(no subject)
I officially hate:
christmas
family
feeling like you have to pretend everything is A-OK cuz someone is sick
people named Doug King
and that said person is the biggest fucking dill hole ever
and that a person in relationship with said dill hole is completely different from who they used to be
and are now a douche
not being able to figure out my new present cuz I am fucking stupid
swearing a lot when i am mad/sad/frustrated
and having a fucking dill hole say he'll kick my ass
(by the way I'm not scared to go to jail for kicking a 50-something year old's ass)
having my own mother not know anything about me
and that she doesn't care
but pretends to want to know something when someone who thinks she is fabulous is around
saying that she doesnt know because I won't talk...but before that moment had she even bothered to ask?
HELL NO
and the fact that we never spend time together anymore
and that i am crying
i HATE that
there is no reason to cry.
and that i have to work in two and a half hours and i am gonna look like I've been crying to boot
fuck
i hate everything right now.
and then to top it off I have to go see my grandmother tomorrow with my mother
only I'm not sure I will be allowed to go
FUCK
you know Katie is right...Bright Eyes is fucking great when you're emotional
why does everything have to suck ass after I see my mom
christmas was going so well.
it was great
in fact, in another time...i may have been writing everything down that i got today
but it is so fucked
i returned my present from the mother cuz it was so impersonal and says "i don't know or want to know you"
and of course Doug's perfect "Tiffy" got gifts. Now, don't think that i want presents and more presents.
christmas is about thought. ok thinking things through and giving a gift to some one. and then giving money to someone with a spending issue
wow.
i don't even fucking care anymore
and dont' feel bad for me.
im just pissed and venting.
i know people love me
and care...
but i dont' anymore
no fucking more
i really am done pretending that things are fine
fuck it
no one will get better if no one says anything
fuck cancer
fuck everything
christmas
family
feeling like you have to pretend everything is A-OK cuz someone is sick
people named Doug King
and that said person is the biggest fucking dill hole ever
and that a person in relationship with said dill hole is completely different from who they used to be
and are now a douche
not being able to figure out my new present cuz I am fucking stupid
swearing a lot when i am mad/sad/frustrated
and having a fucking dill hole say he'll kick my ass
(by the way I'm not scared to go to jail for kicking a 50-something year old's ass)
having my own mother not know anything about me
and that she doesn't care
but pretends to want to know something when someone who thinks she is fabulous is around
saying that she doesnt know because I won't talk...but before that moment had she even bothered to ask?
HELL NO
and the fact that we never spend time together anymore
and that i am crying
i HATE that
there is no reason to cry.
and that i have to work in two and a half hours and i am gonna look like I've been crying to boot
fuck
i hate everything right now.
and then to top it off I have to go see my grandmother tomorrow with my mother
only I'm not sure I will be allowed to go
FUCK
you know Katie is right...Bright Eyes is fucking great when you're emotional
why does everything have to suck ass after I see my mom
christmas was going so well.
it was great
in fact, in another time...i may have been writing everything down that i got today
but it is so fucked
i returned my present from the mother cuz it was so impersonal and says "i don't know or want to know you"
and of course Doug's perfect "Tiffy" got gifts. Now, don't think that i want presents and more presents.
christmas is about thought. ok thinking things through and giving a gift to some one. and then giving money to someone with a spending issue
wow.
i don't even fucking care anymore
and dont' feel bad for me.
im just pissed and venting.
i know people love me
and care...
but i dont' anymore
no fucking more
i really am done pretending that things are fine
fuck it
no one will get better if no one says anything
fuck cancer
fuck everything