(no subject)
I miss mah momma. ):
seriously, it kind of sucks. She left for the weekend, came back last night and now is at the airport getting ready to board a flight for Germany. For 2 weeks. Oh, and my birthday is next week- she's missing that. I don't know why I'm so depressed now, though, why it's finally hitting me because I've dealt with this kind of shit since I was born lol. But it's really starting to affect me, and last night when I was laying in bed I thought about that time she went to Chicago when I was in 3rd grade. I remember bolting up in bed, waking up from a really bad nightmare and wanting my mom. Then, it hit me that she wasn't home and I felt nauseous, the pit in the bottom of my stomach was unbearable. I really can feel that like it was yesterday. Blah; I just want her to come back home. I miss her so much.
And on top of that, it's like no one has the time for me. My best friend is always studying, which isn't her fault- she has 5 AP's, 2 of which are Chemistry and Calculus. But still, I kind of miss seeing her face. And my grandparents are leaving for my birthday, too. I know it's ridiculous, since I always talk shit about them. But they always stop by the house on my birthday to wish me a happy birthday. And I miss Nikky. And my dad doesn't really pay attention to me. Ugh. FML.
Whatever, I'll live. Katy Perry is tonight- not that I really care. I'm not really excited, at all.
APs are next week. And as i mentioned previously; so is my birthday. I don't even care. I have a feeling taht my dad is gonna fuck it up and I'll end up crying on my birthday lol. Like really, I have a gut feeling. I don't even think I'm getting anything for my birthday, since we're kind of broke atm. So, fuck that. At least my mom's letting me borrow her Lexus.
Hopefully I'll be in a better mood soon. Grad Bash is Friday- I'm actually excited for that (: