5 months.
Wow; haven't written on this site in a while. Does anyone even use this anymore? Well it's not like it matters exactly, I just need a place to vent and if people want to read my venting and pathetic daily activities, so be it. It's just that everything is happening so fast and I'm quickly reaching the point where if I don't get these feelings out of my system, I'll explode.
So where have I been lately? Under a rock, waiting for people to invite me to do something, waiting for my life to start and for senior year to get better. With the exception of my few friends, Lizzy, Monnica & Alexa, it hasn't been all too successful. Instead I've shut out my friends who I was close with in freshman and sophomore year. Yes, I'm still coping with that loss, "trying" to get myself close with them again. In reality I haven't done such thing, like I've said- I've been sitting and waiting for them to befriend me. Of course I've had no such luck.
Anyway, I went to UCF this weekend. My family and I went to the open house and instantly, I fell in love with the campus. I mean, the way it's set up is really quite impressive and the buildings are beautiful. As the day proceeded and the more information we found out about the school and about what I applied for, journalism, I fell in love with the idea of going to the school yet grew more and more scared at the fact that I probably won't get in. It happens to be that journalism is a "limited major" and that only a few students get in the school for the program. My heart sank as I heard that and my nails dug into my skin. So many thoughts ran into my mind at that moment ranging from "I needed to go there" to "Don't get your hopes up, Chelsea." I thought that all my activity in freshman-sophomore year wouldn't matter, that it was all junior year that mattered. But I did terrible in that year as well. As a result, my profile is a horrible GPA & SAT scores. Not impressive in the slightest and I would most definitely understand why a school would not accept me.
However, just sitting in a classroom at UCF made me realize that there is nothing more that I have ever wanted. I know that it isn't that prestigious of a school and that for most people it isn't hard to get into. But for me it felt like home. I also realized as I was sitting there, that I am a passive person. That I let opportunities slip me by and friends slip me by and I don't realize until it's much too late. It's also like that with this one boy I have a crush on. He's so cute and I get the butterflies whenever I see him but he doesn't even know my name or that I even exist. Back to what I was saying, I realized that if I want something so bad that I shouldn't sit around doing nothing and although I know it's too late to do anything about UCF, I shouldn't let everything else pass me by. I shouldn't wait around for opportunities to come to me- I should chase after what I want.
So I have 5 months of high school left. I have 5 months to make a difference in my life and to make my experience up to my standards.
I'm up for the challenege.
So where have I been lately? Under a rock, waiting for people to invite me to do something, waiting for my life to start and for senior year to get better. With the exception of my few friends, Lizzy, Monnica & Alexa, it hasn't been all too successful. Instead I've shut out my friends who I was close with in freshman and sophomore year. Yes, I'm still coping with that loss, "trying" to get myself close with them again. In reality I haven't done such thing, like I've said- I've been sitting and waiting for them to befriend me. Of course I've had no such luck.
Anyway, I went to UCF this weekend. My family and I went to the open house and instantly, I fell in love with the campus. I mean, the way it's set up is really quite impressive and the buildings are beautiful. As the day proceeded and the more information we found out about the school and about what I applied for, journalism, I fell in love with the idea of going to the school yet grew more and more scared at the fact that I probably won't get in. It happens to be that journalism is a "limited major" and that only a few students get in the school for the program. My heart sank as I heard that and my nails dug into my skin. So many thoughts ran into my mind at that moment ranging from "I needed to go there" to "Don't get your hopes up, Chelsea." I thought that all my activity in freshman-sophomore year wouldn't matter, that it was all junior year that mattered. But I did terrible in that year as well. As a result, my profile is a horrible GPA & SAT scores. Not impressive in the slightest and I would most definitely understand why a school would not accept me.
However, just sitting in a classroom at UCF made me realize that there is nothing more that I have ever wanted. I know that it isn't that prestigious of a school and that for most people it isn't hard to get into. But for me it felt like home. I also realized as I was sitting there, that I am a passive person. That I let opportunities slip me by and friends slip me by and I don't realize until it's much too late. It's also like that with this one boy I have a crush on. He's so cute and I get the butterflies whenever I see him but he doesn't even know my name or that I even exist. Back to what I was saying, I realized that if I want something so bad that I shouldn't sit around doing nothing and although I know it's too late to do anything about UCF, I shouldn't let everything else pass me by. I shouldn't wait around for opportunities to come to me- I should chase after what I want.
So I have 5 months of high school left. I have 5 months to make a difference in my life and to make my experience up to my standards.
I'm up for the challenege.