression and sounding phony, thinking it's not really that bad, I'm basically over it. But I got the prescription anyway, and I'm glad I did -- last night was . . . not a good night, and it reminded me that I was taking these steps for a reason.
That said, I'm not convinced that SSRIs are the answer -- based on my previous experience with serotonin altering drugs, I tend to react very strongly to them, and there are plenty of horror stories about prozac; it sounds alot like trying to repair a house with only a hammer. And also like the first shot, mostly in the dark, towards finding a mind-chemical cocktail that will actually work.
And I don't have the money to go through a prolonged process with head doctors. I've only seen the prescribing doctor as many times as I have because concerned family is footing the bill, and that's not a ledge I like standing on for longer than I have to.
So. anyhow. We all know by now that I am not good at keeping on writing schedules I set for myself, but I am going to try to record, at least briefly everyday, my 6 week prozac experience.
hrm. the thing that bums me out a little is that in six weeks I'll be in Italy, and if this doesn't work out, I'll be a prozac zombie during my first international trip. If I don't feel like it's helping at all after a month, or if I feel muzzy or weird or uncomfortable, I may just self-medicate down to one capsule every other day, instead of one a day, during that trip.
anyhow anyhow. I actually am a little hopeful about this -- combined with not drinking for a month, at all, and only moderately during weeks 5 and 6. lately I've been more nervous than usual, and my skin has been tight and over-sensitive. Anything that helps with that: golden.
how're you?