I knew it would be hard, but nothing like this.
This is the kind of pain that draws your shoulders to your knees, and your head to your feet. And I can't ignore it or escape it.
I couldn't imagine myself with anyone else. Those two years were the best two years I have ever experienced. If I could, I would only change one thing-- the hurt I caused you so many times. If I hadn't done any of those idiotic, fucking stupid things, I wouldn't be feeling this way, and neither would you. There is no need to dwell on that, however. The past cannot be changed. I have never experienced care or love like that before. I appreciate you more than words could ever decipher.
When I was down, you picked me up. When I cried, you made me laugh. When I smiled, it was because of you. I don't know why I ever did anything so stupid as to hurt you. I know you forgave me, but I cannot forgive myself without time alone. I wish I could tell you that we'd be back together tomorrow, but the truth is that I can't. I can't tell you if we ever will, and that fucking kills me. We had plans. But all these things are catching up with me, and I keep going on the simple fact that I cannot hurt you if I am not with you. The part about not being able to hurt you makes me smile, but the other part breaks my heart. More than anyone could imagine.
Two years is a long time. I hope you know that in my eyes, you are damn near perfect. You never lied. You never hurt me. You were as close to perfect as any girl could ask for. And here I am, throwing it away. And it hurts more than anything I have ever experienced. I can't quit thinking about all the fun times.
It was so hard to say goodbye tonight. I hope you are okay. Whatever doesn't destroy us makes us stronger. The ride home was the shortest and longest ride home. I am going to miss you so fucking much. And if it is God's will, we will be together again someday. You know that.
I'm sorry for everything I ever did to hurt you. I'm sorry for everything I said and everything I didn't say. You are so special to me. I won't ever forget you and all the little things that no one else will ever understand.
I wish I had never ever did any of those things. You better know this. I love you. I miss you.
It only figures that the only night you want all red lights, they are all green, isn't it?
I couldn't imagine myself with anyone else. Those two years were the best two years I have ever experienced. If I could, I would only change one thing-- the hurt I caused you so many times. If I hadn't done any of those idiotic, fucking stupid things, I wouldn't be feeling this way, and neither would you. There is no need to dwell on that, however. The past cannot be changed. I have never experienced care or love like that before. I appreciate you more than words could ever decipher.
When I was down, you picked me up. When I cried, you made me laugh. When I smiled, it was because of you. I don't know why I ever did anything so stupid as to hurt you. I know you forgave me, but I cannot forgive myself without time alone. I wish I could tell you that we'd be back together tomorrow, but the truth is that I can't. I can't tell you if we ever will, and that fucking kills me. We had plans. But all these things are catching up with me, and I keep going on the simple fact that I cannot hurt you if I am not with you. The part about not being able to hurt you makes me smile, but the other part breaks my heart. More than anyone could imagine.
Two years is a long time. I hope you know that in my eyes, you are damn near perfect. You never lied. You never hurt me. You were as close to perfect as any girl could ask for. And here I am, throwing it away. And it hurts more than anything I have ever experienced. I can't quit thinking about all the fun times.
It was so hard to say goodbye tonight. I hope you are okay. Whatever doesn't destroy us makes us stronger. The ride home was the shortest and longest ride home. I am going to miss you so fucking much. And if it is God's will, we will be together again someday. You know that.
I'm sorry for everything I ever did to hurt you. I'm sorry for everything I said and everything I didn't say. You are so special to me. I won't ever forget you and all the little things that no one else will ever understand.
I wish I had never ever did any of those things. You better know this. I love you. I miss you.
It only figures that the only night you want all red lights, they are all green, isn't it?